Morgan Freeman For President In 2012

Wednesday, October 12 by

He’s In The Process Of Getting Divorced

This guy will bolster his approval ratings by sleeping with everyone.

Of course, the family values people will have a field day with this, but this country doesn’t really care about family values anymore. What this country wants is hot, juicy gossip, and no one would better fit that bill than a handsome, stylish, SINGLE presidential candidate. Why read about the president in Newsweek when you could peruse USWeekly and find everything you need to know at his late-night date at the Spotted Pig in Manhattan.

All The Other Candidates Kind Of Suck Anyway

Oh, yeah, these guys look WAY more fun than Morgan Freeman

Today, America is a house divided among party and ideological lines. So now is the perfect time for a likable guy with no real political baggage to get caught up in. Sure, he backed Obama, but 3 years ago, EVERYONE was backing Obama. It was like supporting rainbows or delicious iced tea on a hot summer day.

What I’m getting at is that Mr. Freeman is primed to sneak in as a third-party candidate and get the gold. Sure, third-party candidates haven’t gotten much traction in the past, but that’s because all the third-party candidates up until now have pretty much been Ross Perot. And if you are seriously comparing Ross Perot to Morgan Freeman, you are insane. Ross Perot and Morgan Freeman could not be different.

Morgan Freeman is a refined man with a classy, smooth baritone, and Ross Perot is an over-caffeinated elf that keeps asking people if he could finish when they aren’t even interrupting him.

FREEMAN IN 2012!!!

Do you like this story?

$this_cat_breadcrumbs = get_the_category(); $this_cat_name_breadcrumbs = $this_cat_breadcrumbs[0]->name; $parent_cat_id_breadcrumbs = $this_cat_breadcrumbs[0]->category_parent;