Everything I Know About Australia I Learned From Hollywood

Wednesday, January 25 by
AUSTRALIA! 

It’s Australia Day! Which means it’s time to show our gratitude to the great continent for all of their contributions in the global arena. We here at Screen Junkies have never had the pleasure of traveling Down Under, but find the prospect of doing so absolutely enticing. The only facts we know about Australia have been learned from watching hours and hours of film and television and staring at pictures of Australian actresses. Seems like a great place!

So, join us, won’t you? As we get to know Australia!

The Bad Guys Are Really Intimidating

If you thought we had a bullying problem in America. It’s a joke compared to Australia.

Did you know that Australia has to deal with roaming gangs of outlaw beserker bikers, neo-Nazi skinhead groups, and poachers? It’s true! I’ve learned that from films like Mad Max, Romper Stomper, and Crocodile Dundee 2. And those films can’t be lying. They were shot on film after all!

They’re All Gorgeous

Except for the intimidating mutant freak portion of Australia’s population, the citizens are uniformly gorgeous. Across the board. See the picture above? You may think that’s actress Isla Fisher, but it’s actually a coffee delivery girl in Melbourne. That’s right. They also hand deliver coffee. Australia is a wonderland!

Point is, you just trip over hotties in Australia. Don’t believe me? Proof here, here, here, here, here, and here. I have further proof if needed.

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