I normally get pretty upset when supposedly academic networks break from their usual offerings to court new viewers, like when TLC went from helping people learn to show them little people with giant scrotums or Honey Boo-Boo.

However, this news is too awesome not to love. Animal Planet will be rolling out a scripted film called Revenge of the Whale that tells the Moby Dick story from the whale's point of view, which I assume is just a dumb whale swimming around, wondering why some jerk is trying to kill him to feel better about himself.

The press release:
Based on true events, this two-hour film tells one of history’s greatest stories of survival at sea, which inspired Herman Melville’s Moby Dick. Emmy and Golden Globe Award winner Martin Sheen portrays Old Thomas Nickerson, who tells a story of his life as a cabin boy on the ill-fated voyage of the whaling ship the Essex. The action-packed narrative follows Nickerson as, against all odds, he comes through the worst that nature throws at him while growing up quickly in the process. He faces the destructive force of sea storms, the power of whales, the brutal desolation of the sun and sea after the shipwreck and, finally, the dark deeds he must do to survive. The film, a co-production with the BBC, also stars Jonas Armstrong as First Mate Owen Chase and Adam Rayner as Captain Pollard and depicts the pair’s real-life accounts of the sinking of the ship.

So Mr. Dick will turn on his hunters and...MAKE IT PERSONAL.

Yeah, I'd watch that.