We would like to thank all of our readers for joining us on this incredibly special night. Here are some final thoughts on the evening, particularly the dominance on Slumdog Millionaire.
@Michael_bay: Highlight of the evening? My Hummer has Lamborghini doors.
Philip Buster: It’s clear: Oscars finally outsourced as economy crashes.
Matt Sears: Mickey Rourke is gonna choke-slam someone at the Vanity Fair Party.
Max Powers: The academy is cleary Lactose-Intolerant with their snub of ‘Milk.’
@Michael_bay: Who let catering on the stage?
Philip Buster: Slumdog Wins. Impoverished Indians to eat their hearts out, literally. NOTE: All these people live together.
Matt Sears: What happened, did CalTech have a fire drill? Where are all these computer programmers come from?
Max Powers: And now, a Slumdog sweeps up the theatre.
@Michael_bay: Gay man beats up Wrestler. News at 11.
Philip Buster: Ben Kingsley could beat the crap out of all of these guys. Because he fights dirty.
Matt Sears: Sean Penn loses himself in every role. And his wallet in every strip club.
Max Powers: M-I-C-K-E-Y R-O-U-R-K-E. Mickey Rourke. MICKEY ROURKE. Come sing along with our club in perfect Har-Mo-Ny. Dude got robbed. That’s Bullshit.
@Michael_bay: Woah, he really did beat the crap out of Rhiana…wait, that’s Sophia Lauren/
Philip Buster: If you’re nervous, just picture them all without their clothes on.
Matt Sears: The Spice Girls look weird.
Max Powers: Sophia Lauren is done. Someone take her out. She looks like fine Italian leather.
@Michael_bay: I’d Reese her Withespoon if you know what I mean.
Philip Buster: Somewhere, Ryan Phillippe is beating it like a gavel.
Matt Sears: …to his own reflection
Max Powers: Best Cinnabontography — Queen Latifah.
UPDATE: Queen Latifah pours out some salad dressing in Paul Newman’s memory.
@Michael_bay: You shouldn’t have to read while you watch a movie.
@Michael_bay: Where can these Indian kids safely store their awards?
Matt Sears: Slumdog is sweeping. Which is surprising to me. I liked Dark Knight but it’s getting beaten worse than Rihanna.
Philip Buster: That’s funny. Right now in Mumbai, somewhere, a slumdog really IS sweeping.
Max Powers: Was that an Indian Peter Gabriel?
@Michael_bay: My Best Original Score? It involved Angelina and Salma Hayek on top of a mountain in Laos. BOOM
Max Powers: So Did mine!
@Michael_bay: No it didn’t.
Max Powers: No it didn’t.
Matt Sears: Why do Indian guys dress like the Matrix when they win awards?
Philip Buster: I’d like the Key’s to Alicia’s pants.
UPDATE: EDDIE MURPHY STOLE AN OSCAR AND IS HOLDING IT HOSTAGE WHILE TALKING ABOUT SPECIAL CHILDREN.
Matt Sears: $10 says Jerry Lewis refers to "Milk" as ‘that homo movie’
Max Powers: Sadly due to the digital conversion, none of Jerry Lewis’s fans can watch him accept this prestigious award.
@Michael_bay: That’s what an Indian looks like? Im confused. Good for Moby.
Matt Sears: It’s difficult to edit out all those flies on poor-kids-eyeballs scenes.
Philip Buster: Best Flim Editing: Drumslog Millionaire.
Phillip Buster: Indians haven’t mixed that soundly since curry and rice.
Matt Sears: Boom Goes The Dynamite.
@Michael_bay: BOOOOOOOMMMMMM. Come on, I win this category every year.
Matt Sears: Is Rambo up for an Oscar?
Philip Buster: Four old white guys who took a white guy and made him look old. Congrats.
Max Powers: Has anyone seen these?
Matt Sears: Why did they give the award to high school art teacher?
@Michael_bay: Documentaries? Seriously? Those are not actually considered movies, are they?
Max Powers: Bill Maher’s suit matches his hair. What? I just won the oscar for shittiest comment of the year? RAD.
Matt Sears: A documentary about Bill Maher is not complete without swearing at hookers.
Philip Buster: Bill Maher? He’s the thin man’s Michael Moore. That’s not a compliment.
@Michael_bay: I’ve been wondering why Heath hasnt been taking my calls.
Max Powers: When did Cuba grow hair?
Matt Sears: Walken’s bow tie is crooked.
Philip Buster: Is Heath Ledger ‘Supporting’ the ecosystem? Yes he is. PS Hoffman, you look like a criminal.
THIS JUST IN: ZAC EFRON IS DANCING. AND SINGING.
@Michael_bay: Hugh Jackman should stick to punching things with knives.
Max Powers: DANCE PARTY.
Matt Sears: It is now permissable to masturbate to musicals. Thank you Oscar for breaking down that wall.
Philip Buster: Wow. Beyonce looks Fabulous. A tall drink of sex appeal that Zac Effron has NO idea what to do with. Like a dog with a bicycle. You know what I mean.
@Michael_bay: I buy my weed from Seth Rogen.
Max Powers: I buy my weed from @michael_bay
@Michael_bay: No you don’t.
Max Powers: No I don’t.
Matt Sears: An east german who’s bald and wears all black? Somebody call Guiness. We’ve got a record.
Philip Buster: Personally furious that "Hamster On A Piano" was disqualified for this category. Fking politics.
UPDATE: Seth Rogen and James Franco are impersonating the staff of Screenjunkies.com.
@Michael_bay: It’s great that there’s a category for best camera-holder. Im being sarcastic right now.
Max Powers: Finally, Slumdog is getting the recognition it deserves.
Matt Sears: They made a tv studio look like an ominous cave. Obviously they’ve never been to a live taping of The View
Philip Buster: Cinematography in a Mumbai ghetto. That’s like turning on a flash bulb in a meat-locker basement. Anyone can do that.
THIS JUST IN: News flash. Oscar’s tribute to youth and beauty. They’re really taking a risk here folks. Stay tuned.
Matt Sears: I paid tribute to romance earlier today in the park and I got a ticket.
Phillip Buster: They should just do a self-love tribute. Like a giant mirror that lowers in front of the crowd. Then people can start stroking their beautiful, chiseled faces.
Phillip Buster: Wow. They made Brad Pitt look old, then hot. Here’s your Nobel Prize.
@Michael_bay: THE DUCHESS? Someone puts a dress on Keira and they win?
That’s like putting a sleeve on a pencil.
Max Powers: Australia will be shut out. It couldn’t even win Best Movie Set in Australia.
Matt Sears: Marisa Tomei should win Best Costume for The Wrestler.
Philip Buster: Daniel Craig can’t read. He’s either drunk, or British (which mean’s he’s drunk).
@Michael_bay: Not enough explosions.
Max Powers: Art dir-whatshion? Who’s this Art guy?
Matt Sears: Good job painting stuff you guys.
Philip Buster: Weird. They got an Oscar. Bush didn’t get shit when he let New Orleans get shredded off-camera.
@Michael_bay: I haven’t forgiven the Japanese for Pearl Harbor. A lot of people havent forgiven me for Pearl Harbor.
Max Powers: Awesome, some Japanese that America kind of understands.
Matt Sears: Lavatory – Lovestory Starring Larry Craig. That would have won. But seriously, this guy is wicked french.
Philip Buster: The title’s longer than the movie. Kato-San. You are my favorite animated short.
@Michael_bay: Jennifer Aniston’s career needs to be re-animated.
Max Powers: Oh, Bay, calm down.
Matt Sears: I heard that Wall-E had an epic meltdown on set.
Philip Buster: Wally’s more lifelike than Aniston. For my money, I believe HIS eyebrows.
@Michael_bay: Again, writing has nothing to do with movie making.
Max Powers: I was a Slumdog. Still am, kinda.
Matt Sears: Frost Nixon: Ron Howard’s best screenplay since Splash. Must hurt to lose.
@Michael_bay: This is a category? Screenwriting has nothing to do with movie making.
Max Powers: From now on I want tina fey to read all my movies to me.
Matt Sears: Tina Fey’s dress looks like the one that Joan Riversbot wore in Spaceballs.
Philip Buster: Wall-E. Because there no words.
Philip Buster: Spain hasn’t stolen that much gold from us since the Spanish American War.
@Michael_bay: I’ve done her.
Max Powers: I have not done her.
Matt Sears: Woody Allen did her.
Philip Buster: Yo la tengo!!
BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS
@Michael_bay: Tilda Swinton ate my dog. Raw.
Max Powers: I want to make best supporting babies with Penelope Cruz.
Matt Sears: Tilda Swinton is a shoe-in for Best Android.
Philip Buster: We’re praying that those strapless dresses hold.
@Michael_bay: I can wrestle.
Max Powers: Ok, we’re through the opening music number. Now I really love movies.
Matt Sears: Those props suck. Did Michel Gondry Swede the oscars? Put down the cardboard Mos Def.
Philip Buster: He’s classy like 36Mafia. I like his tooth.
@Michael_bay: I can sing better than Hugh.
Max Powers: Hugh Jackman doesn’t have metal claws?
Matt Sears: Billy Crystal looks REALLY good.
THIS JUST IN: Famous people are talking to gay reporters about all sorts of things, particularly just how amazing it is to have this opportunity to be talking to a gay reporter while being famous. Some people are excited. Other people are proud of Mickey Rourke.
@Michael_bay: Kiddie Pool filled with Cristal: Check.
Max Powers: People are wearing clothing. Fancy clothing.
Matt Sears: Wouldn’t mind seeing those golden globes. The ones on Jessica Biel.
@Michael_bay: What’s a Blog?
Max Powers: Its like CNN but on the computer.
Matt Sears: Blog was nominated for best picture.