We Rank The Carl’s Jr. Ads From Best To Worst

Tuesday, February 28 by
I've gotta learn to cook patty melts. 

With all of the excitement of the Oscars this past weekend, everybody nearly missed this week’s instance of Kate Upton taking off her shirt. Well, that’s why we’re here. To serve as a net that catches all good chunks of life blown across oblivion.

Upton stars in the latest Carl’s Jr. ad. These ads have become an institution, featuring an impossibly hot celebrity eating the diarrhea-inducing sandwiches in the most softcore way possible. Like pin up girls getting down on some fast food.

Critics of these ads feel these advertisements are in extremely bad taste as they reduce women into nothing more than props bent and manipulated for male entertainment. Props that we can now compare to one another and evaluate. And such, here are the five hottest Carl’s Jr ads ranked in order of hottest to most tame.

Kate Upton

Kate Upton deserves an award. All the awards actually. With her new Carl’s Jr ad she lifts the series out of a dark place where it had previously run a ground. Wearing this tiny polka dot dress, she bites into a spicy Carl’s Jr sandwich at the drive-inn. The resulting place causes her to writhe around and strip in the car‘s backseat. Not in a “Hey, we better call 9-1-1″ kind of way, but in a “Hey, I should be using my camera phone right now,” kind of way.

My only question though is, why would this girl have to take herself out on a date?

Watching this at the Internet Cafe will get you:

6 out of 6 craned necks.