‘Finding Nemo’ Sequel Isn’t Gonna Be About Nemo At All. BULLSHIT!

Tuesday, April 2 by
Two fishes enter. Only one fishes leave.  

Bad news for fans of searching for Nemo. The Finding Nemo sequel will be titled Finding Dory, and will follow the fish voiced by Ellen DeGeneres as her family sets out to find her, torture her, and kill her.

The film, despite being released twelve years after the original, will take place only a year after Finding Nemo, presumably because if the film was to take place much further in the future, the BP oil spill would render all marine life dead, or at least wishing it was.

No more details are available at the moment, though it’s safe to assume the film will be adorable, and all these cynical remarks will seem like a thing of the distant past as Dory finds her fish family in the face of great adversity and teaches us all a little bit about what it’s like to live and love.

*tear*

 

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