7 Sequels Of Remakes Hollywood Felt Were Necessary

Wednesday, February 8 by

Halloween II

Uh-oh. Here’s where we get in trouble. With the nonsensical horror franchises. Was Halloween H20 a remake or a reboot? Would you consider the later films sequels or are those remakes of a remake?

My nose just started bleeding.

Fortunately, Wikipedia tells me (I’m not a fan of the genre, therefore don’t have this information stored) that the 2007 Halloween directed by Rob Zombie was a remake, and the film that came out two years later, Halloween II, was its sequel, also directed by Rob Zombie. How is this not a reboot?

I don’t know, ok? It’s just not. I’m tired, man.

Actually, Zombie claimed the 2007 film was a prequel and a remake, which is good enough for me.

Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3D

I honestly for the life of me can’t figure out if this thing is a reboot or a remake or a sequel or what. It’s like the Police Academy series, if the series started in the 70’s and had a different cast for every one. What the hell would you call that? A franchise I guess.

There’s very little cohesion between all these films, but they weren’t able to keep my interest long enough to conduct a thorough examination. Let’s count this franchise as one-half of an entry, just to hedge our bets.

The Hills Have Eyes II

The 2006 remake of the 1977 film I find to be successful in its creepiness and its insanely violent and gory context. The film made $41,000,000 in the US, and was met with average reviews, which, for a horror film, is like winning an Oscar.

The follow up, The Hills Have Eyes 2, came out a year later and was written by both Wes Craven and his son, Jonathan. Its reception can’t be considered anything other than poor, and we haven’t seen a follow-up in five long years.

It’s probably time to reboot the sequel of the remake. You know, in a gritty fashion.