10 Lame-Ass Batman Villains Who Should Never Be In A Film

Friday, March 11 by

Just when you thought you knew all the villains for the upcoming Batman sequel, Gary Oldman comes along and rains on your parade. During the premiere of Red Riding Hood, the actor all but confirmed that Bane and Catwoman are not the only evildoers menacing Gotham, stating that it will include a villain “from way back from the old comics,” and ruling out the Joker. Hugo Strange seems to be the odds-on favorite, and the Riddler’s name pops up from time to time. But no matter who is chosen as the next villain, I’m sure the film will be awesome. Unless, of course, Christopher Nolan has started smoking crack, and decides to go with one of these 9 lame-asses.

Killer Moth

On paper, Killer Moth isn’t that bad. He first appeared in 1951 as a criminal who took on the role of the anti-Batman. He even set up his own “Moth Cave” in order to emulate the caped crusader. But at the end of the day, a guy dressed like a moth just isn’t going to work in a movie. I mean, The Moth Man Prophecies was cheesy enough. Imagine a guy in green spandex pretending to be a bug? Besides, don’t bats eat moths?

King Tut

I loved the 1960’s Batman series when I was a little kid. Guess what? Little kids are stupid. That’s why we don’t let the vote, on drive, or leave their cages on the weekends. That show was awful, so it makes sense that a character made specifically for that show would be awful, as well. Unless you want a fat dude who mistakenly believes he’s the reincarnation of a long dead Egyptia fighting the caped crusader, it’s best they leave him out of the next film.

Kite Man

If you’re a super villain, hang-gliders can be a pretty cool tool. Kites, on the other hand, don’t really elicit the same emotional response, probably because they’re associated with children. Does building an evil reputation based entirely off of a child’s toy sound like a good idea to you? It did to Kite Man. Even his weapons are kite related. I’ve never seen a kite that could withstand a shotgun blast, so I’m not really sure how Kite Man managed to survive this long. Batman should really look into buying a gun.

COMMENTS

  1. March 11, 2011 2:04 pm

    Anonymous

    what about swimsuit calendar man?


  2. March 11, 2011 2:04 pm

    Anonymous

    He’s OK.


  3. March 11, 2011 2:04 pm

    Martin

    They could just go back to KGBeast’s original name, which was just the Beast.

    Catman was a shitty villain, but he’s a pretty cool antihero now.


  4. March 11, 2011 2:04 pm

    Thor

    You be quiet! How else can we cast Jeff Dunham in this movie if not as The Ventriloquist?


  5. March 11, 2011 2:04 pm

    calendarmanfan

    You leave Calendar Man alone!


  6. March 11, 2011 2:04 pm

    Paulo

    Serial killer cat man from LODK was cool, would make a great movie villain.