Since a big budget film probably couldn't get an insurance policy on the guy to save its life, Charlie Sheen's first project after Two and a Half Men will be a starring role in the indie flick A Glimpse Inside the Mind of Charlie Banks III opposite Jason Schwartzman. The film will follow Sheen as the titular Banks, as a "successful graphic designer" (clearly fiction) who is ultimately done in by his charm with the ladies.

I'm guessing that Charlie Banks doesn't need to spend hundreds of thousands of dollars on hookers, then.

The Chuck Lorre-figure on this production will presumably by director Roman Coppola, who will take on this project as his feature debut. We at Screen Junkies wish Roman the best of luck in forging ahead after this horrible, horrible casting decision.

We were all hoping that Sheen would sign on for a David O. Russell project that would culminate in a microcosmic World War II between actor and director, but Sheen will have to learn to crawl before he can walk. (Variety)