Michael Bay Says ‘Ninja Turtles’ Film Isn’t About Aliens After All

Tuesday, April 30 by
"COWABOOGABOOGA," as the Ninja Turtles so often say!!! 

BIG NEWS FOR THE TYPE OF PEOPLE WHO GET FIRED UP ABOUT TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES MOVIE NEWS:

Since saying, “These turtles are from an alien race, and they’re going to be tough, edgy, funny, and completely lovable,” a year ago, Michael Bay has changed his tune, this time offering up, “There was that quote saying that we’re making them aliens. We’re not. It’s the ooze!”

I like the exclamation point after “ooze.” It’s a nice touch, and makes this written quote seem as though it should be barked by Tom Cruise or Will Smith.

While it’s pretty likely that Michael Bay heard the rumblings of the internet and changed the script, it’s all a fool’s errand, as adults who are enamored of the Ninja Turtles will always be unhappy about something (their own lives), and will take it out on the easiest person on hand (always Michael Bay).

Embrace it, Michael, and make them Teenage Mutant Jewish Turtles, and have them solve a fictionalized version of the Boston Marathon bombing. Give them something that DESERVES to be criticized.

Do you like this story?