The new trailer for Gamer, Neveldine & Taylor's answer to Running Man, Death Race and The Matrix is out now. The film stars Gerard Butler as a death row inmate named Kabel, who's become an unwitting pawn in a multi-player simulation game called "Slayers," created by evil genius Michael C. Hall (TV's Dexter). We know where this is going, but Neveldine/Taylor always seem to find a way to increase the A.D.D. appeal in ways never thought possible. The film also stars Amber Valetta, Ludacris, John Leguizmo and Terry Crews (The Expendables & Terminator Salvation). Check it out after the jump if you're still even reading this.
In an effort to further remove all suspense from Terminator Salvation, Warner Brothers has released 59 new photos from the upcoming release. I swear we'll have seen every frame of this film before it hits theaters. Anyway, I've decided to post the most surprising of all.Apparently we were fools to ever have trusted Vicki the Robot.See the rest of the pics at /Film.And here are some more morning headlines.As his star rises, Joel McHale's aspirations do not. (Cinema Blend) Common to be horribly miscast as B.A. Baracus? (Movie Hole)Willie probes ALF a la David Lynch. (Warming Glow)What the world needs more than anything right now is another dull and uninspired H2 poster. (Filmofilia)A LOST movie could happen. But probably won't. But it could. (Latino Review)
According to Nikki Finke's Deadline Hollywood Daily, Paramount's Star Trek pulled in $26 million on saturday, a 9% increase from Friday's box office. The studio is reportedly confident that the totals for the film, including the Thursday night previews, will reach $75 million. Not quite as big as X-Men Origins: Wolverine, but one would have to think Star Trek's gonna outlast its mutant rival if the reviews mean anything. In any case, it's another success for JJ Abrams to celebrate. In tribute to Mr. Abrams, here's a video from the Fine Brothers that posits what would happen if Trek met Lost. See the rest of the weekend Box Office Estimates after the jump:
Recently, IESB.Net posted 10 – count 'em – 10 new clips from McG's Terminator Salvation. Not a ton of spoilers, but a little extra context into a lot of stuff we've seen in the trailers already. 'Nuff said. Watch with me if you want to live. #1 – "What are you doing here?"
Dear Star Wars fans,There's something I've needed to get off of my chest for years now… something that even when pointed out and shown in plain sight may shock people. The true hero of the Rebel cause and destroyer of the Galactic Empire is not Luke Skywalker.I'm talking about Lando Calrissian.Luke, Leia and Han, while important characters, showed nowhere near the bravery or cunning of Lando. He's just a misunderstood character, appearing as this Galaxy's Judas to some. But rest assured nothing could be further from the truth. Allow me to elucidate…
Terminator Salvation – 4 Minutes – Watch more Movie Trailers This Guy Is The Best Shower Singer (FilmDrunk) Italians Rule The Blogosphere (MoonDogSports) Happy Mothers Day, Danzig Style (SickPigs) 25 Sexy Female Mugshots (Manofest) I Wanna Be Captain Kirk (Pajiba) Sandy Scott Is Spankin' Hot (GorillaMask) Pregnant Teens Dance (IAmBored) The 6 Greatest Battlefield Mindfucks (Cracked) Vin Diesel Is The Wheelman (Filmofilia) Hippo vs Giant Octopus (HolyTaco) Arizona States Indie Run (BustedCoverage) Monica Keena Is Way HOT (Uncoached) Jason Statham vs. Daniel Craig (Unreality) Heath Ledger In Parnassus (ThePlaylist) Missing Dog! (TomOatmeal) Pantless Dude Gets Owned (NothingToxic)
Joey, do you like sequels about gladiators?For those of us who’ve seen Ridley Scott’s Gladiator, it’s probably a safe bet to say the story of Russell Crowe’s Maximus has already reached a satisfying end. (If you haven’t seen it and you don’t mind SPOILERS… Maximus dies at the end after accomplishing all he set out to do, leaving no room for sequels per se).Yep, there is absolutely no way an audience could ever expect anything more from Crowe and Scott’s collaboration. A sequel – aside from being completely unnecessary – seems nearly impossible. Where’s the entry point? There is no way the talent involved would even think about approaching a sequel to such a celebrated, complete story. Right?What? We’re talking about Hollywood? In 2009? Oh. Ahem. Right.Turns out that Nick Cave, writer of Australian western The Proposition and the upcoming adaptation of The Road, has written out a Gladiator 2 script that the folks over at Gone Elsewhere got a hold of. If you’re into lengthy reviews, then you can check it out on their site. If you’re into the Cliff Notes, then look no further than the jump.
This Guy Is The Best Shower Singer (FilmDrunk)Italians Rule The Blogosphere (MoonDogSports)Happy Mothers Day, Danzig Style (SickPigs)25 Sexy Female Mugshots (Manofest)I Wanna Be Captain Kirk (Pajiba)Sandy Scott Is Spankin Hot (GorillaMask)Pregnant Teens Dance (IAmBored)
The newest trailer for the Will Ferrell comedy Land of the Lost debuted today, adn we have it after the jump. The opening classroom scene is a nice little twisted spin on the classic Kindergarten Cop kids-say-the-darnedest-things conceit, setting up Ferrell's character as a failing scientist a bit more than we've seen in the Superbowl spot. After that, it's pretty much two minutes of Ferrell running around and scream-talking at special effects, all underscored by The Who's "Won't Get Fooled Again." The he gets to make out with Anna Friel. Typical.
Crank writing/directing duo Neveldine & Taylor’s next movie (shot prior to Crank: High Voltage) is a futuristic thriller called Gamer, and features everyone's favorite Spartan Gerard Butler as a "star player" in a game called "Slayers," in which humans – like Butler – control other humans in online gaming environments. Such a meta-actioner. A metactioner. I just coined it. Send me money!!!Royalties aside, I think the new interactive poster for the film is worth showing you guys. You can move your mouse over Butler's face and, instead of drawing a mustache like normal, you get to peel away layers to show the mastermind controlling him in the film. Actually, he doesn't look super authoritarian, so maybe he's more of a middle managemind.Get to playing with Butler's face after the jump
Directors: Mark Neveldine/Brian TaylorCast: Gerard Butler, Milo Ventimiglia, Alison Lohman, Michael C. Hall, Efren Ramirez, Terry CrewsSynopsis: Set in a future-world where humans can control other humans in mass-scale, multi-player online gaming environments, a star player (Butler) from a game called "Slayers" looks to regain his independence while taking down the game's mastermind (Hall).(Formerly known as Citizen Game).
Here's the last Star Trek starlet to get you prepped for Abrams's sexed up reboot, if you haven't seen it three times already. Our featured girl's roles have gotten smaller and smaller each day, and we're ending on a girl who's character is basically the equivalent of an Original Series red shirt, minus the expendable part. Yes, it's siren Rachel Nichols as "Gaila," the green Star Fleet Cadet! Where You've Seen Her Before: Rachel's familiar with Abrams and company, having guest starred on the fifth (and final) season of "Alias" as CIA Agent Rachel Gibson. She also showed up in the remake of The Amityville Horror, in Charlie Wilson's War as one of "Charlie's Angels," and in The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2, which you have secretly seen and enjoyed on a lonely saturday night. You're going to be seeing a lot more of Rachel this summer, as she's also starring as Scarlett in G.I. JOE: The Rise of Cobra.Random Quote: "I am smarter than you, and I am better looking, and I have an accomplished career, and I’m not even thirty."Well then. See how accomplished Rachel is in these racy photos after the jump.
Detective Salinger’s gun is stolen by gang bangers and the detectives launch an off-record investigation to relocate the weapon. Their search takes them a bit deeper than they had anticipated. Worst NightmareSalinger removes himself from the driver’s seat of a vehicle he’s managed to wrap around a pole. All that remains of the hood is warped metal and smoke. He crumbles to his knees and spits blood. We learn that a cop’s most commonly recurring worst nightmare is one where they lose their gun. For Sal, the nightmare has become a reality. Everybody’s Doing ItTammy sneaks a joint in the bathroom she and Detective Bryant share. Sam is lying in bed, calling to his wife who won’t respond. The dog is going ape-shit, clawing at the door. Sam bursts in to find his wife getting high. He tells her to flush it which she does, but not before reminding him that he used to love doing it, too. Cat Lady
Parks and Recreation: The BanquetLeslie begins the episode by regaling the camera crew with the tale of William Bixby Mark, who traded a baby to a tribe of Native Americans for what is now Indianapolis. She then goes on to say that these same Native Americans cut off Mark’s face and crafted a dream-catcher out of it, before making rain-sticks out of his legs. After she praises the resourcefulness of these Natives, who use “every part of the pioneer”) the credits roll, and we’re off!
Of course the big news this weekend is that the J.J. Abrams-helmed Star Trek is playing in wide-release. Reviews have been glowing so far and the movie is sure to rake in the Earth bucks and be a smash hit. Finally! Thanks so much for making Trek sexy and cool. Now I can wear my Spock ears in public without the fear of getting a front-wedgie. Here are more morning headlines…WEREWOLF: THE SERIES finally coming to DVD!!! (Dread Central) Bruce Willis is Obsessed with Beyonce and lawn care. (NY Mag)District 9 teaser poster is not welcoming. (Yahoo)Mike Tyson sings! Please auto-tune. Kthxbai. (The Playlist) Sin City 2: City Of Sin in the works. (Latino Review)More MAD TV. God. Please, why?! (TV Squad) Happy Mother's Day! (THR)
One Eyed Monster Trailer – Watch more Movie TrailersThis is the trailer for the film, One Eyed Monster starring Ron Jeremy, available on DVD right now. It's a horror movie about Jeremy's detached penis going on a rampage, and an adult film crew banding together to stop it, natch. Somewhere, a Gender Studies professor is already beginning her dissertation on the film as a biting media satire, but I'm pretty sure it's just about a giant dick killing people. At about 1:59 in the clip, an actor pretty much sums up the movie, and his line delivery is so earnest, he should win an award or something. Check out the links from some other huge dicks that we fear & respect. Favre's Agent Wants To Win Another Superbowl (MoonDogSports) 10 Hilarious Movies That Got Awful Reviews (UnrealityMag) Mike Tyson Sings Phil Collins (FilmDrunk) Images of Robert Downey Jr. in his Iron Man 2 Suit (Pajiba) '12 Months' In Estonian (Manofest) The Keyboard Cat Should Have co-starred in Garfield 2 (SickPigs) Carla Morgan Is Spankin' Hot (GorillaMask) This Guy's The Life Of THe Party (IAmBored) Star Trek's Most Ridiculous Alien Races (Cracked) Awesome District 9 Trailer (Filmofilia) Manny Ramirez's Steroid Storyboards (Holytaco) Eyes Wide Shut Orgy, Arizona State-style (BustedCoverage) Hotties In The Wild Internet (Uncoached)
Star Trek officially opens tonight and Mother's Day is Sunday. How appropriate, then, that we introduce you to Jennifer Morrison, who plays Winona Kirk, the mother of Capt. James Tiberius Kirk, in JJ Abrams' film. There are several different backstories associated with the character, but no matter what reality you buy into as a Trekker, you can't deny Jennifer's practically playing the mother of god. Where you've seen her before: She's probably most familiar as Dr. Allison from Fox's "House" series, but she's also played Jamie in Grind, Amy in Urban Legends: Final Cut, and Chris in a small 2004 film called Mall Cop, whose makers probably hate their lives right now.Random Quote: "My resume for Cameron has me graduating medical school the year I graduated junior high.”See pictures of Jennifer after the jump:
In the Scrubs series finale tears are shed, laughs are shared, confessions are made, disputes are resolved, and hugs that should have been distributed years ago are finally given. Morning SexJ.D.’s finale begins in the same place his career with Sacred Heart began eight years ago. He wakes this morning next to Elliot and thinks back to his first day and all the things that happened then. He remembers hiding with Elliot in the supplies closet, Kelso’s first unkind words to him, and the time Janitor accused him of sticking a penny in the door, sealing it shut. J.D. tries to use the fact that it’s his last d ay to score some morning sex, but Elliot isn’t having it. She tells him that she moved her bed into his apartment, and J.D. realizes that she’s been “sneak-moving” into his new place. Eventually, J.D. gets his morning sex. Bitter Roast
“Star Trek” has been lying on the emergency room table for a good 10 years now, finally flat-lining with the ultra-flop “Nemesis” back in 2003, and then being confirmed dead when the pitiable TV series “Enterprise” was cancelled in 2005. After having overcome cancellation, diminishing box office returns, and an increasingly maligned mythology only taken seriously by hardcore fanboys, “Star Trek” looked like it had finally breathed its last Enter JJ Abrams, who has retooled, rebooted, and re-energized this franchise into a slick, hip, action-packed and character-driven summer blockbuster that will bring in much-needed new fans and please plenty of hard-to-satisfy Trekkies. The hardcore fans won’t be happy, but then again, are they ever?
You want to see the new Star Trek, don't you? Don't you?!?! Ok then. Just Google 'star trek showtimes,' and pick from the lot. In the 25 mile radius of theatres around my house, Star Trek is being shown 89 times tonight between it's premiere at 7pm and the midnight screenings. Oh look–There's even a theater playing it every minute! Heck, why not avoid the costumed drunken Klingons and just see it at 3am tomorrow morning on IMAX? And what about you, Enterprise, AL? Or even you, 'Captain' Kirkland, WA? Bottom line, it's playing everywhere, all the the time. And it's going to kick ass. So get your damn tickets already (they're going fast).KHAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNN!!!!!!!In preparation for tonight's festivities, read our review of the film, or check out some Trek video delights after the jump:
io9 has uncovered a few clips from the awfulsome direct-to-DVD movie, Lockjaw. I've embedded one of the scenes below. It features DMX fighting a voodoo-created snake-alligator using only his wits and a bazooka. That synopsis is pretty much the tattoo that I was planning on getting. Just watch it already.Lockjaw – Watch more Funny VideosBill Maher uncovers the Susan Boyle sex-tape. (TV Squad) Kiefer Sutherland probably still drinking. (National Ledger) Rambo shirt will get you killed everywhere except Mexico. (Cinematical) Ninja trailer looks pretty all right. (Cinema Blend) Whatever Works poster highlights LD's junk. (First Showing)
Mothers Day Card 03 – Watch more Funny Videos
Mothers Day Card 02 – Watch more Funny Videos
Mothers Day Card 04 – Watch more Funny Videos
Mothers Day Card 01 – Watch more Funny Videos
Mothers Day Card 05 – Watch more Funny Videos
Give em Hell Malone Cannes Trailer – Watch more Funny VideosCheck out the Cannes trailer for Thomas Jane and Ving Rhames in Give 'em Hell, Malone, a Dashiell Hammet-inspired detective flick directed by Russell Mulcahey, who also helmed The Scorpion King 2, Resident Evil: Extinction and AC/DC: Family Jewels. The shameless title of this post is in reference to a character's line at about 1:54 in the clip, a line that has already solidified its place on a tee-shirt and bumper sticker somewhere, I'm sure. Frightening Star Trek Fans (Manofest) Lucy Pinder poses nude with Wolverine claws. (FilmDrunk) Supreme Court Nominee Effects Sports Law (MoonDogSports) Jenna Lee Fox Business Network Interview (WallStreetFighter) Frank The Tank Joins 'Neighborhood Watch' (Pajiba) Misty Dawns Spank Bank (GorillaMask) Awesome Star Wars Wedding (IAmBored) 10 Popular Porn Scenarios (Cracked) Transformers 2 News (filmofilia) Clash Of The Titans Set Pics (DreadCentral) Office Etiquette Instruction (HolyTaco) Kentucky Derby Bikini (BustedCoverage) Snow Monkeys Are Too Human Like (Uncoached) Ryan Reynolds Is DeadPool (Unreality) What To Do If You Notice You're On Fire (TomOatmeal) Doctor Parnassus Screens In L.A. (ThePlaylist) Dude Fails At Carnival Hammer (NothingToxic)
Well, another day, another Inglourious Basterds poster featuring another cast member being labeled a "Basterd." This time it's Diane Kruger… but we didn't want to use that as our main image, because we're feeling whimsical today. So here's a fake poster from our fantasy version of inglourious Basterds, in which a youthful Gary Coleman takes on the Nazis. Whatchutalkin'bout, Hitler?!See the real Diane Kruger poster (and the others released at this point) after the jump.
If you haven't seen Zach Galifianakis's FunnyOrDie show, Between Two Ferns, you've been missing the internet's best talk show, period. In the new episode, the hirsute star of the upcoming Vegas comedy The Hangover (also starring likely Green Lantern Bradley Cooper and The Office's Ed Helms) waxes idiotically while interviewing Natalie Portman, who does her best not to crack up. She's a trooper. Watch the video after the jump, and see Mr. Galifianakis threaten to tie a Yorkshire Terrier's penis in a knot.
There have been rumors floating around, but today, on CNN's "American Morning," anchored by Kiran Chetry, former porn star (and current adult film producer) Stormy Daniels was interviewed about her 'serious' potential candidacy for United States Senate. If it happens, she would be running in Louisiana against Republican Senator David Vitter, whom you may remember as being involved with the "D.C. Madame" and her prostitution ring back in '07. Embedded video from CNN Video Not sure what platform Daniels will run on, but if one does only a tiny bit of research (or opens the secret compartment in the air duct where one keeps one's pornography), it's easy to see that Daniels has had experience with several hot button issues of the day. She's seen action in the Persian Gulf with… She's brushed up on Foreign Relations with… And she's closely examined our broken health care system in… Seems like we're merely steps away from…