With the NFL season kicking off this weekend, the hottest topic of discussion is Peyton Manning's neck injury, which will keep him from building on his impressive streak of 208 consecutive starts. Word today is that Manning is currently undergoing neck surgery because his head is on the verge of falling off or something. Whatever. This is a movie site. Go somewhere else for sports news.

However, because we’re a movie/TV/entertainment site, we would be remiss if we didn’t use Manning’s misfortune to capitalize on the soon-to-be influx of Google searches on his name. So, let’s all send some positive vibes to Manning, hoping that he not only can regain his health, but return to the gridiron, where the guy is every team’s worst nightmare when he has two minutes left and the ball.

Vibes sent? Great. Now let’s appreciate Manning for his work off the field. No, not charity. That’s lame. His unique brand of deadpan comedy that has made him one of the most marketable athletes in the world.

9. Football Cops

Not his most inspired work, but it’s amazing how much comedic mileage simply slapping on a fake mustache and a police uniform can get you.

Big drawback here: Being paired up once again with Eli. Eli’s just not that funny. We get it. They’r brothers.


8. Priceless Pep Talks – Love Handles

Just because he’s being a dick doesn’t mean he’s wrong. Sorry, Jesse

7. Sprint Commercial

Hmm. We’re only three entries in and we’ve already got two that heavily rely on Peyton Manning wearing a fake mustache. I don’t care.

I apologize for nothing.

6. One of Many “Priceless” Commercials

“They’re not saying ‘boo’. They’re saying “mooooo-vers.”

See? He’s an everyman!

5. SNL Locker Room Skit

Peyton is terrified of a little competition. So much so that he is pissing his pants at the thought of getting back out there. He just wants to get the “eff out here.”

But the man can dance.

4. Peyton Snaps At His Center

This clip is hilarious for two reasons. Firstly, he goes absolutely APESHIT at center Jeff Saturday during a game, screaming at him for suggesting aloud that the Colts run the ball more. Secondly, the clip is re-examined by both Manning and Saturday, which is pretty awesome considering how far off the deep end Manning went. Manning essentially just shrugs and says, “Yup. That’s something I did.”

Not laugh-out-loud funny, but still on par with his funniest scripted moments. Once he realizes he was miked up during his rant, he kicks back and claims the moment was “better than Desperate Housewives.”

Hard not to like the dude.

3. Peyton’s SNL United Way Spoof

This proved to a national audience that Manning could be funny outside the context of a thirty-second commercial. In this clip, he plays wildly against type, berating kids and breaking laws under the guise of performing public service. Just…just watch it.

2. Peyton Manning Cheering On Absolutely Everyone

This second MasterCard commercial reverses the roles a bit and demonstrates Manning to garner enthusiasm for everything from gas-pumping to deli meat-slicing.

“Never gonna wash this hand!”

1. Priceless Pep Talks - Minivan

This is one of many produced by MasterCard, all produced under the guys that Manning is a lot more cocksure than his “gee-whiz” façade would lead us all to believe.

“Yeah, you’re feelin’ me.”