7 Films That Didn’t Need A Re-Release

Wednesday, February 15 by

Santa Claus Conquers The Martians

I can recognize the value in celebrating this movie as a classic of kitsch cinema, but is it really worth watching without the running commentary from the cast of Mystery Science Theater 3000? I mean, this is a few hours of our lives we’re talking about, here.

All The Other Star Wars Movies

Really. Just stop. How many lunchboxes, pairs of underwear, bed sheets, sticker books, exclusive magazines, DVDs, fake tattoos, pencil boxes, and toys does George Lucas need to sell before he’s sufficiently crapped all over every childhood? It can’t be about money anymore at this point. He just doing it to mess with us.

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