6 Comic Relief Characters Who Weren’t Funny

Monday, March 4 by Lee Keeler

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Otis. Minnie. Hawkins. Just these names alone are annoying. We’re sorry to remind you of these six Comic Relief Characters Who Weren’t Funny. Enjoy?

Otis – “Superman” (1978)

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While Ned Beatty is a formidable talent as an actor, his inclusion in the early Superman franchise makes little sense. First of all, Otis isn’t even in any of the “Superman” comic booksand that includes all of the silver age Curt Swan dreck where Supes married a mermaid and that kinda crap. Otis is meant to play the bumbling foil to the “menacing” Lex Luthor, also played by the equally-squandered Gene Hackman. Superfail.

Minnie – “The Bride of Frankenstein” (1935)

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A favorite of the flamboyantly fabulous director, you can hardly find one of James Whale’s masterpiecesincluding “The Invisible Man”without Una O’Connor’s hysterics. Una had the unenviable task of balancing out the murkiest moments that Whale could deliver. In the grand old days of live theater, the caterwauling hag was meant to represent a lighter side; but in later cultural context her shrill presence simply reads as annoying.

Hawkins – “Predator” (1987)

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That creepy laugh that the Predator does? All Hawkins fault. If he hadn’t told Billy one of his awful p*ssy jokes, the tracker wouldn’t have bellowed out and the Predator wouldn’t have imitated him. It’s, like, the butterfly effect, man. Hawkins had to be the first to die because he was so obnoxiousbut he had the last laugh, because he was played by “Iron Man 3” co-writer and director Shane Black.

JarJar Binks – “Star Wars Ep. 1: The Phantom Menace” (1999)

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You know why.

Short Round – “Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom” (1984)

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Once again, we’re looking at a character whose quirks just don’t age very well. And once again, we’re looking at George Lucas’s dirty work. Lack of gerunds and grammatical savvy considered, Short Round’s depiction as a scrappy, hard-luck foreigner will one day be rendered totally racist and politically incorrect by people who don’t understand the cartoonish elements of pulp characters. Until then we’ll have to settle with him just being a pain in the wang.

Alexander Knox – “Batman” (1989)

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Robert Wuhl and Tim Burton, two comedic geniuses together at last! One can only ponder what lines of coke Robert Wuhl tripped over to land screen time in what is one of the greatest comic book movies ever made. By juxtaposition, his weird yuppie/baboon shtick makes Vicki Vale look that much more beautiful. Bravo, Wuhl and Burton!