When God shuts a Demi Moore, he opens a Chloe Sevigny.
The plaintiff here is so misguided that it compels me to side with Leno. This is shaping up to be a weird day.
That’s why you never improve property you don’t own. A cold lesson here, folks.
That glow that you get after sex? I guess you can get that from cosmetics, too.
Let’s go ahead and judge these films the best way we know how – on appearances.
Ironically enough, the Sam Rockwell film ‘Choke’ doesn’t make the list.
‘Variety’ did its job, but at what price. AT WHAT PRICE, VARIETY????
And probably not a first one, either.
Yup, there are only six.
This may not have been a Michael Richards-level incident, but it wasn’t good.
A mutation is defined as a genetic change or abnormality that makes a person really gross.
If anyone wants to come to my “‘Big Bang Theory’ is better than ‘Idol’” party this weekend, it will be held Sunday at a Golden Corral somewhere in Arkansas.
I always thought I would be the one to kill William Shatner.
Don’t get me wrong, finding out your dad was O.J. would still be completely and totally horrible…
If it’s anything like my experience with puzzles, the authorities will assemble the body only to discover they’re missing one tiny piece. Frustrating!
Donnie would have been in the corner, cowering like a little bitch.
This collection of recipes is how they turned Eddie Murphy into The Klumps.
It’s too early to tell if the victim deserved it, so let’s stop the speculation right now, guys.
This list will prove just how capable we writers are without our precious “Wikipedia.”
Welcome To The Club, Lana Del Rey…
I wonder if she’s Super-sized?
He should ban the real villain here, himself. Read on to figure out what the hell I’m talking about.
It’s a close-knit and folksy town full of violent felons.
It turns out that loading every meal with cream and salt might have negative health effects.
“Get ON your ass!” CW now owes me $10,000 because I just wrote this show’s tagline.
This article would be in poor taste if it wasn’t a Kardashian we were talking about.
If you eat his mustache trimmings, I’m assuming you become him?
Try to flex on him? Don’t be silly.
Now that this has been resolved, a nation can exhale and turn its focus to the presidential election.
Tom Cruise is missing out on a very obvious and lucrative opportunity here.