Manure Prices Plummet, Movie Ticket Prices Drop Accordingly

Tuesday, November 1 by
If you saw this picture and thought "Tyler Perry," you're a horrible racist.  

Movie ticket prices have dropped across the nation, from a prohibitive $8.06 to a dirt-cheap $7.94.

Ok. The difference itself may not be mind-blowing, but the fact that the trend of rising ticket prices is reversing is saying something. Namely that audiences are less willing to see movies if they’re really expensive. (I don’t even have an economics degree. I just figured that out. Swear to God.)

However, don’t get too excite that prices are falling across the board. This figure is likely just an indication that people are less willing to pony up for 3D films than they used to be, and your standard ticket prices are the same unreasonably-high bullshit they’ve always been.

But this could send a message to theater owners (theaters set ticket prices, not studios) that people aren’t willing to pay what they once were. The 3D novelty has worn off, and attending movies, especially in big cities, is becoming cost-prohibitive.

Do I propose some sort of global candy-smuggling initiative aimed at letting theater owners know that the only way we’re willing to absorb higher ticket prices is if we do so with pockets full of Pretzel M&M’s and gray-market Red Vine?

Yup. That’s what I’m doing right now. First person to put a good name to this movement in the comments gets the satisfaction of knowing they helped change the world.

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