"Cranberry leather looks good on you.""I stole it from your closet after the sex we had together."We all knew this day would come, we were just waiting for the title. Vin Diesel, Paul Walker, and director Justin Lin are back for another Fast (fill it in) Furious, and they're naming this one after an instant scratchers lottery ticket. Fast Five, the fourth sequel in the franchise, promises more car chases, car crashes, Diesel and Walker disagreeing then agreeing on a plan of action, and latina cleavage.Fast & Furious made over $500 million at the box office so it's not surprising that Universal is rushing another one into production. I'm sure it didn't take long to get the key players together. An exec had to go over to Vin Diesel's place and get his okay, then stop by the dumpster outside where Paul Walker was eating breakfast. He threw a banana peel and scampered off, solidifying his involvement. (Variety)
Professional big British dude Vinnie Jones is interested in opening a chain of British pubs with fellow Redcoat Jason Statham. In fact, they've been talking about it for some time but their schedules have never let them a lot of time to dig in. Says Jones with rounded vowels:Jay has been working so much and so have I. The pubs will happen. We had a great spot right opposite the pier in Santa Monica. They just wanted too much rent. Me and Jay went to look at it and we had three other investors, all Brits. The mates discussed calling their chain "The Snatch Bar," which would be a decidedly disappointing place to hold a bachelor party. Rather than naked skanks and coeds, the place would be crawling with Australians. **slide whistle sound as erection deflates**This news will undoubtedly be a let down for 50 Cent, who has approached Jones about opening their own chain of English pubs. Jones however, was not interested. Either he felt it would work better in British hands or he and Fitty couldn't see eye-to-eye on the name "In Da Pub." (WENN)
Shutter Island Superbowl Spot – Watch more Funny VideosHere's an early leak of the Superbowl spot for Martin Scorsese's Shutter Island. This spot does away with the slow build we've seen in the others and jumps right into the psyche-bending action. It looks unlike anything Scorsese has done before and seems like it could be an entertaining winter film. It was also announced that there will be no TV spot for Iron Man 2 during this year's Superbowl. With that in mind, I'm not sure why Paramount would release this before the big game. It seems like it will have little competition. I guess their logic is to build a little additional buzz in the hopes that some extra eyes will see it. Either that or they're helping us all plan our pee breaks. If so, thanks!!
The Griswolds are coming back to the screen! Even if it is just the small screen. We reported in October that a new National Lampoon's Vacation sequel is in the works, but a short film featuring the lovably dysfunctional family is a certainty. Below is just a teaser of what will premiere on HomeAway February 7th. I don't even care that Clark & Ellen are hocking vacation rental homes, they're together again and looking rather dapper. No word if interchangable children Rusty and Audrey will be in the short film, but my fingers are crossed that they somehow work Anthony Michael Hall in there. He already played opposite Chevy on NBC's Community, and I'd like to see Clark give him a few incoherent words of wisdom one last time. Check out The Griswolds teaser after the jump.
Renowned Elmo tormentor Ricky Gervais has teamed again with his The Office/Extras co-creator Stephen Merchant to write and direct Cemetery Junction. And… and… honestly, I have no idea what it's about. I watched this trailer four times now and couldn't understand a word of it. Is that a real language that they're speaking? If so, is it called Chimney Sweep?? Here's what the studio claims it is about:Cemetery Junction, set in 1970s England, follows three blue-collar friends who spend their days joking, drinking and chasing girls. Freddie (Christian Cooke) wants to leave their working-class world, but cool, charismatic Bruce (Tom Hughes) and lovable loser Snork (Jack Doolan) are happy with life the way it is.Okay. That's what they claim. But to me this could just as easily be a movie about the formation of The Beatles. Or the Stones. Or Wayne Fontana and the Mindbenders. I CAN'T F***ING TELL!! Watch the trailer after the jump, and please provide translation in the comments section.
Directors: Ricky Gervais & Stephen MerchantCast: Ricky Gervais, Ralph Fiennes, Matthew Goode, Emily WatsonSynopsis: A 1970s-set comedy centered on three upstart professional men working at an insurance company.
MacGyver creator Lee Zlotoff is not happy with SNL's big-screen parody of his guy-with-a-mullet-displaying-ingenuity-with-everyday-household-items-in-order-to-get-out-of-life-threatening-scrapes-at-the-last-second action series. Hollywood Reporter reports Hollywoodily, that he is preparing legal action against Relativity Media to block the April 23rd release of the butt and boob filled MacGruber. Some say that parody falls within the realm of fair use while Zlotoff feels like there is a big difference between a short sketch and a 90-minute film, especially while he is developing MacGyver for the big screen himself.Seems like an uphill battle, if only because nobody besides Lee Zlotoff wants to see a MacGyver movie. As he prepares his case, I hope he refers to 1991's controversial Top Gun v. Hot Shots! If you'll remember, the case was dismissed when a confused Lloyd Bridges shuffled around the courtroom while farting a melody eerily similar to "Who Let the Dogs Out." But it was the crap he took in the corner that angered the judge the most. (THR)
Amanda Seyfried was the airhead member of "The Plastics" in Mean Girls, starred in Big Love and Jennifer's Body, and has freakishly large blue eyes. I find them slightly off-putting in a sexy way that I'm uncertain of.A word from Amanda: "Jeans are just so sexy, there's something about them that turns me on, you know?"If you're asking me if women wearing jeans is sexy, than yes, I get it. If you're asking me if I'd hump a pair of jeans without anyone filling them, than yes, I get it.More pics of Amanda not wearing jeans after the jump.
It's a true fact that Japan's chief exports are crazy sh*t and tuna. This commercial for Hagoromo Tuna kills two birds with one stone. It's not the first time we've seen a foreign "homage" to Star Wars, but it is the first time we've seen the iconic characters pimp probably-not-dolphin-safe salads and hors d'oeuvres. A large part of our job here at Screen Junkies is to look at pictures of hot actresses (like KRISTEN BELL IN HER UNDERWEAR or SEXY PATRICIA De LEON BEING SEXY for instance), yet I can't take my eyes off C3PO's tight, little rear. Please let it be a chick under that costume. (Buzzfeed)
We have video proof of the racist pot calling the kettle black. In his interview with Dean Richards of Chicago's WGNtv, Mel Gibson doesn't approve of the reporter's probing questions regarding all that dispicable stuff he did. The drinking and swearing was sooooooo five years ago, Richards. At the end of the segment, Gibson throws a tiny dig in right before the feed cuts out. That's like pulling up next to a bicycle cop in your lowered Honda Accord and shouting "Pig!" before peeling out whilst cackling. Total burn, dude.
Variety recently mentioned that there's a chance Transformers 3 may be filmed using 3D cameras. Paramount wants that but it may go against director Michael Bay's wishes. And you don't want to defy Michael Bay. He throws the best parties. He rents tigers, you guys.Bay has spoken out against 3D in the past believing that it won't gel well with his films. And I definitely agree. Megan Fox notwithstanding, why would I want his movies any closer to my face? The robots in Transformers were confusing, muddled masses of scrap which were all but impossible to distinguish between during fight scenes. It was like staring at a Magic Art poster with racist characters.Of course, that was Bay's stance before Avatar bent over and dogged the global box office. Maybe the money and studio pressure will change his mind but I urge the cash-loving suits to remember one thing: Michael Bay is an artist. Didn't you see his Victoria's Secret ad? (Variety)
Though he's currently busy Oscar shoe-in being and We Are The Worlding, Jeff Bridges is also appearing in next winter's Tron Legacy, the follow-up to Bridges' classic sci-fi film. Today we have an alleged "first look" at Bridges in the sequel, but that's only if you don't consider the Comic-Con teaser trailer. Which is pretty cool looking by the way (posted after the jump). In the newly released photo, we see Bridges dressed as an iPod. He and Bruce Boxleitner are going to be big hits at the Boing Boing Halloween party. (Cinema Blend)
That's Lyndsy Fonseca, and she's in the new international red-band trailer for Kick-Ass. The trailer also features some new footage, a good story summary, and Chloe Moretz spouting out a particularly filthy word, but the quick glimpses of Lyndsy alone are worth the key strokes for the age-gate. If you don't watch Desperate Housewives or How I Met Your Mother than you probably are not aware of Lyndsy's winning smile, but you will be soon. I'm even considering seeing Hot Tub Time Machine so I can get a side of Fonseca with my overly broad concept comedy fix.By the way, the word Chloe (Hit Girl) says is "cock." A brain-tingling word like that and they gave it to the jail bait. Laaaaaamesville.Check out the international red-band trailer here.
Kasia Smutniak is a Polish hottie who started her modeling career at the ripe age of 15. She's been in a few movies with names I can't pronounce, but mostly she's nice to look at. Also, her last name has the word "smut" in it, and that makes me giggle because I'm stupid. A word from Kasia: "Working with people like Jon and Jonathan, it was very helpful."Did Jon let you shave his head while Jonathan braided your hair? I bet you guys did that every night when you should have been learning your lines. You scoundrels. Check out more SMUTniak after the jump.
Last we heard about Jon Favreau's Cowboys & Aliens was that original star Robert Downey Jr. was bailing in favor of talking like a British queef in the Sherlock Holmes sequel. Since that time, Daniel Craig has agreed to strap on the chaps left empty by Downey Jr.. Today comes news that Olivia Wilde has joined the cast. Probably in a sexily way, knowing her.Wilde will play Ella, a woman who joins Craig's gunslinger in the uprising against an alien invasion. Shooting is expected to begin this summer. No word yet on when the porn parody Reverse Cowgirls & Aliens will go before cameras. But we'll keep you posted. (THR)
BEST DIRECTOR SHOWDOWN This year’s Oscar nominations have been announced, which means it’s time to take the frontrunners from each category and throw them into the Thunderdome where they’ll wage…
"I'm gonna get you so good, Sam Worthington." Up until now, all the materials we've seen from Clash of the Titans have focused mainly on Liam Neeson's permed beard, monster-fighting, and the Monsters of Rock soundtrack. The new international trailer offers a change of pace by taking a breath to set up the plot of the movie. It seems that the mortals have drawn the ire of Hades so naturally it's statue-tumbling time. To make matters worse, the humans rebel against the Gods which provokes Zeus to the point where he's forced to use his shockwave fist-slam (that's how you know when he's pissed). Then, it's all out war and Gemma Arterton shows up to act stalkery. After that, it's mainly what we've seen before: Sam Worthington fighting the Starship Troopers bugs, an Orc, that monster from Pan's Labyrinth, and those angel-monsters that were out-of-place in Max Payne. And, of course, it closes with Liam Neeson releasing his Kraken. Seriously Liam, quit whipping that thing out all the time. Check out the trailer after the jump.
Remember in Ong Bak 2 when Tony Jaa vaulted off an elephant's face in order to kick a guy extra hard (footage here)? How do you top that? With more elephants, stupid. And this time dress them up. Audiences like it when animals think they're people. The trailer for Ong Bak 3 has arrived. I'm not totally sure about the film's plot specifics (or if it has one), but I can tell you that Tony Jaa is going to kick dudes' asses in ways you never thought possible. For instance, in the trailer he uses his own groin to smack a guy in the face. Imagine how bad you would feel if a dude beat you senseless using his donger as a weapon. I didn't know that could be done. Is d*ckboxing a thing? (Film School Rejects) Watch guys get knocked off elephants after the jump…
Dancin and Breakin Predators – Watch more Funny VideosFirst there was the Predator Rap, and now those wily aliens have gone and put a dance routine together. Even with all the armor these Predators can pop and lock like a crew with true cred. Lionel Douglass -AKA- Big "D" is a member of the original Don Campbellock dance group the "Lockers." He is also the creator of this ridiculous display. Never have Predators looked so unintimidating.
DIRECTOR: Tony JaaCAST: Tony Jaa; Saranyu Wonggrajang; Primrata Dechudom; Nirutti Sirijanya; ElephantsSYNOPSIS: The legend of Ong Bak 3 begins after Tien (Tony Jaa) has lost his fighting skills and his beloved stepfather at the Garuda’s Wing cliff from the raid led by Jom Rachan (Saranyu Wonggrajang). Tien is brought back to life with the help from Pim (Primrata Dechudom) as well as Mhen (Petchai Wongkamlao) and the Kana Khone villagers. Deep into the meditation taught by Phra Bua (Nirutti Sirijanya), Tien finally is able to achieve ‘Nathayut’. His talents are put to the test again when his rivals including the Golden-Armored King’s Guard (Supakorn ‘Tok’ Kijusuwan), the mysterious killers in black, and Bhuti Sangkha (Dan Chupong) return for the final massive showdown.
In the upcoming film From Paris with Love, John Travolta brings back one of Hollywood's favorite archetypes – the "Loose Cannon."ScreenJunkies thought it would be best to bring in a psychologist to analyze our favorite loose cannon partners.
"Get your own elder-porn!"Universal is eager to put Jason Bourne back on screens but have had some difficulty churning out another amnesia spy thriller. In the three years since The Bourne Ultimatum was released, they've tried to no avail to get a script. Director Paul Greengrass has cut and run and taken Matt Damon with him. So what does a studio do in this situation?If you said "reboot in 3D", you're almost right and there's a job waiting for you at Sony. In the case of Bourne however, the studio may be biding their time with a prequel according to Matt Damon. "There'll probably be a prequel of some kind with another actor and another director before we do another one. Just because I think we're probably another five years away from doing it – we've got to get a script. If you have any ideas, call Universal. They'd love for you to get in touch!"That could be pretty cool actually. We'll get to see Jason Bourne in his spying and parkouring glory. This two big questions though; a) how young will they go? And, b) how do we keep Channing Tatum far away from this project? (Empire)
Someone decided to "turn" a tad prematurely. Here are your weekend links.25 People Kicked in the Nuts (HolyTaco)A 1/2 Rotation Backflip Can be Painful (TotalProSports)Hot Girls in Mirrors Make Great Photographers (TheChive)Lessons We've Learned from Gambling Movies (Moviefone)8 Wettest & Wildest Videos (Maxim)Farther Down the Juggalo Rabbit Hole (FilmDrunk)Where the Wild Sopranos Are (Manofest)10 Most Indelible Characters of the Last 100 Years (Pajiba)"Pants on the Ground" Singer Found Dead (CelebJihad)You Cannot Beat the J.J. Abrams Board Game (Unreality)Best Videos of the iPad Backlash (Asylum)8 Rejected iPad Prototypes (RegretfulMorning)6 Best Beer and Grub Combos (MadeMan)Will Hamlin's Injury Affect His 2010 Season (AllLeftTurns)
"Did you just place a LATKA in front of me?" Mel Gibson does crazy well, both on screen and off. Our friends over at Moviefone were tolerant enough to scour through all of his rants and compile them in to one neat little tirade. It's only the movie stuff though, so don't expect much anti-semitism or disrespect towards female police officers. Such comments are only reserved for real life.
"Hmmm… you kind of look like a greyhound when you take your shirt off." Maybe I was too hard on She's Out Of My League the last time I wrote about it. Probably not but maybe. The red band trailer has inserted itself into the warm, fleshy pocket that is the Internet and rubbed a few laughs against its walls.For the most part, it's what we've already seen; nerdy guy obtains seemingly-unobtainable girl and his friends and family are dicks about the whole thing. However, the new scenes added indicate that this movie is a lot more inventive than the cheaply cranked-out Road Trip: Beer Pong or American Pie Presents cinemabortions. Some people say adding "f*cks" for funny is just a crutch. I say hobble on over here. I may have to give this one half of a half of a chance. Early ruling: two out of five Eugene Levys (note: Eugene Levys are not good awards to receive). Check out the NSFW trailer here.
The graphic novel The Losers has transmovieafied its way to the big screen and today we have the trailer. It's the standard elite team of emissaries are betrayed by Jason Patric plot. But it looks like it could be fun. It borrows a good deal of its charm from The Italian Job and the Ocean's films and rests that on the shoulders of a cast comprised of rising stars. Jeffrey Dean Morgan, Zoe Saldana, Idris Elba, and a nerdy Chris Evans (and his mind bullets) have a great rapport. This looks like it will either be a modest hit or a fun but forgettable mid-season film. Not all of the jokes hit in this trailer. For instance, after Elba successfully blows up a SUV with a homemade rocket launcher, he exclaims, "I'm the black MacGuyver! BlaGuyver!!" We'll never see a black MacGuyver in our lifetimes. MacGuyver's love of ice hockey makes that an impossibility. (MSN) Watch the trailer after the jump…
The Muppet Gang leisurely rushes Kermit to the hospital. Flight of the Conchords co-creator James Bobin has been given the go-ahead to direct Disney's New Muppet Movie, he just has to decide if he wants to play with dolls all day. The choice could prove to be a difficult one considering Judd Apatow is also tugging on Bobin's sleave to direct his new movie Bridemaids, written by awkward-character-playing SNL cast member Kristen Wiig. "What to do, what to do?!" screams Bobin's conscience. One would think Bobin would like to dive head first in to Apatow's bouncy castle of go-to guys, but taking the reins of a Muppet Movie written by Jason Segel and Forgetting Sarah Marshall director Nicholas Stoller could give his feature career the soft, furry kick in the pants it needs. With Bobin et al manning The Muppets, we're sure to get something more edgy than pies in the face and spinning bowties on bears. But I'm not expecting hot pig-on-frog action either. (Vulture)
We're through the looking glass here, people. Caligula director Tinto Brass has announced that due to Avatar, the technology now exists to film a Cleveland Steamer in stereoscopic 3D.The Italian erotic director plans to "revisit an abandoned project about a Roman emperor that was ruined by Americans, and go from there." It's obvious that Brass has sour grapes (hehe) with his Caligula partners, who added hardcore sex scenes without his consent to the famously terrible film. The movie was so bad in fact, that Roger Ebert referred to it as "sickening, utterly worthless, shameful trash," and "the worst piece of sh*t I've ever masturbated to." Just because we have the ability, doesn't necessarily mean that we should use it. As technology burgeons, this debate will continue and deserves considerable thought. We need to be careful how we move forward as a society with cloning, stem cells, nuclear weapons, and the illusion that a vagina is squirting directly at you. (THR)
A new poster for Hot Tub Time Machine goes beyond the red band trailer to reveal the secret of time travel. Scientists are going to kick their own asses in the balls when they see how simple the formula was all along. Using simple algebra, one combines energy drink, vodka, and a squirrel. Add that to four mismatched friends and divide the sum by a hot tub.Let's sincerely hope those components do not actually unlock space and time. Ted Nugent probably has a hot tub and more than likely he's tripping over crunk juice and squirrels. I don't want to imagine a reality where he has traveled back through time and become our overlord. He'll hunt us all. (EW)
Somewhere Kevin Smith smokes wistfully.After 31 years of bringing groundbreaking, original films and the Scary Movies to a national audience, independent film studio Miramax will shutter its doors. The New York and LA offices will close today and 80 staff members will be dismissed.In other news, J.D. Salinger passed away today at the age of 91.File photoThe famous author and recluse would have taken particular joy in seeing a movie studio closed. It's a shame he didn't hang on a little bit longer to enjoy this moment. Though I guess it's for the best. The smile frozen on his corpse would really freak out all the little ones at his wake. (The Wrap)