Scare the Bra Off Of Them

Tuesday, July 5 by
Alien stuck to crew member's face 

Choosing scary monster movies to watch with girls is not only the perfect Saturday night activity, it’s also the perfect way to covertly put her in the mood without having to soil your HD flat screen with some sort of sensitive thinking person’s movie.  If you’ve ever watched a scary movie with a girl in your life, you know you can expect your lady (or ladies) to inch closer and cling tighter as the fear builds. If you’re lucky, you’ll have her in your lap by the time the movie ends, while having seen some darn good effects in the process.

 

Cloverfield

Rob and Beth talking to the camcorder

A perfect blend of two parts monster madness and one part sappy romance, Cloverfield‘s plot revolves around a massive creature of unknown origin as it ravages downtown New York. Instead of evacuating, a young man goes to rescue an ex-girlfriend with the help of some friends. Being a hero at heart he goes back knowing full well the monster still lurks the area. A word of caution, the director went with the “shaky cam” style of filmmaking—one or both of you may end up puking, unless you have a stash of Dramamine on hand.

 

Alien

Alien stuck to crew member's face

A spacecraft lands on a distant, unexplored planet to answer a distress beacon after which an alien creature boards their ship. While some may consider this to be a little too “old-school”, it still delivers the chills even if you have already seen it a few times. The H.R. Giger-designed alien is frightening enough, but most of the scares are delivered through Ridley Scott‘s masterful use of mood and atmosphere. Even if it is the “oldest” film on this list, Alien set the bar so high when it was release in the late ’70s that horror flicks today, in all their CG glory, still struggle to match its quality.

 

28 Days Later

Zombie on fire chasing Cillian Murphy

Most think 28 Days Later is a zombie-type flick. The truth is, the “zombies” are actually still alive, having been transformed into monstrous, bloodthirsty savages by a strange virus. The creatures roam the streets of England hunting down the few survivors who remain in the country. 28 Days Later is so frightening and so disturbing that there is a strong possibility it will be you that ends up inching towards your girlfriend as you watch in fear.

 

The Mist

From the mind of Stephen King, The Mist features a plethora of monsters that all but guarantees to give you and your girlfriend some major goosebumps. A handful of civilians are trapped in a local grocery store as a strange mist engulfs their entire town. The mist not only clouds the area it covers, it is also home to an unknown number of fiendish monsters. You may have to watch this movie at least once before watching it with a lady friend just so you know what to expect. The last thing you want to do is scream like a little girl in front of her.

 

Dog Soldiers

Werewolf in the woods in Dog Soldier

Last but not least is the 2002 British release, Dog Soldiers. A squad of special forces are training in the Scottish Highlands when they find the remains of another group of soldiers who had trained in the area. The troops then go into battle mode only to find that their adversaries are not men but werewolves. The movie does start slow but by the 30 minute mark, you and your girlfriend will be clinging to each other in mutual fear…which will hopefully lead to some other mutual activities.

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COMMENTS

  1. July 5, 2011 9:51 pm

    Anonymous

    The only movie that can match up to the original Alien is it’s sequel, Aliens.  Nothing else comes close.

    Event Horizon should have been on the list.  I haven’t seen Dog Soldiers, but it’s better than Cloverfield, The Mist & 28 Days Later.

    The Mist was highly predictable so I didn’t find it scary at all.  It’s more of an experiment of what happens when you mix different personalities and lock them in a stressful situation.  Basically Stephen King saying that people are idiots & these ones definitely were.  The last scene in the movie is the only good one.