Quotes from “Pineapple Express” are as off-the-wall as they are funny. In this 2008 movie, Seth Rogen stars as Dale Denton, a pot-smoking process server who goes on the run after he witnesses a murder. Though the plot deals with serious subject matter, the quotes in “Pineapple Express” are lighthearted and hilarious.
“Wow, you're a servant? Like a butler? A chauffeur?” – Saul As Dale’s drug dealer Saul, James Franco plays a major part in “Pineapple Express.” Saul and Dale spend time getting to know each other during the movie’s opening scenes. This quote comes from Saul’s attempts to understand Dale’s unconventional job.
“A cop, a lady and a guy!” – Dale Denton While he’s on the job, Dale witnesses a murder. In a panic, he retreats to Saul’s apartment, which sets the “Pineapple Express” plot in motion. Dale tells Saul what happened, and the two men flee the apartment in fear.
“Today’s my cat’s birthday.” – Red The best quotes from “Pineapple Express” come from Danny McBride’s character Red. He’s Saul’s supplier, and his personality is odd to say the least. Red’s quote about his cat is strange because there’s no evidence of a cat in his house.
“Look what I'm wearing. Kimono, dog. What're you wearing?” – Red When they first meet, Dale and Red don’t get along. Their first scene together in “Pineapple Express” is full of tough-talking bravado. In this quote, Red notices Dale’s suit and calls him out, even though Red is wearing some unconventional attire himself.
“How can I explain this to you differently? The battery is dead. It ceased to live. It's deceased now.” – Dale Denton While they’re on the run, Dale and Saul take refuge in a secluded area of woods. After attempting to formulate a plan for their immediate future, the pair fall asleep in Dale’s car. They wake up to a dead battery, a concept that Saul can’t quite grasp.
“Well, I don’t know, man. I think I’m functioning right now.” – Saul Throughout “Pineapple Express,” Dale and Saul’s pot-smoking habits always lead to boneheaded decisions. After spending a day in hiding and fearing for his safety, Dale becomes frustrated with the situation. He directs his anger at Saul, and this quote is Saul’s rebuttal.
“Well, that's easy. It's because we're not friends. You are my drug dealer.” – Dale Denton During their time hiding out together, Dale and Saul become more than just acquaintances. Dale’s frustration ends up getting the best of him, however, and this mean-spirited quote is the result.
“Dale Denton. Not Asian. All right, kill Red.” – Ted Jones As the ruthless drug kingpin Ted Jones, Gary Cole gets all the menacing quotes from “Pineapple Express.” Jones is Red’s supplier, and the main characters learn that Jones is also responsible for the murder that Dale witnessed. Jones has his thugs tap Red for information, then seals Red’s fate in this quote.
“Thug life!” – Red Even though he was shot by Jones’ henchmen, Red somehow stays alive. He hooks up with Dale and Saul, and the trio gear up for a final showdown with Jones. This “Pineapple Express” quote is Red’s attempt at toughness.
“I'm like the nerd at the sleepover who fell asleep at nine.” – Red As the character who sustains the most physical damage during “Pineapple Express,” Red seems to be getting beat up or shot during many of his scenes. This quote comes after he wakes up from unconsciousness brought by his injuries.
– Andrew Jett