Tiny monsters, unless they find their way up your pants leg just aren’t all that scary. Now add hundreds to thousands of pounds and some anger issues and you’ve got the 6 biggest movie giants that terrorized the common people and caused a renaissance of adult bedwetting.
Fezzik, “The Princess Bride”
Fezzik could’ve pressed flowers as a hobby but it still wouldn’t offset his hugeness, which demands a healthy fear strictly on the fight or flight basis triggered in your brain. Anytime you have a guy who could hit his head on the second floor ceiling while standing on the first floor, you’re going to be ill at ease until he’s tied up “Gulliver’s Travels” style or at least on another continent. In “The Princess Bride”, Fezzik kindly decides to not crush Westley by throwing boulders and instead squares off with him hand to hand, although he lost in the end, he defines the word “manhandle” as he tosses and smacks Westley around as nothing more than an annoying gnat.
Cyclops, “Wrath of the Titans”
A killer of a movie giant, the Cyclops isn’t out to make friends or learn a new career skill, he just wants to eat some humans and then nap off the resultant gas he gets from his favorite treat. Any creature that knocks trees down with a single blow, often using another tree to do it, should be respected from a far off distance, or even another planet. As the Cyclops turns some of Perseus’ group into literal blood smears in the forest, then chases Perseus like the boulder in “Indiana Jones and the Lost Ark,” let that tingling sense of fear take over and enjoy.
Masaru Daisato, “Big Man Japan”
Struggling under the famous shadows cast by his superhero grandfather and father along with a series of missteps and screw-ups in his carrying of the title of giant protector of Japan, Masaru Daisato’s life is on a downswing. Despite his growing critics and his depression in dealing with his separation from his wife and son, Daisato continues to uphold the torch passed on through his bloodline. His fight with the strangling monster is a battle of giants as Daisato struggles against a constricting giant with a horrendous comb over is a battle to catch.
Amphibious Monster, “The Host”
It’s not going to take down any skyscrapers by scratching its back on one Godzilla style, but the monster in “The Host” is definitely one scary movie giant to respectfully fear. With a penchant for snacking on humans and a rumbly tummy, the creature’s first major attack occurs by a river as it makes short work of the locals along the river, kidnapping the daughter of a family run convenience shack. Without mini-guns or chemically supplemented action heroes, the family goes on a quest to get the daughter back, creating the tremendous scene of the grandfather taking a potshot at the creature only to have it demonstrate its power by knocking their shop over using some seriously large calf muscles.
Jotnar, “Troll Hunter”
From out of the frozen northern wastes, also known as Scandinavia, comes a present day look at mythology as the Norwegian government regulates their country’s troll population while keeping their presence a secret from the general populace. “Troll Hunter” follows a documentary crew that thinks they’re after a poacher called Hans but soon are thrust into the hidden and dangerous world of troll regulation. As the Jotnar pierces the mist, the terror of both its enormity and the lack of any back up sets in creating a truly horrifying movie giant.
Alien Race, “Monsters”
Not the movie for NASA to show at their annual fund raiser/bake sale, “Monsters” features an alien species hitching a ride to Earth on a NASA probe and then making themselves very much at home. Whether these Cthulu-looking aliens have migraines and thus attack sources of noise and light or they’re just space jerks, they do enough human stomping to please Bender of “Futurama”. As long as you’re not into Lovecraft fetishes, “Monsters” provides plenty of fright as our two Americans flee from Mexico using a coyote convoy that gets taken apart by the aliens without any serious effort.