‘Zombieland’ Quotes

Monday, August 22 by Frost

Movies with zombies end up either being frightening or hilarious, and humor reigns with these ten best "Zombieland" quotes lurching after you. Earnest meets macho, then gets hijacked by anti-social and runs over a lot of bodies on the way. Anything in the zombie apocalypse can be weapon, even laughs, so memorize these "Zombieland" quotes as your ammo

"You're like a giant cock-blocking robot." There's times when a flat delivery beats out all emotional contenders, and this is one of those times. There's no frustration, just a simple statement of fact that makes you laugh.

"Garfield, maybe." Bill Murray tells audiences what they were already thinking. Of all the movies he's done this one finally gets the acknowledgement of regret it deserves. "Zombieland" is full of that special self-deprecation humor.

"I've never hit a kid before but that's like asking who Gandhi is." Claim ignorance on whatever you want, but you can't forgive no knowing who Bill Murray is. "Zombieland" is a great introduction to his acting for the younger audience and was a great surprise to Murray's faithful followers. Harrelson's face is the same as if someone killed his family…again.

"I'm not easy to get along with, and I'm sensing you're a bit of a bitch." This is the quote you keep bringing out of your bag of tricks. A nice set up for the relationship between Tallahassee and Columbus to build on. Try to not bring this to bear the next time you pick up a hitchhiker.

"You go taken hostage by a 12 year old?" That's a question you don't want to be asked, especially by your zombie killing partner. "Zombieland" features enough reversals of fortune to make this possible, but it still smarts to the males and makes the females grin. Keep an eye on those kids with Nerf guns because they might be stepping up real soon.

"I've been watching you since I was like…since I could masturbate." A heck of a line when you have a millisecond to decide whether to wince or laugh first. Truer fandom has never been expressed. The worst part about this quote, is you start doing the math on when you actually first see Bill Murray.

"I'm not good at farewells so that'll do pig." If this didn't make you laugh, then you're dead on the inside. "Zombieland" kicks new life into that old line from "Babe" and slays with it. Lines like this are what make great movies.

"You wanna feel how hard I can punch?" Anytime you've got two guys there's going to be aggression. Now make it the last two guys on earth, possibly, and they're going to need to vent. Passive aggressive meets just plain aggressive and it's never been better.

"Thank God for rednecks." It's what Tallahassee and Columbus find that secures this quote as one of the best. It's not what you expect, much like the whole movie, and therein lies why it can be watched again and again. There's an old NRA slogan visual reference there too so watch "Zombieland" again if you missed it.

"You can't make yourself too available." Make the girl chase you, even if you're the last guy in her age range. Just because you're living in "Zombieland" doesn't mean you have to start wearing a sundress.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                     –Matthew Langenfeld

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