Screen Junkies’ 1st Annual ‘Sexiest Man Not Alive’ Awards

Wednesday, November 16 by

Colter Stevens

The protagonist of Source Code bears Jake Gyllenhaal’s trademark good looks, with a sense of duty for country that is unparalleled. Not only that, but the way he looks after Michelle Monaghan’s character is truly chivalrous. He’s a very handsome man, who has the added bonus of being dead the entire time.

I’ll take him over Eric Bana any day!

Chubbs

Sure, he’s alive when Happy Gilmore starts, but afer he dies, Chubbs (played to perfection by the handsome Carl Weathers) doesn’t lose a point in the looks department. He can appear in my dreams any day!

Ok. I’ll level with you. I don’t find Chubbs to be sexy. I mean, he’s pretty sexy, but probably not “list-worthy” sexy. The fact of the matter is that this list is mostly white guys, and I’ve really been trying to make a concerted effort to include more men and women of color in my lists.

Let’s compromise by saying Chubbs is extremely sexy WHEN HE WANTS TO BE.

Ned Stark’s Head on a Pike

I didn’t want to go down the slippery slope of identifying random dead body parts as “sexy” but I guess I did just that by citing the upper half of the well zombie from The Walking Dead, so it wouldn’t be fair to draw the line there.

When Game of Thrones viewers first saw Ned Stark’s head on a pike, it was an absolute vision, and I’m not the type that normally falls for disembodied heads. (Ok. That’s a lie.) With his slack jaw, it’s hard to tell if he’s smiling or brooding, but either way, I’m intrigued. Also, is it just me, or did Ned getting his head chopped off give him an even more lush head of hair? It’s probably just my imagination, but whatever. It’s doing it for me!