Sure, the notion of a BB gun is a little quaint these days in the era of Furbies and streaming pornography (I don’t really know what kids like these days), but it’s impossible not to let Ralphie’s infectious enthusiasm and wide-eyed wonder in A Christmas Story not get to you. If Red Ryder BB guns were a real product, they would sell like iPods. Also, eyepatch sales would be booming. I smell a Pirates of the Caribbean tie-in!
What better toy than The Toy, a character in a film of the same name, played by Richard Pryor? In the film, a spoiled boy is gifted Richard Pryor as his friend and jester. We should all be so lucky. I never had a Richard Pryor growing up, and it killed me. I would look at my window and see all the neighborhood children playing with their Richard Pryors, and just sob. I once came to school with a LeVar Burton, but kids can be so mean. So mean.
As seen in the 85-minute Nintendo commercial The Wizard, the Power Glove was a complicated, ineffective way to play Nintendo. And I was going to DIE unless I got one. What made this toy so much more desirable than many of the other entries on this list is that it was real. It was a total bust, as it really only worked with that silly game, Super Glove Ball.
But it was in a Fred Savage movie, and it was Nintendo, so I had to have it. I never got it, and am glad I didn’t now, but man my parents were mean for not getting that for me.