And Your MTV VMA Awards Nominees Are…*Eyes, Ears And Anus All Start Gushing Blood At Once*

Wednesday, July 17 by
I love Ellie Goulding.  

It’s that time of year again. The time of year when it’s so hot that your balls stick to the inside of your leg and MTV “nominates” “nominees” for their “awards” show about “bullshit” “music.”

Shit. Strike the quotes around bullshit. That one was sincere.

MTV announced their nominees, and while the hypocrisy is still there (“What’s that? Music Television no longer celebrates music via videos? Gadzooks!”), the list seems a little less irrelevant than years past. Might counter-culture and pop culture be once again stepping towards one another as they did in the early 90’s, when Matt Dillon and Bridget Fonda awkwardly nodded their heads to Screaming Trees before Fred Durst single-handedly fucked everything up for everyone for like 13 years?

Yeah they might be.

Here are your 2013 MTV VMA nominees:

(Shit that’s a long list. And I would have to format it and take out spaces. Ugh. All while my balls stick to my leg? NO.)

Here are your 2013 MTV VMA nominees. 

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