Thanks to New York City and its shoebox-sized living spaces, the entirety of my DVD collection is crammed into boring black binders. The cases have long since been recycled into smart cars or whatever the hell it is plastic gets recycled into. But not every DVD case is so easily thrown out. These cases are like little pieces of art..only more useful.
Masters of Horror: Season 2
A plastic skull full of DVDs is pretty cool, but you have to be a real horror freak to buy the Ultra-Limited Edition, which comes in a real human skull. OK, that’s not true, but if you’re creepy enough to search and find out if it is, you’re probably on some kind of government watch list. Gotcha!
Northern Exposure: The Complete Series
Each individual season of this dry ’90s comedy came in a cute little sleeping bag, but for the complete series Universal stepped their game up and put all the discs into a swanky fake leather messenger bag. Of course they also stripped out all of the original music from the show due to licensing issues, but hey, at least it’s easy to carry.
Blade Runner: Ultimate Collector’s Edition
I’ve always wanted to have a brief case, but as a professional man of liesure, I’ve never needed one. But if I were to buy one of these individually numbered Blade Runner collections, I would carry it around everywhere. I would also proudly display the included origami unicorn and replica of the spinner car, even if it meant never getting laid again. And it almost certainly would.
The Big Lebowski: 10th Anniversary Limited Edition
At only 23 bucks on Amazon, it’s one of the cheapest things on this list, but it’s also one of the least dorky. The disc doesn’t have much by way of extra features, but it comes in a miniature replica bowling ball that you can throw at your friend and break after you’ve had seven too many white Russians.
Mad Men: Season 1
I’ll admit that I haven’t gotten around to watching Mad Men yet–I only have two eyeballs, people–but the oversized Zippo DVD packaging still looks pretty cool. Unfortunately, the whiners on Amazon seem to be doing a lot of complaining about it being cheap and prone to scratcing the discs, but those guys would complain about a machine that cost one dollar and gave unlimited handjobs.
Planet of the Apes: The Ultimate DVD Collection
To watch all of the crap contained on the DVDs in this set, it would take you almost 27 hours, but it only takes a second to realize how awesome it is that it comes inside of a monkey head. Peronsally, I’m holding out for another 15 years when they release an edition like this for Tim Burton’s version that comes with 20 DVDs packed inside a bust of Mark Wahlberg.
The Simpsons Molded Faces
When they first released season six in the aweome Homer packaging, people were actually getting angry because the package didn’t fit perfectly with the rest of their DVD sets. The uproar was so great (and annoying) that the studio offered people normal packaging for free by mail. That will teach them to try to do something cool.
Evil Dead and Evil Dead 2 Book of the Dead Editions
Now that Sam Raimi has announced that Bruce Campbell is in for another go around as Ash, these might actually be hard to get in a year or two. The rubber "skin" on the outside of the book actually feels kind of creepy, especially if you’ve spent as much time covering books with human skin as I have.
Bubba Ho-Tep: Hail to the King Edition
Get ready for it: I don’t like Elvis or his music. But I am big fan of Bubba Ho-Tep and I think the DVD version pulls off the rhinestone jumpsuit better than that fat ol’ redneck ever did. Plus, it’s another Bruce Campbell flick and you can never have too many of those in your DVD collection. Unless, of course, you count Spiderman 3. Those DVDs should be taken out into the desert and buried next to all those E.T. Atari games.
Phantasm: Limited Collector’s Edition
I remember when this movie came out the poster used to freak me out. Of course I was a little kid and had to close my eyes during Beetlejuice, but that’s beside the point. How cool would it be to have a DVD set that might eventually fly over and claw your brain out while you’re sleeping? Unfortunately, this set was only available as a region 2 import and has since gone out of print so getting one might require you to murder a few people. Or pay a slightly elevated price. It’s up to you, really.
Alien Quadrilogy 25th Anniversary Alien Head Set
Of course, it was only available in Region 2 (Europe, western Asia, etc), but when it comes to nerdy DVD boxes, this is by far my favorite. All the discs fit neatly inside the alien’s head which will surely scare small children and pets half to death. Plus, it drools real acid that can melt through tables and stuff. Not really, but how cool would that be?
Here are a few DVD packages that suck worse than the crap printed on the discs.
Whether you’re talking about the original series or the Next Generation, they all come in flashy plastic boxes. That would normally be fine, but you shouldn’t really be trying to draw attention to the fact that you have a large collection of Star Trek DVDs.
Soap and What’s Happening Complete Series
The packaging is just the first on a long list of things that suck about these collections, but when you buy a DVD set and all the discs comes stacked on top of each other, you should immediately know that you’re getting screwed on the deal.
Sliders Seasons 1 and 2
This one has more crappy foam that’s notorious for scratching up the DVDs when you continually take them out of the package. People are really watching Sliders multiple times? I didn’t know there were that many unemployed people.