General - Page 14

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, EMILIO ESTEVEZ!
Tuesday, May 12 by

Forty-seven years ago today, Emilio Estevez was brought into this world, and its destiny was changed for the better.  In your honor, Screenjunkies is digitally hanging this lovely Young Guns painting on our walls forever, or until the future predicted in Freejack becomes a reality and we can replace it with a hologram of Mick Jagger (image courtesy of artist and calligrapher Terri Alsobrook).Here are some free links, jack: Keyboard Cat Plays Himself Off (SickPigs)Every Man's Fantasy Comes True (Manofest)The Best TV Drunks Ever (Pajiba)Christina Stefanidi Is Spankin Hot (GorillaMask)Amazing Attempt At Human Flying (IAmBored)6 Movies Based On True Strories That Are Bullshit (Cracked)Christopher Lloyd Is A Piranha Expert (DreadCentral)Flowchart For Lying To Your Girlfriend (HolyTaco)Remember When Baseball Wasn't Messed Up? (BustedCoverage)Jeska Vardinski Is An Angel (Uncoached)American Gladiators MOVIE!!! (Unreality)New Doctor Parnassus Photo (ThePlaylist)

Kym Johnson
Tuesday, May 12 by

           

MEGA SHARK VS. GIANT OCTOPUS TRAILER EMERGES
Tuesday, May 12 by

Down below we have the trailer for Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus, the movie that dares ask 'What would happen if a giant octopus fought a mega shark?' The trailer features the colossal sea creatures attacking submarines, boats, oil rigs, jets, commercial flights, and San Francisco. And Earth's only hope is Lorenzo Lamas. *Sigh* Maybe it's not too late to strike some kind of deal with Giant Octopus.   Here are your other morning headlines: Hulu too good to be true. (NY Mag) Aziz Ansari calls out Digital IMAX. (/Film) MTV Movie Awards presenters announced. (MTV) Trek writers explain lack of Shatner. (io9) Where The Wild Things Blog (Latino Review)

Cheryl Burke
Monday, May 11 by

         

Monday Afternoon Link Dump
Monday, May 11 by

The 10 Coolest TV Characters Of All Time (Pajiba)Packers And Bengals On The Rebound (MoonDogSports)HumpDay Is All About Humping Chicks (FilmDrunk)London Harts Spank Bank (GorillaMask)5 Bastardizations Of Wikipedia (Cracked)Call Of Duty Movie? (Filmofilia)

BRAND NEW TERMINATOR: SALVATION PHOTOS
Monday, May 11 by

In an effort to further remove all suspense from Terminator Salvation, Warner Brothers has released 59 new photos from the upcoming release. I swear we'll have seen every frame of this film before it hits theaters. Anyway, I've decided to post the most surprising of all.Apparently we were fools to ever have trusted Vicki the Robot.See the rest of the pics at /Film.And here are some more morning headlines.As his star rises, Joel McHale's aspirations do not. (Cinema Blend) Common to be horribly miscast as B.A. Baracus? (Movie Hole)Willie probes ALF a la David Lynch. (Warming Glow)What the world needs more than anything right now is another dull and uninspired H2 poster. (Filmofilia)A LOST movie could happen. But probably won't. But it could. (Latino Review)

Friday Afternoon Link Time
Friday, May 8 by

This Guy Is The Best Shower Singer (FilmDrunk)Italians Rule The Blogosphere (MoonDogSports)Happy Mothers Day, Danzig Style (SickPigs)25 Sexy Female Mugshots (Manofest)I Wanna Be Captain Kirk (Pajiba)Sandy Scott Is Spankin Hot (GorillaMask)Pregnant Teens Dance (IAmBored)

STAR TREK IN THEATERS NOW
Friday, May 8 by

Of course the big news this weekend is that the J.J. Abrams-helmed Star Trek is playing in wide-release. Reviews have been glowing so far and the movie is sure to rake in the Earth bucks and be a smash hit. Finally! Thanks so much for making Trek sexy and cool. Now I can wear my Spock ears in public without the fear of getting a front-wedgie. Here are more morning headlines…WEREWOLF: THE SERIES finally coming to DVD!!! (Dread Central) Bruce Willis is Obsessed with Beyonce and lawn care. (NY Mag)District 9 teaser poster is not welcoming. (Yahoo)Mike Tyson sings! Please auto-tune. Kthxbai. (The Playlist) Sin City 2: City Of Sin in the works. (Latino Review)More MAD TV. God. Please, why?! (TV Squad) Happy Mother's Day! (THR)

‘STAR TREK’ OPENS AT 7PM, PEOPLE!!!
Thursday, May 7 by

  You want to see the new Star Trek, don't you? Don't you?!?! Ok then. Just Google 'star trek showtimes,' and pick from the lot. In the 25 mile radius of theatres around my house, Star Trek is being shown 89 times tonight between it's premiere at 7pm and the midnight screenings. Oh look–There's even a theater playing it every minute! Heck, why not avoid the costumed drunken Klingons and just see it at 3am tomorrow morning on IMAX? And what about you, Enterprise, AL? Or even you, 'Captain' Kirkland, WA? Bottom line, it's playing everywhere, all the the time. And it's going to kick ass. So get your damn tickets already (they're going fast).KHAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNN!!!!!!!In preparation for tonight's festivities, read our review of the film, or check out some Trek video delights after the jump:

DMX With A Bazooka Morning News
Thursday, May 7 by

io9 has uncovered a few clips from the awfulsome direct-to-DVD movie, Lockjaw. I've embedded one of the scenes below. It features DMX fighting a voodoo-created snake-alligator using only his wits and a bazooka. That synopsis is pretty much the tattoo that I was planning on getting. Just watch it already.Lockjaw – Watch more Funny VideosBill Maher uncovers the Susan Boyle sex-tape. (TV Squad)   Kiefer Sutherland probably still drinking. (National Ledger)   Rambo shirt will get you killed everywhere except Mexico. (Cinematical) Ninja trailer looks pretty all right. (Cinema Blend) Whatever Works poster highlights LD's junk. (First Showing)

SUCK ON MY SINATRA!
Wednesday, May 6 by

Give em Hell Malone Cannes Trailer – Watch more Funny VideosCheck out the Cannes trailer for Thomas Jane and Ving Rhames in Give 'em Hell, Malone, a Dashiell Hammet-inspired detective flick directed by Russell Mulcahey, who also helmed The Scorpion King 2, Resident Evil: Extinction and AC/DC: Family Jewels. The shameless title of this post is in reference to a character's line at about 1:54 in the clip, a line that has already solidified its place on a tee-shirt and bumper sticker somewhere, I'm sure. Frightening Star Trek Fans (Manofest) Lucy Pinder poses nude with Wolverine claws.  (FilmDrunk) Supreme Court Nominee Effects Sports Law (MoonDogSports) Jenna Lee Fox Business Network Interview (WallStreetFighter) Frank The Tank Joins 'Neighborhood Watch' (Pajiba) Misty Dawns Spank Bank (GorillaMask) Awesome Star Wars Wedding (IAmBored) 10 Popular Porn Scenarios (Cracked) Transformers 2 News (filmofilia) Clash Of The Titans Set Pics (DreadCentral) Office Etiquette Instruction (HolyTaco) Kentucky Derby Bikini (BustedCoverage) Snow Monkeys Are Too Human Like (Uncoached) Ryan Reynolds Is DeadPool (Unreality) What To Do If You Notice You're On Fire (TomOatmeal) Doctor Parnassus Screens In L.A. (ThePlaylist) Dude Fails At Carnival Hammer (NothingToxic)

Strike A Robo-Pose Morning News
Wednesday, May 6 by

There are new Transformers 2 one sheets up over at Yahoo. The posters feature battle-damaged Optimus Prime, Bumblebee, and Starscream. Coming soon to a movie theater lobby or nerd's bedroom near you! Big Dork has a big dork in MTV's new Hard Times. (Hollywood Reporter)Dom DeLuise has shuffled off this mortal coil. (Empire)Deadpool spin-off! A spin-off of a spin-off? That's the movie equivalent of thinning the gene pool. (Latino Review)Sam Rockwell is the brains. (The Playlist)Will Ferrell is watching you. (First Showing)

PUNISHER & EMINEM JOIN FORCES IN ‘ULTIMATE MARVEL CROSS-MARKETING PLOY’
Tuesday, May 5 by

Well, it was inevitable, really.  The Punisher is teaming up with Eminem in an all new Marvel comic book.  Read more about it at FilmDrunk, who actually had something insightful to say about it, unlike us.  We just laughed like a schoolgirl thinking of the inevitable in which Eminem can get challenged to battle lyrically, then win because the guy with the twin uzis, trenchcoat and the skull painted on his shirt is standing behind him without his knowlege.  Crowd pleaser!!!And while you're at it, check out these other peoples' insights about stuff and things and more stuff.Supreme Court Listens To Janet Jackson (MoonDogSports)The Best Of Keyboard Cat (SickPigs)Kate Beckinsale Is Hot (Manofest)RP Dom DeLouise (Pajiba)A Corset like Pirates of the Caribbean, but on a dude, and on ice (With Leather)Abby M's Spank Bank (GorillaMask)Homemade Wolverine Claws (IAmBored)Instruction Manuals For The Enterprise (Cracked)More on Wolverine 2 (Filmofilia)Unborn Official Art (DreadCentral)Celebrity Autobiographies We'd Like To See (Holytaco)Celtics Fans Can't Hold Their Booze (BustedCoverage)Charity Hodges Is Also Hot (Uncoached)Trekkies Bash New Star Trek (Unreality)

Turning Japanese Morning News
Tuesday, May 5 by

Hugh Jackman will be heading to Japan. After kicking the hell out of Matthew McConaughey and the swine flu this past weekend, a Wolverine sequel has been announced. Empire reports that the sequel to the spin-off will focus on the Yakuza storyline from the comics. But I would much prefer to see Wolvie square off against a penis monster or a chimpanzee on a Segway. Ha! Ha! Ha! That chimp thinks he's people!!The nominees for the coveted 2009 MTV Movie Awards have been announced. (Cinema Blend) Nicolas Cage runs over New Yorkers. (MTV) NBC unveils more crappy shows. (Reuters) A child rapping? That will be the day! (The Playlist) Fringe renewed for second season. (TV Guide)

Zoe Saldana
Monday, May 4 by

          

‘SHADOW HARE’ TO TOP BOX OFFICE IN 2013 IF YOU ARE AN EXTREME OPTIMIST, OR SHADOW HARE
Monday, May 4 by

If the studios ever run out of comic book properties to adapt, maybe they should take their creative execs on a retreat to Cincinnati for inspiration.  Check out this video of "The Shadow Hare," the Queen City's resident masked vigilante.  "Since when has Cincinnati had one great hero?" asks Shadow Hare.  I don't know.  Maybe Neil Armstrong.  Maybe Steven Spielberg.  Maybe Ulysses S. Grant.  All crime fighters in the Cincinnati area before they were famous.  Only Spielberg was captured on film, though. See more at SickPigs Other junk you will like if you are into movies or learning something new whilst masturbating: Giant Gallery o' Kate Beckinsale (Manofest) Megan Fox ogles own cleavage in mirror (Film Drunk) This is how you celebrate Star Wars Day (Holy Taco) Scarlett Johanssen directs Kevin Bacon in "This Film Will Never See The Light of Day" (Pajiba) Rebecca Miller has inordinately large fake breasts (Gorilla Mask) The Ball of Yarn That Attacked San Francisco (I-Am-Bored) Angels & Demons Poster Will Not Have Fart Sound FX as Planned (Filmofilia) Avatar rehearsals in the rainforest?  Add $10 million to the budg, Fox! (Filmonic) Kevin Costner should make biopic about this gold diggin' baseballer (BustedCoverage) The porn version of Stallone's 'The Expendables' has been cast (Uncoached) Please don't let this be Sam Worthington in Avatar (Unreality Mag) Man dies attempting idiotic stunt (Nothing Toxic) Hottest Crazy Women on Film (Chickipedia)

Best Worst Movie News
Monday, May 4 by

Below we have the new trailer for Best Worst Movie, a documentary that tells the poignant tale of a movie that sucks nards. Enjoy! Best Worst Movie Trailer from Best Worst Movie on Vimeo.via CinematicalKatie Cassidy and Clancy Brown move to Elm Street. (Latino Review)Ben Stiller adopts Nigerian. (Cinema Blend) The Tarantino Mixtape. (/Film)Hugh Jackman sees dead people. (Coming Soon) Save Sarah Connor or we all get robo-fragged. (io9)

ALL RIGHT! ALL RIGHT! ALL RIIIIIGHT!!!
Friday, May 1 by

The 10 Hottest Matthew McConaughey Movie Babes (Manofest)Elaine Alden Should Join The SeX-Men (Gorilla Mask)Documentary legitimizes Troll 2 as the high art is is (FilmDrunk) Terminator 5 to take place in the present? (Unreality Mag)This Pussy's Ready to Box (Sick Pigs)Jedi mind trick used to interrogate suspects (MoonDog)Help A Charity, Win Tickets to American Idol (Jesus Tits)Jennifer Garner Stars With Sweat From McConaghey's Balls (Pajiba)15 Insane Mug Shot Tattoos.  No Unicorns, Surprisingly (Uncoached)German Infomercials are 'der sh*t' (Holy Taco)Guide to the Vagina Is Excellent Documentary (I-Am-Bored)Twitter war between Chase Daniel & Radio Host (Busted Coverage)Lego Girls Want to Show You Their Boobs (Unique Daily)The further adventures of George Washington Carver & his Nuts (Tom Oatmeal)Michael Bay would never do something this stupid (Nothing Toxic)

Revealing Morning News
Friday, May 1 by

USA TODAY has an exclusive first pic from the eagerly-anticipated Iron Man 2. The still shows Tony Stark in his lab with a handful of Iron Man and War Machine suits. But wait, what is that in the background? It's blurry but I think that's a Wonder Woman costume. Looks like Robert Downey Jr. is up to his old tricks. Cobra attacks France in new G.I. Joe trailer. 57 mimes killed. (Empire) T-Pain joins live action Aqua Teen Hunger Force; has World's Greatest Career. (NY Mag) Development of Arrested Development movie arrested. (MTV) Crispin Glover is all kinds of time travelly up in this piece. (Cinema Blend) The Evolution of Chuck Norris. (Cracked)

NEW ‘SPAWN’ MOVIE SPAWNS A BUNCH OF LINKS
Thursday, April 30 by

According to FilmDrunk (via IESB), Todd McFarlane is working on a new Spawn sequel.  You could read the original article, but Film Drunk's take on it is a lot fartier.  Check it out here, and then read every single one of the articles via the links below, so you can tell all your friends that you know everything cool that has happened today.  Yes, with these links, you can command the conversation.  With these links, people will like you.Zillow could be used for everything (Holy Taco)Marvel Comics Films – Worst to Best (RottenTomatoes)10 Sexiest World of Warcraft Characters OF ALL TIME! (Manofest)5 Cocktails, 5 Movies – 1 Great Article (Pajiba)55 Photo Tribute to BUSTED TEES GIRLS (Manofest)Spank Bank: The Woman Known as Kerrie (GorillaMask)A-Rod Has Bitch Tits Courtesy of ILM (SickPigs)Why Last Night's Lost was bullsh*t (UnrealityMag)Arrested Development News Develops (The Playlist)Tony Stark's Mansion Should Look Like One of These (Uncoached)Sports Illiustrated Swimsuit Model Bar Rafaeli (BustedCoverage)6 Ways That PORN RUNS THE WORLD!!! (Cracked)Danny Huston joins Clash of The Titans as Poseidon (Filmofilia)

Morning News Breadcrumbs
Thursday, April 30 by

Adam McKay and Will Ferrell have picked up a pitch from Dead Snow director Tommy Wirkola. Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters picks up 15 years after the traumatic events that befell the siblings in that too-good-to-be-true Gingerbread House. "The idea is, they've grown up and they hunt witches," McKay said. No cast has been announced but I expect to see Danny McBride or Jack McBrayer in lederhosen very soon. (Hollywood Reporter) Wolverine's multiple endings spoiled. (io9) Gremlins 3? (Bloody Disgusting)Roger Rabbit 2? (/Film) Clueless 2? (Cinema Blend) Jim Jarmusch steals a dude's diary. (NY Mag)

‘THE BOAT THAT ROCKED’ IS NOT JUST ANOTHER NAME FOR DAVID LEE ROTH’S YACHT
Wednesday, April 29 by

The Boat That Rocked Trailer – Watch more Movie TrailersOther Links You Might Like:JJ Abrams Taking on the Dark Tower after 'Lost'? (Unreality Mag) A Romantic Comedy About Ass Burgers (FilmDrunk) Llama Attacks Reporter (Manofest) Meryl Streep & Amay Adams Wrestle In Butter (Pajiba) Spank It All The Way to The Bank with Michelle (GorillaMask) Tampon Prank Ends Badly (I-Am-Bored) 6 Famous Characters You Didn't Know Are Shameless Rip Offs (Cracked) Funny New Posters from The Hangover (Filmofilia) Falconheart is North Ohio's Sickest Motivational Rock Band (SickPigs) The Relationship Translator Should Be Will Smith's Next (HolyTaco) Conan The Commentarian – Hilarious (UniqueDaily) Angelina Jolie's Fur (Celeb Vine) Playboy Cyber Girl Breann McGregor (Busted Coverage) Sarah Jessica Parker Looks Like the Dude From Real Genius (Uncoached) The King of Kong saga continues… (The Playlist) George Washington Carver's Nightmares Should Get Optioned (Tom Oatmeal) Deranged Russian Soldier On Supermarket Killing Spree (Nothing Toxic)

Sword Fightin’ Morning News
Wednesday, April 29 by

Michael Bay and McG have been feuding these last few months over who's robot movie will rule the box office this summer. But now /film reports that McG has taken it to a new level. He wants to measure one another's ding-dongs in a public forum. Really, McG?? I expect that kind of thing from Brett Ratner but not from you. Reached for comment, Bay responded, "My boom stick is legendary. Sometimes I use it to floor the accelerator on my Hummer. Talk about horse power! BOOM!" Transformers 2 trailer leaks online and probably on John Turturro as well. (Cinematical) Steve Carrell is being blackmailed. (Cinema Blend) You will not be laughing at Marlon Wayans on purpose this time around. (Latino Review) Ridley Scott is out of ideas. (IESB)Expendables set footage. (Empire)

technorati test post
Tuesday, April 28 by

Technorati Profile

REMEMBER TOM GREEN? NO MATTER. CHECK OUT THESE LINKS ANYWAY.
Tuesday, April 28 by

Remember Tom Green at UnrealityBenicio Del Toro Is Brett Easton Ellis (FilmDrunk)The Japanese Piss Kids (SickPigs)99 Hot Hooter Girls (Manofest)Russell Brand Should Die (Pajiba)Sarah Collins Spank Bank (GorillaMask)OMG! JESUS! (IAmBored)Michael Bay Breakfast (Cracked)Don Johnson Directs Porn Now (Filmofilia)Get Eaten By Piranhas? (DreadCentral)Target Job Application (Holytaco)Mark Sanchez Banging Chicks (BustedCoverage)Christie Cavelli Gallery (Uncoached)Lars Von Triers AntiChrist (ThePlaylist)

I Must Break Into You Morning News
Tuesday, April 28 by

The Daily Mail reports that armed robbers recently bound and terrorized Dolph Lundgren's wife after breaking into the family's home. However they fled once they realized exactly from whom they were stealing. It is unclear if the thieves left due to fear of ice cold vengeance or due to the almost non-existant resale value of Dolph Lundgren movie memorabilia.Clues surface about Wolverine leak. I think those responsible live in a cold climate. (io9)Mr. T vs. The Nazis. Nice knowing ya, Hans. (Cinema Blend)Baxter Stockman and his Mousers might make their big screen debut. (/film) King of Auto-Tune returns to Soundwave role (UGO) Titans begin their Clash. (Latino Review)

EVA MENDES TOPLESS IS IN VOGUE
Monday, April 27 by

Yep, it's a bad pun, but I made you look.  The next issue of Italian Vogue has a racy spread with several photos of a very topless Eva Mendes (who they make out to have some kinda foot fetish, too).  Leave it to Italian Vogue to get the scoop over their American counterparts.  It's the sort of twist that really makes me want to see Italian Hitch, Italian Stuck On You and Italian We Own The Night.  You couldn't drag me to Italian Ghost Rider, though.  Not with all the naked Eva Mendes in the world.  Check out the photos below, and while you're at it, visit some of Screenjunkies' link friends.                              Trailer for The Skeptic is why Inside the Actors Studio airs (FilmDrunk)Spike Lee Denies Rift With Kobe (MoondogSports)Whoopie Goldberg Talks To Dinosaurs (SickPigs)Tony Danza Is Just Way Too Cool (Manofest)Plenty Of Hustle And No Flow (Pajiba)Keira Knightley Is Hot (Filmofilia)Heidi Watney Upskirt Pics (BustedCoverage)Christa Cavelli's Spank Bank (GorillaMask)Susan Boyle Makes South Park (IAmBored)The Saddest World Record Attempts (Cracked)Zombie Marriage Counseling (DreadCentral)The Difference Between Swine Flu And A Trip To Mexico (Holytaco)Allison Stokke Is A Hottie (Uncoached)Terminators PG-13 Rating Isn't So Bad (Unreality)Alexander Desplat Scores Twilight Sequel (ThePlaylist)The Molls Show (TomOatmeal)The Hottest Movie Fighter Girlfriends (Chickipedia)Punched In The Skull (NothingToxic)

Tribute to Bea Morning News
Monday, April 27 by

We report with great sadness that TV Land has lost one of its greats. Bea Arthur passed away quietly over the weekend at the edge of 86. Best known for her work on Maude and The Golden Girls, Arthur was an undeniable presence in American sitcoms and an unmistakable influence on popular culture. Miss Arthur, we salute you. If we weren't so lousy with ropes the flag outside of our offices would fly at half-mast today. Ghostbusters: The Game opening cinematic kinda expository (/Gamer) A Trekkie's tale (Newsweek)Natalie Portman launches online film school (MakingOf.com)Überprüfen Sie das Filmposter für Brüno! (/film)Get ready for another 30 Days of Night (MTV)

FIGHTING CREATES SAD FACES
Friday, April 24 by

Fighting Makes Sad Faces (FilmDrunk)55 Scandalous Barbie Photos (Manofest)Lets Shag Ass! (Pajiba)Becky B's Spank Bank (GorillaMask)Hilarious Egg Genie (IAmBored)5 Retarded Superstitions (Cracked)Robert Rodriguez To Direct Predators (Filmofilia)

Morning News That Will Cut You
Friday, April 24 by

Fans of excessive knife-based violence rejoice!! The web is abuzz with reports that Robert Rodriguez is bringing a feature length Machete to the big screen with filming set to begin as early as June. The film stars Danny Trejo as a double-crossed assassin on a vengeance mission. Rodriguez is set to co-direct with his longtime editor Ethan Maniquis. No word yet on which director has final cut. Ha-cha-cha-cha!!Full story here (Empire)NBC trims Heroes show order. (TV Guide)  Stephen Sommer's G.I. Joe movie has super suits. Set disbelief to 'suspend'. (io9)  Very cool Star Wars paintings. (/film) Anna Faris reaches her sexual qouta. Dang it!! (Pajiba)  Burning Down The House: The Story of CBGB opens at Tribeca Film Festival. (MTV)