Ugh. I'll take my coffee to go, please.
Gunther, Diners, and Pork: The 5 Lamest Television Hangouts
Tuesday, October 11 by

Apparently, most sitcom characters don’t drink out of boredom the same way my friends and I do.

No, John. This is a bad thing.
‘Gotti’ Film Having Difficulty Finding Financing On Account Of It Being An Unholy Nightmare Of A Production
Monday, October 10 by

Gotti deserves better than this. Oh wait, no he doesn’t.

I think Netflix might actually be run by 'Saturday Night Live' cast members.
Netflix’s Qwikster And 4 Other Ridiculous Entertainment Marketing Blunders
Monday, October 10 by

These companies jerked us around so bad that we need some time to think things over. If you need us, we’ll be staying at our sister’s for a few days.

The torn envelope is symbolic.
Netflix Now Agrees With The Rest Of The World That Qwikster Was A Really Bad Idea
Monday, October 10 by

Good news: one site for all services. Bad news: rate hike stays and your streaming selections are still pretty awful. Sooooo…have a nice day?

Diversify, Netflix! You can deliver so many more things!
5 Things Netflix Should Rent Instead Of DVDs
Monday, October 10 by

Just think of all the things Netflix could send to you. No, not “cookies.” Think bigger.

Breaking Bad
4 ‘Breaking Bad’ Characters We Want To Die And 4 We Want To Live
Sunday, October 9 by

Maybe they’ll all die. That’d be kind of neat!

Steve Jobs at his Steve Jobsiest.
Sony Picks Up Steve Jobs Biography Because, Hey, Steve Jobs
Friday, October 7 by

NEWS FROM BEYOND THE GRAVE!

Yeah, I f*ckin' farted. Come at me, bro!
BREAKING: Fetish Group Trying To Purchase Footage Of Nancy Grace Farting
Friday, October 7 by

Nancy Grace’s ‘DWTS’ run is quickly turning her into Britney Spears, looks notwithstanding.

All responsible moms ride scooters.
A Funeral For A Fake Baby: ‘It’s Always Sunny’ Recap (S7E3)
Friday, October 7 by

At least it was a fake baby.

Our last line of defense.
Adult Swim Re-Ups On NTSF: SD:SUV
Thursday, October 6 by

At 15 minutes per episode, a new season means a whopping 90 minutes or so of programming the station won’t have to worry about next year.

The show's erotic moments often go overlooked.
It’s Sort-Of Official: The Next ‘Simpsons’ Season Will Be The Last
Thursday, October 6 by

Did someone say “Milhouse Spinoff?” Yes. I did. Just now. I want a Milhouse Spinoff.

All right, Drexl, let's make this quick. I don't want to be here any long than you do.
The 7 Sleaziest Drug Dealers In Film
Thursday, October 6 by

Don’t get us wrong – we’ll still buy from them, we just don’t know why they have to make it so unpleasant.

Robert Downey Jr., describing his first sexual experience.
Robert Downey Jr. To Put The System On Trial In ‘Perry Mason’ Franchise?
Wednesday, October 5 by

But will he be a big-city lawyer? The answer is “yes.”

In this story, a hooker will be playing the role of the pie.
Why Yes, Jason Biggs And His Wife DO Hire Hookers From Time To Time
Wednesday, October 5 by

He’s come a long way since f*cking pies.

It took every ounce of restraint not to make this whole piece 'Mighty Ducks'-based.
How To Create An Underdog Sports Comedy
Wednesday, October 5 by

We’re working on trademarking the phrase “lovable losers.”

I'm drunk right now.
7 Memorable Movie Whiskey Drinkers
Wednesday, October 5 by

Don’t offer them a Zima if you’re out of whiskey. Trust me.

Is that horse wearing a f*cking sombrero? Oh, man. This remake is going to be IN-SANE!
HOLY SH*T: TV’s ‘Mr. Ed’ Is Gonna Be A Movie
Tuesday, October 4 by

I hope this paves the way for other beloved, irrelevant properties to be made into films, too!

I'm willing to bet Steve Jobs modeled his office after this.
6 Movie Production Designs That Mirror Apple
Tuesday, October 4 by

Did Apple design these sets, or did these sets design Apple (metaphorically, of course)?

They just can't compete with streaming porn.
‘The Playboy Club’ Lasted Longer Than We Thought, Cancelled After Two Episodes
Tuesday, October 4 by

Apparently, sort of looking like ‘Mad Men’ will help your show last two episodes. After that, it has to be good.

A visionary genius.
9 Movie Scientists Who Deserve The Nobel Prize
Monday, October 3 by

I think we can all agree the Nobel ceremony would have been a lot more fun with a disappointed Marlon Brando in the audience.

You can get your ass kicked if you flash that sign in the wrong neighborhood.
J.J. Abrams Prepping A New Mystery Project. Must Be A Day That Ends In ‘Y’
Monday, October 3 by

It would actually be more mysterious if he did a project that wasn’t shrouded in secrecy.

Shockingly, this might be the most wholesome 'Sunny' episode ever.
Morticians And Beauty Contests: The ‘Always Sunny’ GIF Recap (S7E3)
Friday, September 30 by

Frank will allow his dead body to be filled with ‘cream’ after he dies.

" Hi! My name is Lex, and I bother more people in this film than the T-Rex does."
9 Obnoxious Child Characters That Make Me Want To Get My Tubes Tied
Friday, September 30 by

Quiet, little ones. The adults are talking.

I would charge the shit out of this kid.
7 Movie Baseball Players Less Clutch Than A-Rod
Thursday, September 29 by

This roster sports a monkey, a crippled kid, and Tommy Lee Jones. They’ll be out of the hunt by the All-Star break.

This show looks so f*cking fabulous I just threw my desk chair across the room.
Why Did It Take So Long For Nelson Mandela’s Granddaughters To Get Their Own Reality Show?
Thursday, September 29 by

“We’re not the African Kardashians.” – Then why would we watch?

She can kiss whoever she wants on our plane.
10 TV And Movie Lesbians We Wouldn’t Kick Off A Plane For Kissing
Thursday, September 29 by

Gay men can kiss too, but our readership is much more interested in the lesbian thing. It’s weird.

I knew going into this that I was going to use a picture of this guy in a disheveled suit and skinny tie, the only question was, "which picture?"
Zach Braff Takes To Reddit To Remind Everyone He Exists And Starred In ‘Scrubs’
Wednesday, September 28 by

Also, he’s a fan of indie rock and good friends with Donald Faison!

This man should be thrown in jail.
7 Movie Parents Who Should Lose Their Kids To Child Services
Wednesday, September 28 by

Good rule of thumb: If you shrunk your children or they are full-sized, but screwing pies, you’re probably not fit as a parent.

"Yes, but this gay guy is...flamboyant!"
7 Laziest Television Stereotypes
Wednesday, September 28 by

These stereotypes are lazy. Not the characters themselves, but the writing behind them.

Can you smell what Susan Sarandon is cookin'? It's a huckleberry cobbler. You boys must be hungry.
‘Snitch’ To FINALLY Pair Up The Rock And Susan Sarandon?
Tuesday, September 27 by

It makes sense, cause I’ve always considered The Rock to be the thinking man’s Tim Robbins.