Movie Lists - Page 55

Good rule of thumb: If you shrunk your children or they are full-sized, but screwing pies, you’re probably not fit as a parent.

These stereotypes are lazy. Not the characters themselves, but the writing behind them.

My spank bank needs a bailout.

An exploration of America’s favorite chip most memorable scenes.

When we telephoned Brimley to get a quote for the piece, he offered up, “Don’t call this number again, dammit.”

Even the ridiculously attractive can be homeless.

What happens when a random crime isn’t so random after all.

It’s a good thing they’re around to point out what’s wrong with everything.

Someone needs some Norton Anti-Virus.

Stupid Light! You’re not so fast after all!

Eminem is not in the running.

I advise that you go outside and fire wildly into the sky.

Special thanks to Aerosmith for making some really hot girls…

There are so many jobs more fulfilling than “B-list movie star.” Just ask my mechanic, Michael Dudikoff.

Jesse James and Sandra Bullock were deemed ineligible for consideration this year.

A patient nation still holds out for ‘Top Scallop’.

It’s still the best deal in town.

If Spinning Teacups can be a ride, so can these.

He’s a very short man. Sometimes, it just doesn’t add up.

Brought to you by the fine people at Red Bull Energy Drink. Delicious.

Oh, they’ll go to live with a family on a farm, all right…*takes off sunglasses*…a death farm.

You’ve got to hand it to us. These are some cool prosthetics.

Always bet on the cheaters. It’s the smart move.

Hard to believe, but sometimes remakes aren’t complete trash.