"You're prettier than that."
Netflix Also Added Some Pretty Great Movies, But No One Wants To Talk About THAT
Sunday, January 5 by

You can be a little excited about this. I SAID A LITTLE!

It will eventually happen, and it will be as silly and nonsensical as this image.
Fox ISN’T Planning ‘X-Men’ Vs. ‘Fantastic Four’ Movie. RIGGGGGGHHHHHHT.
Friday, January 3 by

I wish they would just take the plot of ‘Reality Bites’, and remake it with superheroes.

Put your hands down, you big showboat.
‘The Wolf Of Wall Street’ Sets Record For Use Of The Ole’ F-Word
Friday, January 3 by

Man, the networks are going to butcher this when they air it.

Tony Stark got a little richer.
The 10 Highest-Grossing Films Of 2013
Friday, January 3 by

Two non-remakes, non-adaptations, or non-sequels grace the list.

You're not gonna charm your way through this one, Rob.
Robert Downey Jr. Wants To Put Jodie Foster And Mel Gibson In ‘The Avengers’
Thursday, January 2 by

I don’t understand it, either.

You're not fooling anyone, "tough guy."
Tim Tebow To Remain In Our Lives As An ESPN Analyst
Tuesday, December 31 by

Pay attention, Jeremy Lin.

Netflix Is Getting Rid Of 100 New Shows On January 1. Happy New Year.
Tuesday, December 31 by

You can just assume your favorite shows are getting the axe.

Careful, Stephen. That's sharp!
Here’s Stephen Colbert’s Cameo In ‘The Hobbit’ Sequel
Monday, December 30 by

I just call it “the sequel” because I don’t want to type “Smaug.”

He's no Steven Segal. Even with that greasy hair.
Let’s Talk About The Films That Tanked Over Christmas
Monday, December 30 by

We need to balance out all the heartwarming Christmas stories with some bad news.

What's the opposite of a 'Duck Dynasty' "controversy?" Jennifer Lawrence taking her shirt off.
BREAKING: There’s Nothing To Talk About Today But ‘Duck Dynasty’, So We’re Not Going To Talk About Anything
Thursday, December 26 by

The more people want to talk about ‘Duck Dynasty’, the more it makes me want to shut down and be harder to reach, like Matt Damon in ‘Good Will Hunting’.

Well, "hello" back at you.
Keanu Takes Hardline Stance Against Starring ‘Point Break’ Remake
Tuesday, December 24 by

It’s “Jonathan” Utah now.

It's a back tattoo, possibly tribal.
‘Divergent’ Clip Fills A ‘Twilight’-Shaped Hole In Our Hearts
Monday, December 23 by

In the future, personality tests determine your fate. Just like in Scientology.

GIVE US THE LLAMA! WE DEMAND THE LLAMA!
Someone’s Trying To Sabotage Lana Del Rey’s Oscar Chances
Friday, December 20 by

This mystery person is doing God’s work.

Tom Cruise after Brad Pitt described the Beastie Boys "Sabotage" video to him.
Tom Cruise And Brad Pitt To Pair Up Again For ‘Go Like Hell’
Thursday, December 19 by

Is it 1995? Will there be an Aerosmith ballad on the soundtrack?

Here's Palin meeting with some visiting dignitaries (Sarkozy, perhaps?) on what appears to be a rural goodwill mission.
Sarah Palin Supports Suspended ‘Duck Dynasty’ Star, Doesn’t Know Exactly What Free Speech Is
Thursday, December 19 by

I’m sure free speech would have been taught at the VIce Presidential Boot Camp, had she gotten the nod.

Not pictured: James Westphal, Dr. Kenneth Noisewater
‘Anchorman’ Took In $8 Million Last Night, Will Do Just Fine At The Box Office
Thursday, December 19 by

Go f*ck yourself, America.

The proceeds will go towards buying beige umbrellas for inner-city theaters.
AMC Theaters’ IPO Lets You Buy A Share Of Stock For The Same Price As A Ticket
Wednesday, December 18 by

It’s not intentional, their tickets are just really expensive.

This lawsuit is at least twice as big as the size demonstrated here.
Frank Darabont Is Suing AMC, Big Time
Tuesday, December 17 by

In legal parlance, it’s what’s known as a “big time” lawsuit.

Get back to the editorial offices of the New Yorker, you fop!
Paul Feig, Not One To Upset Apple Carts, Is Making Another Female Comedy
Tuesday, December 17 by

But will it be raunchy with an underlying sweetness? Yes.

This is pretty exciting news.
‘Rounders 2′ Is Actually Quite Far Along, Will Start Filming Soon
Monday, December 16 by

Sadly, no Teddy KGB. Which means lost product placement money from Nabisco.

Screen Shot 2013-12-16 at 10.23.35 AM
‘Homeland’ Will Have Some Casting Shakeups Next Year (SPOILERS)
Monday, December 16 by

If you are planning on seeing the season three finale, but haven’t, you might not want to read this.

Let's cram sixty more characters into this shot.
Sony Turning Spider-Man World Into Avengers-Style Universe Of Characters. Ugh.
Friday, December 13 by

Good. Let’s complicate and convolute the story of a boy getting bitten by a radioactive spider, then becoming a spider himself.

A little something for the critics.
SNL Held An Audition For The Black Female(s) We All Said It Was Lacking
Friday, December 13 by

Now we should all complain about not having Ferraris.

Screen Shot 2013-12-12 at 9.26.26 AM
Will Arnett, Aaron Paul, And Amy Sedaris Will Star In A Netflix Animated Series
Thursday, December 12 by

Good news for people who like awesome things.

Are they going paintballing? May I join?
I Guess We Have To Talk About ‘Bad Boys 3′ Now
Wednesday, December 11 by

I know who the villain could be for this one! Terrorists!

I could see him in a sequined jumpsuit, singing about fat-bottomed girls.
Ben Whishaw, Who Looks A Little Like Freddie Mercury, Will Play Freddie Mercury In His Biopic
Wednesday, December 11 by

If it’s not an origin story called ‘Mercury Rising’, I’m chucking my laptop against the wall.

Seriously. Don't touch his hair.
‘World War Z’ Gets A New Director That Brad Pitt Likes More
Wednesday, December 11 by

Just don’t touch his hair, ok?

In the sequel, maybe he'll go shopping for a decent pair of jeans.
Tom Cruise Coming Back As ‘Jack Reacher’, The Cinematic Equivalent Of Lukewarm Tap Water
Tuesday, December 10 by

Was there clamoring for this? It must have been muffled.

Teaching a young Lance how to ride.
Dustin Hoffman Will Be In One Of Those Lance Armstrong Movies
Tuesday, December 10 by

The one with Ben Foster as Armstrong.

Adam Sandler, looking like he just joined the Marines. Which will probably be a movie soon.
It’s Now Official: Adam Sandler Is The Most Overpaid Actor
Tuesday, December 10 by

It’s now quantifiable how much he phones it in.