The adage ‘time waits for no man…’ was kicked in the teeth and taught to be less impatient with the news that Chuck Norris is celebrating his 70th birthday today. That’s right. Seventy years and nine months ago today, the bearded sperm that would form Chuck Norris round-housed into an ovum and conceived the toughest man this world will ever know. Ryan, Oklahoma remains a crater to this day.
In honor of the sacred day, his family plans to throw him a "know party" because you can’t surprise Chuck Norris. If he were to throw it himself, it would circle the Earth and land at his heels. Happy Birthday, Chuck!