At 15 minutes per episode, a new season means a whopping 90 minutes or so of programming the station won’t have to worry about next year.

Did someone say “Milhouse Spinoff?” Yes. I did. Just now. I want a Milhouse Spinoff.

Don’t get us wrong – we’ll still buy from them, we just don’t know why they have to make it so unpleasant.

But will he be a big-city lawyer? The answer is “yes.”

He’s come a long way since f*cking pies.

We’re working on trademarking the phrase “lovable losers.”

Don’t offer them a Zima if you’re out of whiskey. Trust me.

I hope this paves the way for other beloved, irrelevant properties to be made into films, too!

Did Apple design these sets, or did these sets design Apple (metaphorically, of course)?

Apparently, sort of looking like ‘Mad Men’ will help your show last two episodes. After that, it has to be good.

I think we can all agree the Nobel ceremony would have been a lot more fun with a disappointed Marlon Brando in the audience.

It would actually be more mysterious if he did a project that wasn’t shrouded in secrecy.

Frank will allow his dead body to be filled with ‘cream’ after he dies.

Quiet, little ones. The adults are talking.

This roster sports a monkey, a crippled kid, and Tommy Lee Jones. They’ll be out of the hunt by the All-Star break.

“We’re not the African Kardashians.” – Then why would we watch?

Gay men can kiss too, but our readership is much more interested in the lesbian thing. It’s weird.

Also, he’s a fan of indie rock and good friends with Donald Faison!

Good rule of thumb: If you shrunk your children or they are full-sized, but screwing pies, you’re probably not fit as a parent.

These stereotypes are lazy. Not the characters themselves, but the writing behind them.

It makes sense, cause I’ve always considered The Rock to be the thinking man’s Tim Robbins.

My spank bank needs a bailout.

When we telephoned Brimley to get a quote for the piece, he offered up, “Don’t call this number again, dammit.”

It turns out that the studios didn’t want to offend China, lest they decide to boycott bootlegging the film.

It’s a good thing they’re around to point out what’s wrong with everything.

We would like to remind you that production was stopped on ‘The Lone Ranger’. Well, ignore that. It’s back on with a bare-bones $215 million budget.

Fact: Women covered in zombie blood are 48% hotter.

The producers figured audiences might enjoy a film about Brad Pitt more than they would a film about statistical analysis.

In which a group of obnoxious people travel to an obnoxious place.

I had the mayor and the commissioner all over my ass to create this list.