girl gallery

Carice van Houten is a Dutch stage and film actress. She looks great both with and without clothes in Paul Verhoeven's Black Book. It's clear that Verhoeven appreciates a stellar rack, and Carice is no exception. Don't worry, I think she's a fine actress, too. I'm not a COMPLETE pig.

A word from Carice: "I have seen Hollywood, and although I have nothing against it, it's not my kind of life."

You're clearly not doing enough illegal subtances when you're in town. The glitz and glamour become a lot more appealing with some booger sugar up in ya.

Appreciate the Dutch more after the jump.

Alice Braga first came to America's attention when she starred as sexy, tan Angelica in City of God. She then went on to fight CGI zombie things with Will Smith in I Am Legend. I'd take Brazilian drug dealers over poorly rendered CGI villains any day.  

A word from Alice: "I love my country, but I'm not very Brazilian at all."

Yeah, you're right. Your butt could be bigger.

More pics of Alice's Brazilian form after the jump.

Brie Larson sings some songs that I think tweens listen to while sipping virgin pina coladas, but you may better recognize her as the angsty daughter on The United States of Tara. Her character is a bratty teen who I want to slap in the mouth and send to her room. Then I silently stifle the quiver of excitement that rushes down my spine.

A word from Brie: "I feel so much better just being comfortable with myself and hopefully girls will accept that."

Quit letting your publicist whisper jibber jabber in your ear and just inject those toxins in your face already.

Brie is all natural (so far) after the jump.

Juno Temple is a British actress who's done a lot of British stuff, including Atonement, Notes on a Scandel, and probably Jude Law. What?! She's legal and he's Jude Law. 

A word from Juno: "I think it’s one of the worst things you can do… take away a child’s innocence."

Uggghhh, you're layin' it on kinda thick. I think Jude gets it. He's not going to change.

More not so innocent pics after the jump.

Rachael Harris has made guest appearances in a ton of TV shows, including "Reno 911" and "The Sarah Silverman Program." She also played Ed Helms' bitchy wife in The Hangover. She's funny, cute, and has a sexy librarian thing going on when she wears glasses. 

A word from Rachael: "Maybe because I’m an improviser and I was ready for anything that he was going to bring."

And she rolls with the punches. What more could you ask for? I'm pretending she's talking about gettin' freaky, and not acting.

More sexy librarian pics of Rachael after the jump.

Meghan Markle was case #24 on Deal or No Deal. She's been on 90210, Fringe, and CSI:NY, but I'm sure nothing compares to holding a metal briefcase for Howie Mandel.

A word from Meghan: "I was case #24 on Deal or No Deal."

That kind of experience can get you hostess work at Bennigans.

More winning pics of Meghan after the jump.

Emilie de Ravin is best known for her role as Claire on Lost, and saying "Chawwwliee" in a really annoying tone of voice. She's a sexy Aussie though, so she gets more slack from me than I usually reserve for people who yell words strangly.

A word from Emilie: "If you are lucky enough to find the right friends and places to hang out on, there are fantastic pockets in L.A."

Especially at the corner of Hollywood and Vine. The hookers are extremely cordial.

You're lucky enough to get more pics after the jump.

Jasika Nicole plays the lab assistant to Joshua Jackson's batshit crazy father in the FOX television show Fringe. She is also an illustrator and has created an autobiographical online comic called "High Yella Magic." I'm unaware if centers around tripping the light fantastic. 

A word from Jasika: "It's been almost three years since I learned how to ride the subways without getting lost or getting stuck in the closing doors."

Awww, you poor, poor dear. When that started happening to Grandma my Pa sent her off to a farm. I'm pretty sure that means he shot her.

Respect Jasika for her body AND her mind after the jump.

Lindsay Sloane was Maid of Honor at the wedding of Sarah Michelle Gellar and Freddie Prinze Jr. QUITE the accomplishment I might say. She also made an appearance on Entourage, but nothing tops standing next to Gellar as she made the mistake of marrying Fred from The Scooby Doo Movie.

A word from Lindsay: "I am so incredibly hot."

Whoa, pump the brakes. Clearly you're more attractive than me, but Alice Eve makes everyone else look like Alexis Dziena.

More definitely worthwhile pics of Lindsay after the jump.

Alice Eve is my new favorite thing on the planet. That's right, I like her even more than dogs dressed up as bananas. Alice is getting her first starring role as the 10 in She's Out Of My League, but you may also know her from a little film called Crossing Over. I'm not saying you've seen the film, I'm just saying you've Googled the words "Alice Eve Crossing Over."

A word from Alice: "There is an acting gene that has been passed down to me by my parents. It's nature, not nurture"

There are a couple of other traits that must have been passed down as well. A couple of fine, fine traits.

Check out more of Alice's good genes after the jump.