Malin Akerman

You're a big fan of some Hollywood celebrity. You want to learn more about their private lives. And Us Weekly's "Stars: They're just like us!" section stopped being riveting after you found out Christian Slater drinks Starbucks. 

You want to learn the dirt… the real dirt… but you don't want to have to root through the celeb's trash bins for goodies. All that usually gets you is a bunch of hot garbage and a night in jail where hot garbage smell is an aphrodisiac for your cell mates. 

Well, thanks to the internet, you can now just hack into her Netflix account. After all, sometimes a DVD rental queue is much more telling than a heap of old groceries, anyway.

Couples Retreat is sponsoring Break Media this week, so I’m going to go ahead and describe the film as a hilarious look at real world problems faced by married couples.

But when it comes to looking at the real world problems of married couples, not all films are so friggin' hilarious.  In fact, some movies might just ruin your crappy marriage!

If you ever want to get married, or you‘re already married and want to stay that way, I recommend you avoid these seven films like Bryan Singer avoids vagina.

(Click on the posters to watch each movie's trailer.)

Private Parts