Funny Christmas Movie Quotes

Tuesday, April 12 by Ryanick Paige

One of these funny Christmas movie quotes could be that quote you just cannot get out of your head because it is just so hysterical. Or it could be one of those ones that you just cannot believe others would find funny. Either way these funny Christmas movie quotes have been repeated over and over again by those who love them.

  1. From “Christmas Vacation” as said by Clark. “Hey! If any of you are looking for any last-minute gift ideas for me, I have one. I'd like Frank Shirley, my boss, right here tonight. I want him brought from his happy holiday slumber over there on Melody Lane with all the other rich people and I want him brought right here, with a big ribbon on his head, and I want to look him straight in the eye and I want to tell him what a cheap, lying, no-good, rotten, four-flushing, low-life, snake-licking, dirt-eating, inbred, overstuffed, ignorant, blood-sucking, dog-kissing, brainless, d***less, hopeless, heartless, fat-ass, bug-eyed, stiff-legged, spotty-lipped, worm-headed sack of monkey s*** he is! Hallelujah! Holy s***! Where's the Tylenol? “
  2. From “The Santa Clause” as said by Scott Calvin to Neil. “We shared a bowl of sugar, did some shots of brown liquor, played with my shot guns, field-dressed a cat, looked for women… [honestly] I read him a book! “
  3. From “Home Alone” as said by Kevin McCallister. “I took a shower washing every body part with actual soap; including all my major crevices; including in between my toes and in my belly button which I never did before but sort of enjoyed. I washed my hair with adult formula shampoo and used cream rinse for that just-washed shine. I can't seem to find my toothbrush, so I'll pick one up when I go out today. Other than that, I'm in good shape. “
  4. From “ELF” as said by Buddy to Michael. “Wow, you're fast. I'm glad I caught up to you. I waited 5 hours for you. Why is your coat so big? So, good news – I saw a dog today. Have you seen a dog? You probably have. How was school? Was it fun? Did you get a lot of homework? Huh? Do you have any friends? Do you have a best friend? Does he have a big coat, too?”
  5. From “Home Alone 2: Lost in New York” as said by Harry to Kevin. “Nothing would thrill me more greatly than to shoot you. Knocking off a youngster ain't gonna mean all that much to me. Okay? But since we're in a hurry, I'll make a deal with you: you throw down your camera and we won't hurt you. You'll never hear from us again. Okay?”
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COMMENTS

  1. April 12, 2011 9:34 am

    monkeymays

    Great list!!