jj abrams

Whether Mr. J.J. Abrams likes it or not, Zoe Saldana refuses to keep her pretty little mouth shut about the Star Trek sequel, unofficially titled Star Trek: Uhura's Quest for Spock's Nuts. Yay for all of us! She said Abrams, Alex Kurtzman, and Roberto Orci are all still working on the script, and that they'll probably be going into pre-production around this time next year.

It's just pre-production, people. That means they'll start making drawings of how they want the shiny sets and costumes to look. Then once they decide how many whatevers should hang from the whatever, they have to make those whatevers a reality. Someone will probably get injured during construction, which will cause a delay, and during that time J.J. will realize there's a huge plot hole in the script. I expect to see the Star Trek sequel in 2015. (MTV)

J.J. Abrams is getting back in the saddle to direct the pilot for his television project Undercovers over at NBC. Not since the jaw dropping pilot for LOST has Abrams taken a seat behind a camera that's in front of a set constructed specifically for a small screen airing. 

The top brass is being very ellusive on the plot of the show, only saying that it's a mix between Mr. & Mrs. Smith and The Bourne Identity. Hmmmm, two spy movies? When you take two things that are pretty much the same thing it's not really a mix. That's like blending katsup and marinara, cutting it with tap water and calling it reimagined buttered noodles topping. Or in my household: dinner.   

[THR]

Why? Why, why, why, why?! JJ Abrams, you had a chance to put the amazingly buxom Diora Baird in a tastefully revealing bra and panties and you decided to NOT put Diora Baird in said lingerie. Do you need to replace the lenses in those stylish black frames of yours? The woman is a ten and you decided to go with a woman who is not Diora Baird:

For shaaaaaaaame. Chris Pine and Diora might have had amazing chemistry, but now we'll never know because a robot could have played the role below. Hmmmm a robot Diora Baird... Now there's something that shouldn't have creeped into my imagination. [Topless Robot]

Those two crazy cats are at it again.  Tom Cruise and J.J. Abrams have decided to bring Ethan Hunt back for a fourth round of explosions, high-wire acts, and elaborate MacGuffins.  According to Variety, Sumner Redstone and Cruise are in the process of mending fences so they can play in the same Paramount sandbox again.  It's amazing how the prospect of money heals all wounds.  As far as Abrams' involvement, he's not attached to direct this installment of M.I. because he's working on a kickass sequel to his kickass Star Trek reboot.  But hopefully soon enough we'll again be hearing Cruise scream "Red light! Green light!" as specks of spittle fly from his mouth. 

While talking with HitFix, Nicolas Cage eschewed the rumors that he hired a Voodoo Priestess to remove a curse from the set of Sorcerer's Apprentice. Of course he didn't hire a voodoo woman to remove a curse from his set. He hired her because she has the best weed.

Check out these other morning headlines...

Just because Tony Kaye wants to direct Mickey Rourke's script doesn't mean that Tony Kaye will get to direct Mickey Rourke's script. (The Playlist)

Ed Helms really yanked his tooth for The Hangover. (Cinema Blend)

JJ Abrams set to produce Mission: Impossible 4: The Impossible Mission. (/Film)

Todd McFarlane is delusional. (MTV)

Hilarious book Ghosts/Aliens to be adapted into kinda-alright Comedy Central series. (Dread Central)

England loves our poop. (io9)

NEW District 9 trailer. (Pajiba)

Star Trek officially opens tonight and Mother's Day is Sunday.  How appropriate, then, that we introduce you to Jennifer Morrison, who plays Winona Kirk, the mother of Capt. James Tiberius Kirk, in JJ Abrams' film.  There are several different backstories associated with the character, but no matter what reality you buy into as a Trekker, you can't deny Jennifer's practically playing the mother of god. 

Where you've seen her before: She's probably most familiar as Dr. Allison from Fox's "House" series, but she's also played Jamie in Grind, Amy in Urban Legends: Final Cut, and Chris in a small 2004 film called Mall Cop, whose makers probably hate their lives right now.

Random Quote: "My resume for Cameron has me graduating medical school the year I graduated junior high.”

See pictures of Jennifer after the jump:

“Star Trek” has been lying on the emergency room table for a good 10 years now, finally flat-lining with the ultra-flop “Nemesis” back in 2003, and then being confirmed dead when the pitiable TV series “Enterprise” was cancelled in 2005.  After having overcome cancellation, diminishing box office returns, and an increasingly maligned mythology only taken seriously by hardcore fanboys, “Star Trek” looked like it had finally breathed its last  Enter JJ Abrams, who has retooled, rebooted, and re-energized this franchise into a slick, hip, action-packed and character-driven summer blockbuster that will bring in much-needed new fans and please plenty of hard-to-satisfy Trekkies.  The hardcore fans won’t be happy, but then again, are they ever?