Gary Busey is an enigma wrapped in a conundrum, elegantly paired with a fetching scarf of just-plain-batshit-crazy. Every morning, he dusts his balls with a talcum of nutjob powder. Then, he goes out into that big world of Hollywood and just starts blowing people’s minds. Here are a few of our favorite Gary Busey moments.
UPDATE: Talk about crazy; Gary Busey named his penis “Big Wednesday”, for some reason.
UPDATE: We track Busey’s progess on “The Celebrity Apprentice.”
UPDATE: Who would you rather be stranded in the woods with: Gary Busey or Nic Cage?
Summing it ALL Up
I’ve watched this twice now, and I understand. The ocean is a spirit. It is a sail on my boat of life. The Golden Rule pushes my spirit into a double rainbow. Thank you, sir. Thank you.
“That’s the way I like it…To be ambitiously hospitable and to meet people.” Best line ever.
If Gary Busey gave a four-hour lecture on personal development at a local Ramada Inn, I would pay upwards of $400 to see it. I would sit there totally confused, but also totally captivated, for the entire thing.
It has to be fun to live inside that big, blonde-hair-covered head of his. I bet all of the voices get together on weekend nights to drink serotonin and play some sort of limbic system version of poker.
Hunting Jennifer Garner
Ryan Seacrest is made out of the same shit as those Peeps Easter candies that nobody likes. And yes, Seth Rogen and Jonah Hill are intentionally hanging around to watch Busey make everyone uncomfortable.
This reinforces my theory that Busey devours a half-pound of mushrooms every morning and washes them down with a shot of liquid LSD. So awesome.
Ditching the Slurpee
The line, “Yeah, but what about the person drinking it,” just kills me. It shows how, amidst all the crazy, Busey is really capable of making broader points in creative ways. Seriously, what about the person drinking it?
Having Trouble Understanding The Question
Having watched a bunch of these, I realize that there are times where you just can’t tell if he’s simply being a dick or if he IS just totally batshit crazy and does not understand normal people.
Explaining Its Going To Be 3-D
You do it BUSEY’S WAY, or you GET THE FUCK OUT. It’s going to be in 3-D.
Spraying Swedes With A Hose
What I like about this one is that the dudes give him shit right back. That’s the way it should be. Busey is trying to lure people into a game of crazy wits. Most people just can’t hang, and then he devours them.
Questioning The Money Changers
Did you know that BIBLE stands for ‘Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth’? This guy is fucking with him. That takes balls. The mouthing is amazing. This whole thing is just hilarious.
Injecting It With Victory Juice
These are just too easy. I want some victory juice. I want a Super Soaker full of it to spray on all my friends.
Explaining Why He Was Late
The crazy thing is that I have used this excuse VERBATIM for years. I just never sold it right. The man has a point. Cats can fuck with your socks.
Mr. Busey, keep them coming. We know you will.
Check out this video of the Meatloaf/Gary Busey Meltdown.