9 Movie Scientists Who Deserve The Nobel Prize

Monday, October 3 by
A visionary genius.  

It’s that time of year again…NOBEL PRIZES!!! After you stop urinating in your pants and hyperventilating, collect yourself and wonder what would happen if the Nobel committee wasn’t simply limited to boring real-world scientists, but could also comb through the far more interesting and advanced world of movie science.

They’d end up giving the following nine movie scientists awards, which I would suggest be renamed “The Goldblums.”

Chris Knight – Real Genius

He filled an entire house with popcorn and made it explode using the laser from an airplane. Since he usurped the laser from Professor Hathaway, Chris prevented the laser from being used as a militar weapon, which merits the Nobel Peace Prize. The fact that he blew up a house with popcorn is just the icing on the cake.

If Chris Knight falls out of contention, could the committee at least recognize Lazlo’s work out of a closet?

Doc Brown – Back to the Future Franchise

Sure, others in film have crafted time machines, but has any been as elegantly simple as Doc Brown’s DeLorean? It’s so simple that I can explain it to you right here:

  1. Enter in the destination time/date
  2. Harness 1.21 gigawatts (jigga who?) of power, presumably from a lightening bolt
  3. Have the energy power the flex capacitor
  4. Drive 88 MPH
  5. Have a nice day

Sure, he was the outcast of Hill Valley, but the man was able to recreate the experiment in 1985, 1955, and in the old west. Versatility has to count for something, right? Also, judging by his appearance in 1955 and then in 1985, he appears to have innovated some anti-aging ray that the committee would be eager to learn more about.

John Hammond – Jurassic Park

While not a scientist himself, John Hammond is no doubt a man of science, having proven to be the driving force behind InGen, the genetics firm responsible for the miracle that is Jurassic Park. The technology used in this film was fairly prescient, but the award should be tossed Hammond’s way if for no other reason than his dinosaur’s ate Newman.

I have it on good authority that the Nobel Committee is comprised of a number of Seinfeld fans, almost all of whom hate Newman.

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