stallone

Paramount must realize the colossal turkey they have on their hands with G.I. Joe because now they're trying a new marketing approach... targeting dummies. A few weeks ago they directed their efforts on the Jersey Shore , now the LA Times is reporting that the advertising is focusing heavily on mid-America. The film is apparently embedded in the Kid Rock concert tour and advertising on giant screens in the Mall Of America. The message of this campaign being, it is your patriotic duty to see this movie. All right, fine. I love my country so I'll see this movie. Even though the post-traumatic stress will probably leave me a shell of my former self.

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According to Variety, Hollywood is making yet another family film with animals that's sure to rake in millions.  The Zookeeper, starring Kevin James and Rosario Dawson, centers on zoo animals trying to teach the keeper their method of dating and mating to help him win back the woman of his dreams.  Cher's voicing a giraffe, Jon Favreau a bear, Sly Stallone a lion, and Judd Apatow an elephant.  If the film sticks to a realistic portrayal a great deal of the advice is going to involve forceful sexual advances.  In the animal kingdom, "no" doesn't mean no.  When Mr. Lion is horny he takes what he wants.  But surely if Kevin James persists there's going to be a HILARIOUS moment where a woman knees him in the balls.