John Lithgow is a Damn Dirty Ape

Wednesday, June 23 by

They finally made a monkey out of ol’ John Lithgow. Empire Online is reporting that the actor has been confirmed for the upcoming Planet of the Apes prequel, Rise of the Apes. The film costars James Franco and Frida Pinto.

Despite the misleading headline and hackneyed primate references, Lithgow will not be playing an ape. Instead, he has landed the roll of the protagonist’s Alzheimer’s stricken father, which is a lot like playing an ape, since both apes and Alzheimer’s patients have been known to throw feces. You think I’m making a crass joke, but I’m serious. I saw it first hand with my uncle Bobo.