Don't worry, economy. Once Johnny Depp and Jerry Bruckheimer get done making Pirates of the Caribbean 4 and The Lone Ranger for Disney, they should have more than enough money to bail us out of this pesky recession. Johnny's not even playing the Lone Ranger, he's only going to be Tonto, but something tells me Disney isn't going to be paying him in giant turkey legs.

I'm excited about Zack and Miri Make A Porno. So exited that I made a series of posters that ask the question: what it other movie pairs (and Gandhi) got into the smut game? If I left any off, feel free to email me at feedback@screenjunkies.com.

I'm excited about Zack and Miri Make A Porno. So exited that I made a series of posters that ask the question: what it other movie pairs (and Gandhi) got into the smut game? If I left any off, feel free to email me at feedback@screenjunkies.com.

It's usually a bad idea whenever anyone starts off as one thing and then later becoms an actor.

Our pal Jason from Friday the 13th clearly needs some help with the ladies. All you have to do is comment on this post with a pick-up line appropriate for our lumpy-headed friend and you could get away with the complete first season of Chuck on DVD.

Attractive women can get away with a lot. Supermodels can get away with more.  I call this the Tyra Banks Effect. She can be serious, or be a total goofball. Whatever the mood, she is always very, very hot. Enjoy.

I pride myself in the fact that I have lived in New York for a long time and have never gone to see a musical of any kind. But, that might have to change when the musical adaptation of the Bret Easton Ellis book hits the stage.

This week's episode starts with a terrorist attack on a bus, as if public transportation didn't suck enough already.

Mr. ass kicking ponytail guy (Steven Segal) is back for more ass kicking ponytail having ACTION.

The Godfather: The Coppola Restorations

The Worst Week of My Life was a hit sitcom in Britain, but CBS is hoping that it will play here in the US, too. The main character, Sam, has to tell his future in-laws that he has impregnated their daughter. If that wasn't going to be hard enough, he keeps getting himself into incredibly wacky situations that are outrageous, even by sitcom standards.

Recap: Season 1, episode 1. If you're really into third party embarrassment, then Worst Week might be the best thing to happen to TV for you since The Office came stateside. Plot:

I read Herman Melville's classic story of aquatic revenge back when I was in high school. And by "read" I mean I had a comic book version like the one from Major League that I used to get the basic idea and then just faked my way through class.

Looks like Kanye has stopped smashing cameras at LAX long enough to develop a show for Comedy Central. They concept? Hip hop meets the Muppets. Sweet.

Goodfellas is one of the best movies ever made, but it offers education as well as entertainment. Below are nine of the most important messages you should hold on to after watching Martin Scorcese's classic for the 500th time. So read on and pay attention, you rat, you. Everybody takes a beating sometimes.

Recap: Season 3, episodes 1 and 2 "The Second Coming" and "Butterfly Effect"  No one would blame you if you gave up on Heroes last season, not even the writers. But after watching last night's episodes, I'm ready to believe that they're back to what made the show great in the first place.

With the return of Heroes on Monday, I have heard a bunch of people talking about which power from the show they would want for themselves. But there are a few abilities that never get any love, mainly because they would be useless in the real world. These are the seven powers I wouldn't bother putting on tights for. 7. Mass Poisoning

Town puts down grunge and lattes only to get tear gassed by cops.

Sitting in front of the TV, watching the riots unfold in Seattle during the WTO from the 4th floor lounge of my college dorm was really when I first got the sense that there might be something amiss in the world of global capitalism.  Starbucks being looted, storefronts being smashed—it turned out that there were some people that were kind of angry about the status quo.

Days are getting shorter and temperatures are getting colder, which means staying in and watching TV is even more appealing. Plus, everyone is broke, but luckily, you have the series premiere of Worst Week and three hours of Heroes to keep you busy tonight. Read on for our previews of both. Worst Week

It’s Louisiana, so everybody has to have a problem. If you’re black you’re also gay. If you work in a Walmart you have a rapier wit and are too smart for your surroundings. If you’re captain of the football team, you’re also a sex addict with a penchant for rough rolls in the swamp. If you’re a trailer park blonde, you’re also telepathic.

So far each episode has ended with Sookie looking like she’s reached the end of the line. At the end of episode 2, she was surrounded by raver looking vampires on the porch of Bill’s civil war mansion. Episode 3, "Mine" finds Sookie where we left her, now using her mental powers to resist to the hypnotism that the vampires are throwing in her direction.

No one expects you to actually watch the Emmy Awards Show. I have an unnatural relationship with TV and I can barely make it through them without falling asleep. But, that doesn't mean we can't criticize their choices from the comfort of our office chairs the morning after they happen.

Recap: Season 5 episode 3. You know, for a guy who is supposed to be making a come back, it sure looks like Vinny Chase is still falling further onto his hunky ass. Pretty soon, Eris is going to be the only guy in the crew with a job. Well, unless Turtle goes to work at Foot Locker or something. Vince:

And now a look at the business side of things, which was just moved to a way cheaper building with lower-wage employees somewhere on the outskirts of Bangalore.

We have been hearing about Seth Rogen's Green Hornet movie for a while and today it got its director. The movie drops on June 25, 2010 and will have Stephen Chow at the helm and in Bruce Lee's old role as Kato. If you're not super familiar with Chow, he's the guy who has directs weird, but cool movies like Kung Fu Hustle and Shaolin Soccer.

Well, it’s a big weekend for the pictures. I guess the point of the fall season is that it’s time to stop being outside and time to start watching stuff.  If you were to try to watch this entire list you would probably need to buy a diaper and install a fridge on the couch.

The Office and 30 Rock haven't premiered yet, but I'm still pretty confident that It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia is the funniest show on TV. Didn't catch the season premiere? Well, Charlie and Dee become cannibals, while Mac and Dennis go hunting for a homeless man. Awesome. Charlie and Dee:

The season premiere of The Ultimate Fighter: Team Nogueira vs. Team Mirbegan not with a bang, but with a whimper: As the 32 UFC hopefuls lined up to get pep-talked by Dana White, Phillipe Nover got a case of the vapors and passed out. (Is this show hardcore or what?!) To add further embarrassment to his situation, nobody seems to know how to pronounce Nover’s first name.

A lot of people are jealous of Diablo Cody. She’s been vaulted to stardom really fast.  She looks like a Suicide Girl and writes really cutesy dialogue. It makes some dudes angry. Other dudes get a boner. And some, like me, just get an angry boner. Here’s her fanboy-directed rant, and some pics.