7 Reasons Why The People’s Choice Awards Are For #ssholes

Favorite Movie Superhero

I can understand the need for this category. Superhero talkies are big business nowadays. What I can’t understand is how the win last night went to Ryan Reynolds‘ Head for Green Lantern. I’m sure his head turned in a wonderful performance, but nobody bothered to see that movie. And those that did walked away feeling cold and hollow. Personally, of all the nominees I would have given it to Chris Evans for Captain America.

Also, I’d like to look into how many of those votes came from Canada. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: Canadians aren’t people!

Favorite Web Celeb

Any category that validates Ashton Kutcher is not a category that should exist.

Repeated Maroon 5 Snubbing

Much like Martin Scorsese, Maroon 5 FINALLY took the honor of Favorite Band last night after years of repeated snubbing. Perhaps now they can return to their mansions happy in knowing that paying their eternal souls to that crossroads demon wasn’t a bad deal in the end.