Funny One Liners From Movies

Friday, April 1 by Sheldon Reid

These funny one liners from movies waste no time getting to the punch line. These quotes prove that jokes don’t have to be drawn out or elaborate. Sometimes it’s best to just keep it short and sweet.

  1. “Frankly my dear, I don’t give a damn.” Fans of classic movies should be familiar with this movie one liner. In “Gone with the Wind,” Clark Gable’s character graciously voiced his apathy. His words are in response to Scarlett O'Hara's heartbroken question, "Where shall I go? What shall I do?"
  2. “Last time I saw a mouth like that it had a hook in it.” Rodney Dangerfield was a comedy legend armed with plenty of snappy lines. He delivered this cruel one liner in the 1980 movie “Caddyshack." Dangerfield played the loose-lipped character Al Czervik who lets the insults fly during a formal dinner.

  3. “You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen, which doesn't say much for you.” Groucho Marx is remembered as an infamous master of wit. This one liner from “Animal Crackers” is just one example of his snappy humor. His character, Captain Jeffery T. Spaulding, hands a lady this insult just as he enters the scene.

  4. “Don't worry, I saw 'Lord of the Rings.' I'm not going to end this 17 times.” Fans of Robert Downey Jr. will tell you he is a witty actor who has plenty of experience with movie one liners. He delivered this line in the 2005 film “Kiss Kiss Bang Bang.” Downey's character, Harry Lockhart, says the line while narrating.

  5. “The ratio of people to cake is too big.” The movie one liner comes from the comedy “Office Space.” Milton, played by Stephen Root, addresses this common problem with parties. Unfortunately, he is still fails to obtain cake at the office party.

  6. “Every time I try to talk to someone it's 'sorry this' and 'forgive me that' and 'I'm not worthy'…” A one liner like this could only come from God. This quote is from “Monty Python and the Holy Grail.” God speaks these words before giving King Arthur his noble task.

  7. “It's hard to soar with the eagles when you're surrounded by turkeys.” A statement like this is both true and chuckle-worthy. Adam Sandler gave us this movie one liner in the 2002 comedy “Mr. Deeds.” 

  8. “Let me get this straight. Our father was romantically involved with a guy that could fit in his pocket and you're mad because he's white?” This line comes from the comedy "Death at a Funeral." Chris Rock pointed out the poor timing of his brother's racist comment. The line comes after a midget just revealed that their father was gay. 

  9. “Oh, I'm sorry, did In break your concentration?This line comes from Quentin Tarantino's "Pulp Fiction." Samuel L. Jackson offered this line, which is may not seem funny until you understand the context. Jackson's character, Jules, shoots a man during an interrogation scene. An easy way to break someone's concentration.

  10. “Charlie Chaplin once entered a Charlie Chaplin look-alike contest in Monte Carlo and came in third. That's a story.” These words are delivered by Bruce Willis playing Mr. Goodkat during a lecture in "Lucky Number Slevin." Is this claim true? Only partially.