Dancing with the Stars

A blast from the past! A middle school fascination. A reason to "borrow" periodicals from the local Walgreens. Kathy Ireland used to be the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition it girl, and now she dances the mambo on television for charity dollars. Let's hope that money goes to the kids whose fingers bleed as they sew together the items in the Kathy Ireland Worldwide Catalogue.

A word from Kathy: "At the moment of conception, life starts."

I'm not touching that one with a ten foot pole...

Here are some Pro-Licious pics after the jump!

Who gives a twirling sh*t if Joanna Krupa can dance? I certainly don't. Hey ABC, get a pole up on that stage and watch your ratings skyrocket. Joanna is one of the sexiest woman alive, which is clearly evident by the aurora borealis of "daaaaaaaaaaaaaamn!" above. No tap shoes required. 

A word from Joanna: "I get so sick of wearing lingerie for shoots that I don’t even go to Victoria’s Secret"

Lingerie is overrated anyway. Nothing always works. Or bath bubbles. Personally, I prefer the Robocop brand of liquid suds. 

You have ten seconds to comply with the pics after the jump.

Network: ABC

Host: Tom Bergeron

Synopsis: Celebrities partner up with professional dancers and compete against each other in weekly elimination rounds to determine a winner.

Today's Dancing girl is Ukrainian Karina Smirnoff, who joined "Dancing with the Stars" in Season 3, and has... stayed on the show ever since. (If you've been following this series of galleries, you may have picked up on a trend.)  The closest Karina ever came to winning was in her inaugural season, during which she partnered with Greg Louganis impersonator Mario Lopez.   This season, she'd been cutting a rug with Apple founder Steve Wozniak, but was sadly eliminated  in the fourth round when she got lost in the rug that is Wozniak's beard.

Pointless Quote: "I just kept smiling, but it hurt."

Check out the photos of Karina after the jump, or these other Dancing with the Stars Chicks: Cheryl Burke, Julianna Hough, Kym Johnson

Today's dancing girl is Julianne Hough, a Utah native who came to "Dancing with the Stars" in Season 4 and promptly won that season's competish with her partner, Olympian Apollo Anton Ono.  In Season 5, she partnered with Helio Castroneves and did the double, becoming the shows' only other back-to-back winner besides Cheryl Burke.  She's also a Country music recording artist with a Mormon background, which might explain why she's using the American flag to conceal herself from heathen eyes in the photo above.  Or she's just the sexiest patriot alive.  Move over, Tom Brady. 

Random Quote: "Oh I wish you could love yourself, the way that I do." - From her song, "Love Yourself" off her self-titled debut.

CHECK OUT THE PHOTOS OF JULIANNE AFTER THE JUMP, or these other Dancing with the Stars Chicks: Cheryl Burke, Kym Johnson, Karina Smirnoff

Today's dancing girl is Kym Johnson, who came to "Dancing with the Stars" in Season 3, and has been with the show ever since.  The Aussie has never won, but has twice come in as first runner up with partners Joey Fatone and Warren "QBK" Sapp.  She was partnered this season with comedian David Alan Grier, whose Comedy Central show "Chocolate News" unfortunately had a shorter run than one of his and Kym's Paso Dobles. 

Random Quote: "I'm not the least bit high-maintenance."

Check out the photos of Kym after the jump, or these other Dancing with the Stars Chicks: Cheryl Burke, Julianna Hough, Karina Smirnoff

Well, a ton of TV shows are about to cool it for the summer, but Screenjunkies wanted to heat things back up a little, so this week, we're honoring our favorite dancing girls from this season of ABC's "Dancing with the Stars." 

Today's girl is Cheryl Burke, came to "Dancing with the Stars" in Season 2, and has never left, becoming the show's first two-time champ with partners Drew Lachey and Emmitt Smith (in Seasons 2 and 3, respectively). 

Random Quote: "I want kids or women out there to realize you don't have to be anorexic to be beautiful. There's a lot of pressure living this Hollywood life."

Let this be a lesson to everyone.  You don't have to have an eating disorder.  You just need to dance non-stop. 

Check out the photos Cheryl after the jump or these other Dancing with the Stars Chicks: Kym Johnson, Julianna Hough, Karina Smirnoff