Marvel knows you better than you know yourself.

It’s nice to hear about one heiress who’s doing something legitimately un-heiress-like.

We have all the info here, and there’s no need to tattoo this blog post across your chest.

Charlie Sheen is going to help the crew… sort of.

A nice press conference photo before they spend every day of next year wearing heavy robes, caked in pounds of make-up, sweat and their own tears.

He’ll be vying for starring roles again, but can he arm wrestle away these parts from current action stars like Matt Damon?

In Hollywood, you can go to a bank, give them a new sci-fi drama pilot script with J. J. Abrams’ name attached, and the bank will give you money. It’s basically currency.

This show will take Wonder Woman completely seriously, with her lie detector lasso and invisible plane you can see the pilot inside.

“Would you like to see my collection of expensive, metal wall plate thingies?”

Seems like #3 in these Marvel trilogies is the easiest to screw up (see ‘Spider-Man 3′, ‘X-Men 3′, or better yet – don’t), but Black is a strong candidate.

It’s a movie I hope will make ‘The Bucket List’ look like the next ‘Spy Kids’ installment.

Summit hired ‘Twilight Saga’ writer Melissa Rosenberg to pen their upcoming reboot/remake/refart of ‘Highlander.’

There ain’t no party like a ‘Safe House’ party, and look who’s invited to the film: Robert Patrick, Brendan Gleeson, Liam Cunningham and Sam Shepard.

Luckily, there’s a deal in the works that will save these films from a fate worse than a Commie invasion: sitting on the shelf for even longer than they already have.

I will happily buy this for my mom for Christmas on DVD, as long as she doesn’t expect us all to watch it.

It’s lazier than this excerpt I’m writing right now.

The film is about a guilt trip from beyond the grave…

The crazy Mel Gibson puppet movie has a later release date.

Fergie defending Christina Aguilera is like Gallagher defending Carrot Top.

Director Paul Haggis (‘Million Dollar Baby’) was a Scientologist and he wants you to know those guys suck.

Fox is going to transform the ‘Mr. Men’ series of children’s books into an animated feature film, directed by Shawn Levy. No need to panic – I already hit the “Ruining My Childhood” button.

Will you marathon the first nine seasons before watching the final 10th season? For most of you, maybe even 99.9% of you, I’m guessing the answer is “no.”

Royal movie critic Queen Elizabeth II saw Academy Award nominated movie The King’s Speech and gave it four and a half corgis. That’s right, she sacrifices dogs whenever she sees a movie.

Deuce Bigalow is ready to get back into TV. I wonder how he got the confidence, with no one around to tell him that *he* can do it.

He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named might very well get named as part of the new James Bond cast.

With limey bastard Henry Cavill as Supes, the girls up for a big mystery part are Diane Kruger, Rosamund Pike and Alive Eve.

‘Argo’ is a movie that wants Ben Affleck to direct it. Ben Affleck says, “take a number, movie.”

Charlie Sheen’s reps believe one and a half men will become “Two and a Half Men” again by late February. Damn it, we were just beginning to enjoy the “Men”-lessness.

Five times the car chases. Five times car crashes. Five times the car motion blurs lines.

Green will play a witch who turns Johnny Depp into a vampire. If box office trends are any indication, Depp was going to have to become a vampire at some point anyway.