‘Final Destination 5′ Now ’5nal Destination’. Derp.
Wednesday, June 30 by

Someone in Studioland got a raise today. Their suggestion to change the title of Final Destination 5 to 5nal Destination almost certainly earned them a corner office with a view of the commissary. You may be asking yourself, "What does 5nal Destination mean anyway?" It doesn't matter, you. It'll look good on a poster, and high schoolers can change it to say Anal Destination.When you go to look for the film at the video store though, assuming video stores still exist when it gets released on DVD, don't search for it in the "F's" because you won't find it there. Look for it next to the cookie dough bites. It should be reasonably discounted almost immediately. (/Film) 

‘Love Ranch’ Actress Gina Gershon
Wednesday, June 30 by

Gina Gershon has always made my film reel shutter, from being the best thing in the epic disaster Showgirls to playing a mob battling lesbian ex-con Bound, she knows how to bring th sizzle back into movie screen sexy. With her current film Love Ranch she gets to be in back into her cathouse gear and amping up the cinema sweat with Joe Pesci and Helen Mirren.A word from Gina: "Actresses are nightmares. I don't hang out with any of them. That's a problem with my profession. I try not to be like an actress."Don't act. Just be. You could take some lessons from Elizabeth Berkley in Showgirls. All that floppin' and twitchin' during the pool sex scene came natural to her. More pics of anti-actress Gina after the jump.

‘Love Ranch’ Actress Bai Ling
Tuesday, June 29 by

Bai Ling is the kind of female actress you like if your into pixie thin asian girls and S&M. While she blends her career with politically active movies like Red Corner to creepy exotic leather clad characters in The Crow and Crank 2: High Voltage, she will always be my go to tweeker asian actress. Ling can be seen in the cathouse drama Love Ranch opposite Helen Mirren and Joe Pesci, where she plays a kleptomaniac prostitute. Dime a dozen!A word from Bai: “I worked with a wild leopard, who bit me. But I kept on working with him, because I have a wild side. I think I was an animal in a previous life.”If it helps you to work with a leopard by thinking you were once a leopard, then by all means remain delusional.  More pics of past animal Bai after the jump.

Disney to Unearth Guillermo del Toro’s ‘Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark’
Tuesday, June 29 by

When the plug was pulled on Miramax last year, a few films were sent to the dreaded Disney Vault with little hope of every seeing the light of day. But there is good news for horror fans today.  Don't Be Afraid of the Dark, the Guillermo del Toro-penned and Troy Nixey-directed R-rated remake of the 70's TV movie classic, will break free from its imprisonment. No longer will it be forced to pay protection money to such D-Vault tough-asses as Tinker Bell and the Fairy Prince and Tigger's Eighth Movie.The remake stars Guy Pearce and Katie Holmes as a couple who are placed at risk when Pearce's daughter accidentally unleashes malevolent creatures in the old mansion they've just moved into. Given the R-rating and del Toro's involvement, this could shape up to be pretty creepy. Though I'm sure Mike Tyson left things far scarier behind when he abandoned his mansion. (EW)

‘Last Comic Standing’ Judge Natasha Leggero
Monday, June 28 by

Natasha Leggero, a Chicago native and fast tracking stand-up comic, shows us that girls can be funny and hot at the same time. She has worked on some of the best comedy improv shows around, like "Reno 911" and "Upright Citizens Brigade." While she may not be up there with Sarah Silverman for funniest (fartiest) lady of the year, she knows how to hold here own in the ever-challenging world of stand-up.A word from Natasha: "I've performed everywhere from clubs, laundromats, and even halfway houses. Halfway houses are a lot of fun, people laugh there, even though they may not have a lot of teeth."Laughing helps with the withdrawal. At least that's what my prick sponsor tells me. HAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!More pics of Natasha after the jump.

‘Grown Ups’ Actress Maria Bello
Friday, June 25 by

Maria Bello is the blonde indie MILF from next door, as she has shown in past matriarchal roles in A History of Violence, Auto Focus, and The Cooler. With Grown Ups opening this week she may be playing second banana to Adam Sandler and his crew but she gets to have a couple of great boob popping moments as Kevin James's homegrown wife, Sally. She just can't seem to keep those things holstered. A word from Maria: "I like having sex on the stairs."But how will people get to the second level of your home? You should really think these things through first.More enticing pics of Maria after the jump.

‘Grown Ups’ Actress Salma Hayek
Thursday, June 24 by

Salma Heyek is always a hot babe you can see at the movies whether its art house period drama Frida where she sports a unibrow, or action packed thrill ride Desperado. She can flex her drama and comedic talent with her two other well known assets. She'll be seen next as Adam Sandler's wife in the vacation reunion comedy Grown Ups. Kate Beckinsale in Click and now Salma. Lucky bastard… A word from Salma: "I think it's not a femme fatale when someone is not doing it to manipulate men or be like a black widow. She loves him. She does it out of love. She wants him so badly to stay with her."Who in God's name is running away from you?! He should be dragged through the streets and beaten. And then I will slowly move in as his replacement.More of Salma's finer things after the jump.

‘Knight and Day’ Actress Gal Gadot
Wednesday, June 23 by

Gal Gadot is someone to look out for in the coming years, as she has proven to spice up big budget action fare like Fast & Furious and this week's Knight and Day. Coming from the land of the Middle East, this fomer Miss Israel shows us why her country is land worth fighting over.A word from Gal: "It's fun playing the bad girl, since I'm always the good girl in real life."Actresses say that all time. If they're all such goody two-shoes then who's helping Lindsay Lohan rail lines off of toilet paper dispensers? Show some solidarity, Girls.More innocent pics of Gal after the jump.

‘Knight and Day’ Actress Maggie Grace
Tuesday, June 22 by

Maggie Grace shows off her blonde sexy curls and fit body wherever she goes, either as a kidnapped teenager in Taken or a tough heroine in "Lost." She can next be seen in Knight and Day, but blink and you'll miss her performance as Cameron Diaz's matrimonial-bound sister. She'll be coming to Dwyane Johnson's rescue in this fall's Faster, where her smoking hot legs will be put to good action use.A word from Maggie: "High heels can be sexy. But before you leave the house, make sure you can walk in them. I've made that mistake."Must…resist…every temptation…to make a joke…about how blondes…can't walk…and doing anything else…at the same time… Check out more of a very balanced Maggie after the jump.

‘Persons Unknown’ Actress Lola Glaudini
Monday, June 21 by

Lola Glaudini is your friendly neighbor police/federal agent actress, either tracking down sociopaths in "Criminal Minds" or taking on the mob in "The Sopranos." With this summer's TV series "Persons Unknown," she gets another chance to show off her talents (and legs) as Kat, one of several mysterious people trapped in a ghost town.A word from Lola:"All the patterns are based off real patterns."Kind of like how these snozzberries taste like snozzberries… Very interesting. That's fine detective work, Glau Glau.Track down more pics of Lola after the jump.

‘Happy Town’ Actress Lauren German
Friday, June 18 by

Lauren German is a hot female movie heroine but with balls to boot, as she demonstrats in Hostel Part 2 when she cuts off a guy's balls. Catch her now on TV's "Happy Town" while ABC runs out the remaining episodes. A word from Lauren: "A drink offer is like a contract—it doesn’t mean you have to sleep with someone, but it does obligate you to talk to them."AND pretend be interested. Don't just like eye the bar for superior company or IM your friends about the loser you're talking to. We know, okay. And it hurts. Brush up on your German after the jump.

‘Justified’ Actress Natalie Zea
Thursday, June 17 by

Natalie Zea made several guest stints on "The Shield" (one of the best shows ever!) playing a love interest to Michael Chiklis's Det. Vic Mackey. This would be the first time a television drama has taken the "Really Hot Woman Loves Fat Guy" conceit seen in almost every sitcom. She then showed her bare breasts in "Hung" while getting banged in a restaurant bathroom by Tom Jane, and is now Timothy Olyphant's ex-wife on "Justified." She looks amazing in a pencil skirt.  A word from Natalie: "I have wonderful large cleavage with a contract and all the amenities… or I'm eating hummus." Whatever floats your boat. I'd be glade to share a tub of Sabra with you any day.More sophisticated pics of Natalie after the jump.

‘Jonah Hex’ Actress Julia Jones
Wednesday, June 16 by

 Julia Jones may not be in the twilight of her career yet but this natural beauty from Beantown will showcase her talents in two back-to-back movies this summer, Jonah Hex as a busty prostitute named Cassie and The Twilight Saga: Eclipse as she-wolf Leah Clearwater. Not bad for a former model turned actress, who was last seen in the Tarantino flophouse Hell Ride.A word from Julia: "If you try to scowl, just for four hours straight, you will start feeling pretty pissed off. I'm not kidding."Yeah because you're scowling for four hours straight. If I'm doing anything for four hours straight I'd get pissed off. Yes, even eating nachos.More pics of Julia smiling after the jump.

First ‘Real Steel’ Set Photos
Tuesday, June 15 by

Filming began yesterday on Hugh Jackman's robo-pugilism adventure Real Steel and we have the first set photos courtesy of USA Today. In the film, Jackman plays a washed up boxer who, along with his son, promotes and coaches a robotic fighter to win a boxing championship. We get a good glimpse at the robot, Noisy Boy, in the first pic and note that this is not a CG character. That's an honest-to-goodness robot pictured with Jackman. Sure, there is always the danger that it might go haywire and attack the crew, but it's still far safer than working with "Rampage" Jackson. Once his cold eyes are upon you, you're already dry-humped. You just don't know it yet.CHECK OUT THE PHOTOS AFTER THE JUMP…

‘Cyrus’ Actress Marisa Tomei
Monday, June 14 by

Marisa Tomei is an actress we all know and want, despite those never ending Academy Award rumors. During her more than 30 year span as an actress of the stage and screen, she has aged like a fine wine in hotness. Both Before The Devil Knows Your Dead and The Wrestler can a test to that (nakey scenes). With this week's Cyrus opening up, she puts her smokin' hot talents to good use by playing the ultimate MILF role to Jonah Hill and John C. Reily.A word from Marisa: "I'm not that big a fan of marriage as an institution, and I don't know why women need to have children to be seen as complete human beings."It's like she was sculpted and programmed by a man and then sent out into the world to enchant us. Whoever is responsible deserves The Noble Peace Prize. See more pics of perfect Tomei after the jump.

‘Winter’s Bone’ Actress Jennifer Lawrence
Friday, June 11 by

Jennifer Lawrence is a well-fed farmgirl and actress hailing from Louisville, KY. A former childhood actor from "The Bill Engvall Show," she makes her huge leap from the small screen to the big one this Friday with indie fest favorite Winter's Bone. While she is buttoned-up for the cold Ozark winter in her performance as Ree Dolly, we can see, once summer comes, a body that will give us a bone for all seasons.A word from Jennifer: "They want you to be likable all the time, and I'm just not."Harsh truth from a Twitter-gen actress. Bloggers feel your pain.More bonerific pics after the jump.

‘Splice’ Actress Sarah Polley
Thursday, June 10 by

One of Canada's most acclaimed actresses, Sarah Polley is also an accomplished director and a free-thinking progressive who's not afraid to make her political thoughts known. But she doesn't get all like up in your face about it, ya know? She's cool enough to have starred in Go and the Dawn of the Dead remake. If you deliver kill shots to zombies, you're alright in my book.A word from Sarah: "It takes terrible things to live well."Does it ever. **Lights a $100 bill with a $50 bill to light a Cuban. Stamps it out in a baby sealskin coaster**More pics of concerned Sarah after the jump.

‘Splice’ Actress Delphine Chanéac
Wednesday, June 9 by

Delphine Chanéac is a French model and actress whose last American film appearance was in The Pink Panther remake as "The Ticket Checker." She landed a meatier role as Dren in Splice, but unfortunately she has a shaved, cleft head like the lunch lady we all used to make fun of in elementary school. A word from Delphine: "I had to wear blue socks over high heels, my hands became my feet and my tail was wrapped in blue."Worst. First. Date. EVER. More pics of Delphine without a tail after the jump.

‘Final Destination 5′ To Be (Directed By Cameron’s) Number Two
Wednesday, June 9 by

"Derp! Why did I drive into this log?"Still no word on what totally retarded plot contrivances will make their way into Final Destination 5, but today we have news that a director has been hired. Avatar's 2nd HMFIC, Steven Quale, will be in charge of impaling sexy teens for the fifth go-round. Really though, who builds a javelin manufactory next to batting cages? That's an accident waiting to happen.Quale has a lot of experience with 3D, having co-directed the underwater documentary Aliens of the Abyss with James Cameron as well as serving as 2nd Unit Director on Avatar, so perhaps this movie won't be a complete wash-out. No details from Eric Heisserer's script have been released, so we don't know what narrowly-avoided cataclysmic event will serve as a catalyst for the plot. The fourth entry was based around a NASCAR race gone horribly awry, and seeing how these movies get progressively dumber, I'm going to say this one opens with an Insane Clown Posse concert fire. R.I.P. Juggalos. C U in Shangri-La. (THR)

‘Killers’ Actress Elena Kolpachikova
Tuesday, June 8 by

Elena Kolpachikova was born on the Black Sea in Yalta Ukraine, which sounds like a superhero origin story. She worked as a model in Europe for High Fashion designers, then moved to New York and graduated from the Lee Strasberg Institute and NYU film school, started her acting career and moved to Los Angeles. Beauty AND brains, fellas. Raise your hand if you're intimidated. More pics of the Elena a.k.a. The Complete Package after the jump.

‘Killers’ Actress Katheryn Winnick
Monday, June 7 by

Born and raised in Etobicoke, Canada, Katheryn Winnick trained extensively in the martial arts growing up. She currently holds a third-degree Black Belt in tae kwan do, a second-degree Black Belt in karate, and is a licensed bodyguard. Talk about a killer! Am I right or am I right or am I right?! A word from Katheryn: "I love roles that are strong and manipulative, thats why I became an actress."Funny, that's the reason I love being a man. More pics of Katheryn manipulating you with her body after the jump.

‘Get Him To The Greek’ Actress Natalina Maggio
Friday, June 4 by

Natalina Maggio has starred in a bunch of TV shows as characters credited as "Model," "Cheerleader," "Bikini Girl," and "Persian Porn Star." In Get Him to the Greek she plays "Hot Club Dancer." If Natalina keeps climbing the ladder this quickly it won't be long before she lands the role of "Attractive Restaurant Hostess."A word from Natalina: Models and Bikini Girls don't speak in public. More reasons why Natalina plays hot girls after the jump.

‘Get Him To The Greek’ Actress Rose Byrne
Thursday, June 3 by

Rose Byrne is an Australian actress. She plays Ellen Parsons in the FX show "Damages," opposite American dramatic institution Glenn Close. Byrne has been in a relationship with Australian writer, director and actor Brendan Cowell for over four years (Boooo!). The couple maintained a long-distance relationship for much of their relationship, with work commitments meaning they were often on separate continents. This means he's a better man than you. A word from Rose: "I see myself more as a character actress than a celebrity."Keep that good head on your shoulders. When you discover you're a celebrity you'll probably want coke, or to kill a homeless person. Apparently it has something to do with power. More pics of professional Rose after the jump.

‘Get Him To The Greek’ Actress Zoe Salmon
Wednesday, June 2 by

Zoe Salmon was the host of the children's television show "Blue Peter." Shortly after her debut, she famously said, "I'd try anything once," which started a trend in her being asked to do dangerous or embarrassing things including wing-walking on top of an antique biplane. An antique biplane? What kind of dares are these?!A word from Zoe: "I'd try anything once."Oh yeah? Would you wing-walk on top of an antique biplane? Damnit, why does the mind go straight to that?More pics of Zoe trying getting her picture taken after the jump.

‘Finding Bliss’ Actress Stormy Daniels
Tuesday, June 1 by

Stormy Daniels, also known simply as Stormy, is a porn star, screenwriter, and director. She also appeared in the The 40-Year-Old Virgin as the object of Andy's fantasy after he viewed one of her films. She tried to run for a Senate seat in her hometown of Louisiana, but then soon realized there are pics everywhere of her getting banged.A word from Stormy: "I am ready today to declare that should I seek the office of U.S. Senator from the great state of Louisiana that I will do so as a Republican."The sexual prowess of the GOP just went up 100 fold.More pics of Stormy doing what she's best at after the jump.

‘Finding Bliss’ Actress Christa Campbell
Monday, May 31 by

Usually when an actress starts her career doing softcore Skinimax movies, she ends her it doing hardcore porn, but Christa Campbell has managed to get more mainstream with every credit. She went from Erotic Landscapes to Lonely Hearts, and can be seen in Finding Bliss, which opens June 4 in NYC and June 11 in L.A. Reruns of her Skinimax movies can be seen on Skinimax.A word from Christa: "Life live, enjoy."And a l'chaim to you too, kind lady. Much more of Christa's skin after the jump.

‘Friday Night Lights’ Actress Jurnee Smollett
Friday, May 28 by

Jurnee Smollett began her career as a child model and landed recurring roles on both "Hangin' With Mr. Cooper" and "Full House" before co-starring with her siblings in the sitcom "On Our Own." The Smolletts wanted to be the next Jacksons, but it didn't happen. Lately, Jurnee starred in the Denzel Washington directed The Great Debaters and is currently Landry's budding love interest on "Friday Night Lights." A word from Jurnee: "There is crying and pain going on. There's a whole population screaming out and no one is listening."Wow, way to be a buzz kill. Can't we just talk about Justin Bieber's stupid haircut or something?Take more of a Jurnee after the jump. Rimshot!

‘Survival of the Dead’ Actress Michelle Morgan
Thursday, May 27 by

Michelle Morgan is our second Canadian import of the week. She is featured in the drama series "Heartland" as Amy Fleming's older sister Lou and in the 2008 zombie horror flick Diary of the Dead. George Romero loves his Canadian women (because they're cheaper). A word from Michelle: "She's just a chick, ya know?"Prove it.More pics of Michelle after the jump, minus the maple syrup.

‘Survival of the Dead’ Actress Amy Lalonde
Wednesday, May 26 by

Amy Lalonde is a fine import from Canada. She has made guest appearances on "Queer as Folk" and "Battlestar Gallactica." Before Amy turned to acting, she was a high school teacher in Ontario. Some teenagers have all the luck, I tell ya.A word from Amy: "Eh, what's this aboot?"She's Canadian. She's had to have said that at some point in her life.More pics of Amy after the jump.

‘Survival of the Dead’ Actress Kathleen Munroe
Tuesday, May 25 by

Kathleen Munroe is best known for the role of Annabelle Banks in the television series "Beautiful People." She's also appeared in "Without a Trace," "Cold Case," and "CSI:NY," so she's basically an expert on procedurial dramas.  A word from Kathleen: Apparently she hasn't ever said anything. At least nothing that I could find in my "extensive" search. More pics of mute Kathleen after the jump.