Avatar

^{"That's a huuuge bitch!!!!"}

There are conflicting reports about Avatar's final pricetag. Cameron and crew insist that the film cost $230 million but the New York Times guesses that it will top out around $500 million after marketing costs. At any rate, that's a lot of scratch. Is it even possible for the film to make back its money? Even if you factor in die-hard Cameron fans, the Christmas crowd, and Michelle Rodriguez's relatives, it still seems like kind of a stretch.

But don't worry. FOX has a plan. The studio is going to release Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeekquel (because chipmunks squeek?) one week after Avatar's release. Sound plan FOX. If at first you don't succeed, show them your sh*t-eating chipmunks. (io9)

Avatar Trailer - Watch more Funny Videos

Literally five minutes after we posted the international trailer for Avatar, Yahoo went and posted the domestic one in HD like a bunch of cocky biatches. I apologize for the name calling, Yahoo. You are not cocky biatches... I'm just a lazy biatch.

If you like versions of trailers that are sharper, louder, and have less Elvish subtitles in them, than you're sure to prefer this one over the grainy one the foreigners have to watch. And don't you dare call me xenophobic. In Pandora, the blue cat Rastafarians think of xenophobia as a synonym for love.

Ride these links like a hybrid pterodactyl dragon!

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The Internet has been subsisting on a grainy bootleg version of the full-length Avatar trailer for nearly a week. Well, those days are behind us. Though the domestic trailer is not due to debut online until tomorrow, America has, much like the evil Marines in the film, raped Thailand of their international trailer. Are we sure this is Thai? The subtitles look more like Elvish or the frosting trim on a gingerbread house.

Anyway, Avatar opens on December 18th and is about dinosaurs eating army men. What are your thoughts? Do you plan on seeing Jim Cameron's 3D Rumble in the Jungle??

Sorry for the crappy bootleg version, but it's the best quality that exists online right now. You'll have to go to the theaters this weekend to see a better version of this three-minute Cliff's Notes epic on the big screen. Then... AND ONLY THEN... can we fairly judge the film's entire worth. 

Finally the long national wait for the actually good Avatar trailer is over. Coming Soon (tee-hee) reports that a 3 minute and 30 second trailer featuring a hefty amount of story will premiere in theaters this Friday. No word yet on which film it will be attached to but this is said to be THE trailer. The most epic, shart-inducing, nipple-tingling visual feat ever rendered. The film is set to open in less than two months so expect a huge marketing push for this one. In other words, it's about to get Avatarded in here.

Shut-ins and bubble people sadly will have to wait until Thursday, October 29th to view the trailer online. Damn! That's not nearly enough time to hone and perfect the intricacies of my CCH Pounder Halloween costume.

^{CLICK ON PHOTO TO SEE COMIC}

Playboy and Quentin Tarantino have teamed up to create a comic strip adaptation of a scene from Inglourious Basterds with reports that the director hand-picked and edited the piece. Here's the scene in the director's own words, "Okay, so. The Basterds come upon this Nazi and he's like this real bad Von Trapp-hating motherf&*%er, y'know? So. And then Brad Pitt's all like, 'Listen David Hasslehoff. I's Aldo Raines and I didn't come all the way to Germany for the strudel. We's in the Natzi-killin' business and we's here for your scalp. Today the hills ain't alive with the sound of music, Colonel Clink-looking motherf%$^ker. They's alive with the sound of killin'.' So. Y'know? (*pause; grows quiet*) May I have another Orangina please, Scott?"

SIDENOTE: It wasn't until just now that I realized comic book Brad Pitt closely resembles loveable drunkard Andy Capp.

And enjoy these glourious morning links...

Fellow Junkies,

Comic-Con has come and gone, as has Screen Junkies from San Diego.  It was our first ever trip down to Comic-Con and it will not be our last, but we learned a lot.  Mostly, we learned that you have to surrender to the fact that you can't cover EVERYTHING at Comic-Con.  Here's everything we DID cover:

AVATAR
Video clips of James Cameron speaking about AVATAR just moments after having unveiled 25-minutes of the film to Hall H @ Comic-Con. 

Alls I gots ta say is... let's get Avatarded in here!  We just got out of the AVATAR press conference with none other than James Cameron, and raced back to a quiet place so we could squeal like schoolgirls... and upload these videos of the visionary director talking earnestly about his project.  

The huge news revealed today is that on August 21st - "Avatar Day" - select movie theaters and online outlets will be screening 15 minutes of the film for FREE.  That's how confident Twentieth Century Fox and Cameron must be about their product.  In fact, rumor has it that Fox head Tom Rothman cried like a baby during the screening in the San Diego Convention Center's Hall H*.

* Not true.

So settle in and enjoy Mr. Cameron wax on about his little movie. 

PART 1:  Cameron on the film's character design.

In the past seven years we've seen a glut of Asian movies remade on our shores. Some of them fantastic, others craptastic. Well, now it looks like the shoe is on the other foot. The Playlist reports that House of Flying Daggers director Zhang Yimou is remaking the Coen Brothers classic Blood Simple in his homeland of China.

I hope this does well and leads to more retreads on foreign soil because I personally would love to see a Japanese version of Goodfellas. How great would that be? All the gangsters would dress like Elvis and gesture wildly like Lenny and Squiggy.

"What's that? You think I'm clown? I amuse you, hound dog?"

Oh my God. This film needs to be made. Somebody get Japan on the phone.

Perhaps I can interest you in these other morning headlines...

Avatar footage screened at Cinema Expo. Jaws subsequently dropped. (THR)

David Fincer to SuperPoke filmgoers. (First Showing)

Joseph Gordon-Levitt: "GI Joe is about the acting." (NY Mag)

Transformers scribes discuss the nuts and bolts of ROTF. (io9)

Sigourney Weaver on Ghostbusters and Alien sequels. (Cinematical)

7 Nagging Inconsistencies in Back to the Future. (Nerdist)
 

Director: James Cameron

Cast: Sam Worthington, Sigourney Weaver, Michelle Rodriguez, Zoe Saldana, Giovanni Ribisi

Synopsis: A group of humans are confronted by a distant planet's native population, forcing them into battle

Genre: Action/Science Fiction

Release Date: December 18, 2009