![]() 7 Awful Prequel Ideas & Their PostersPOSTED BY Jame Gumb | THURSDAY SEPTEMBER 17 AT 10:28 PDT
If there's one thing Hollywood loves to do, it's run an idea into the ground. And when it comes to squeezing every last dime out of a concept, sequels are the studios' weapon of choice. Shawshank Origins: Brooks Haven’t you always wondered about the mysterious origins of Brooks Hatlen, the librarian and resident "bird man" of Shawshank? No? Well screw you. That's what you're getting.
The Wrestler: Thunder in Paradise The Wrestler ended on kind of a downer. Let's remember Randy "The Ram" Robinson in happier times. I'm thinking Springsteen's Glory Days for the soundtrack, or maybe Pink Cadilac.
The Young Pluto Nash Chronicles Kids just love Webster! Kids love Pluto Nash even more! Combine the two, and you’re gonna make yourself a billion dollars!
Six (or 6ix) Before his family was brutally murdered in Se7en, Detective David Mills (Brad Pitt) was on the case with his smooth-talking street-smart partner, Darryl “Detroit” Donaldson (Martin Lawrence). This unlikely duo will have to set aside their differences in order to track down “Six” stolen crystals before an evil Asian drug kingpin summons the ghost of Genghis Kahn.
(I know this poster looks like garbage, but I couldn't justify spending any more time on a Martin Lawrence parody.)
My Big Fat Greek Uncle... My Big Fat Greek Wedding meets Sleepers. Look, Nia. The studio isn't going to greenlight anything without a Greek theme, so if you want a shot at a drama, this is your only chance.
Philadelphia: When Andy Met Miguel Before all the lawsuits, before all the AIDS, before the all the lesions... there was the romance.
Star Wars: Episode 1 - The Phantom Menace Let's take a prepubescent Darth Vader, pair him with a jive-talking CGI duck-lizard and put them both in the middle of an intergalactic trade dispute! Oh, they already did that? My bad.
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eh, maybe