In Honor Of ‘The Hobbit': 4 Prequels That Work And 4 That Don’t

Wednesday, December 21 by


Star Wars: Episode 1 – The Phantom Menace

After years of rumors and hearsay, promises and planning, the movie event of a lifetime was upon us. George Lucas had finally finished his work on the first of three Star Wars prequels. The result: pretty terrible. Where the original trilogy got everything right, this prequel was woefully wrong from start to finish. Gone were the rich worlds that captivated a generation, and in their place we were given ham-fisted, contrived scenarios designed purely to sell toys and book covers. May 19th, 1999 will live on as the deathday for many a childhood.

Dumb and Dumberer: When Harry Met Lloyd

What do you do when the star and directors of a runaway hit have better things to do than consider a sequel? You recast with younger unknowns and hand the directing duties over to a couple chodes best known for Blink-182 videos. That’ll bring in the American Pie audience for sure? Still not certain? Bring in Eugene Levy. Horny teens can’t resist Eugene Levy.

The Exorcist: The Beginning

This is one of the best examples of a studio using a sniper rifle to shoot themselves in the foot. Morgan Creek dropped a reported $80 million to make this prequel… twice. The fear was that the first actually good version by Paul Schrader wasn’t explosive enough to draw in audiences. So, they turned to Deep Blue Sea helmer Renny Harlin to take a more Hollywood approach to the material. I don’t know what possessed them. **cool sunglasses-wearing emoticon**

X-Men: First Class

Everyone fell over themselves to rave about this past summer’s X-Men: First Class, but I don’t feel like it was justified. Yes, it did follow the underwhelming X-Men: The Last Stand and X-Men Origins: Wolverine and looks better by comparison. But it’s still one of the goofier pieces of turd to hit theaters this summer. What they should have done was go the Origins route and focus solely on Magneto. He was the only reason to watch this wretch. Do away with boring kid mutants, forced dialogue, and James McAvoy‘s unconvincing temple-touch everytime he needs to concentrate his power. He came off more like John Edward than a superhuman.

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