Quentin Tarantino Cruelly Waves ‘Vega Brothers’ Carrot Before Michael Madsen’s Nose
Friday, April 9 by

Michael Madsen is saying things again. According to the actor, Quentin Tarantino figured out a way to move forward with the Vega Brothers film that he's been hoping to do for years now. Originally envisioned as a prequel pairing Pulp Fiction bad-ass Vincent Vega and Reservoir Dogs bad-ass Vic Vega, the film would star both John Travolta and Madsen. Then Tarantino decided that the actors were too old (a polite way of saying swollen) to play younger versions of their memorable characters. Now Madsen says that QT has a way to set the film in modern day and work around the fact that both Vincent and Vic Vega are deceased. But how? “No, actually Quentin went down to Tijuana recently, and on his return he said that he came up with an idea that the movie didn’t have to be a prequel, that John and I could play each other's twin brothers."  “I’d be Vic Vega’s twin brother,” Madsen explained. “[Travolta would] be Vincent’s twin brother and we’re both on a flight from Los Angeles, having just been released from prison, and neither one of us know that we’re the twin brother of the other one and we’re both on our way back to LA to avenge the death of our brothers.” Now I've heard stories about Tijuana but… wow. Either Tarantino went down there for some serious mind expansion, or he fell asleep while watching  Big Business on cable. Just like the time he fell asleep watching Overboard. That's how we got Kill Bill, you know. (WAAF Boston via Cinematical) Watch Madsen's interview after the jump…

‘The Other Guys’ Trailer
Friday, April 9 by

The trailer for The Other Guys has dropped and it provides a great deal more context than the fancy schmancy motion poster did. Although a part of me is missing the "Ridin' Dirty" background music. Watch out, synopsis comin' atchya! Set in New York City, The Other Guys follows Detective Allen Gamble (Ferrell), a forensic accountant who’s more interested in paperwork than hitting the streets, and Detective Terry Hoitz (Wahlberg), who has been stuck with Allen as his partner ever since an embarrassing public incident with his quick trigger finger. Allen and Terry idolize the city’s top cops, Danson and Manzetti (Dwayne Johnson and Samuel L. Jackson), but when an opportunity arises for the Other Guys to step up, things don’t quite go as planned.

Ashley Greene to Play in ‘Butter’
Friday, April 9 by

Ashley Greene enjoys butter so much she's signed on to co-star in a movie about it. The film centers on an Iowa woman (played by Jennifer Garner) who attempts to win a butter-carving title formerly held by her husband (Ty Burrell), only to be thwarted by a young black girl (Yara Ahahidi). Wait, where's the part about Greene slathered in hydrogenated oil? This has been one big tease!  Greene will play a rebellious high schooler named Kaitlen Pickler in the film directed by Jim Field Smith, who also directed hottie Alice Eve in She's Out of My League. Just a suggestion, but a movie starring Ashley Greene, Alice Eve, butter, and absolutely no premise sounds like box office gold. Mainly because I would personally see it 250,000,000 times. (THR)

‘Sex and the City 2′ Trailer Needs a Few ‘Hurt Locker’ Moments
Friday, April 9 by

This trailer for Golden Girls Origins Sex and the City 2 has reunited everyone's favorite assholes and relocated them to the Lipstick Desert. When the plot picks up, the ladies are bored with marriage/kids/cougarism and decide to take a group vacation to Abu Dhabi. My big question is 'Why?' Why would anyone go to Abu Dhabi?? Isn't that the place where cartoon characters ship their annoying counterparts after convincing them to climb into wooden crates? Oh, you know what. I now see the logic. Watch the faaabulousssss trailer after the jump…

Steven Spielberg and Discovery Channel Team for ‘Future Earth’
Friday, April 9 by

Spielberg brings his "A" game to every project. Even upskirt videos.A press release from The Discovery Channel announced they are working with Steven Spielberg and Dreamworks Television to develop a new mini-series titled, "Future Earth". In a similar vain as "Planet Earth" and "Life", the series will examine the world of the future to show us how Earth is expected to evolve over the next  25, 50, and 100 years. Spielberg will personally oversee the project. It's yet to be determined if the impending robot uprising will be factored in."We're quite excited to bring our brand of sassy yet dead-in-the-eyes character animation to this revolutionary project," said Jeffrey Katzenberg, Chief Executive Officer of Dreamworks Animation.Although the future may bring prosperous advances to the worlds of technology and medicine, one area that will suffer is fashion. According to leading futurists, hammer pants are expected to make a huge comeback. Weird, I know. (The Futon Critic)

Nicolas Cage Loses One of His Mansions
Thursday, April 8 by

Awww, frowny face. Tragedy has struck in Hollywood. Nicolas Cage has lost another of his fabulous homes to a foreclosing lender.The opening bid for the actor's 12,000-square-foot home was $10.4 million, but there are $18 million worth of loans on the property. The Tudor mansion boasts six bedrooms, a central tower, home theater and an Olympic-sized pool. The house reverted to the foreclosing lender at Wednesday's auction in Pomona. Even though he's one of Hollywood's highest-paid stars, Cage has money troubles. He owes millions in unpaid taxes and in January his foreclosed home in Las Vegas sold for nearly $5 million.How very devastating. Why do bad things always happen to weird people who drop millions of dollars on dinosaur skulls? It really is a shame though. Dude had to wear A LOT of silly wigs to be able to afford those homes. (LA Times)

Bidding War Breaks Out Over Short Film ‘The Gift’
Thursday, April 8 by

Don't drink and drive, Drunk-Rupert-Everett-Servant-Robot. Since District 9 struck box office gold without the use of 3D, Hollywood has been eager to buy up and adapt enticing sci-fi shorts. So it's no surprise that a bidding war has broken out over commercial director Carl Erik Rinsch's The Gift, a look at a futuristic, dystopian Moscow where a robo-butler is hunted down for a box containing either miniature unicorns or rare Lisa Frank stickers. That outcome all depends on how literal Russian-version of Ricky Jay was being. From THR: On Wednesday, the day the short came out, a bidding war broke out between several studios — longtime rivals Warner Bros. and Fox are in the mix, according to sources — who see feature potential in the short. Some speculate the project will end up at Fox, because Rinsch is part of the stable of RSA, Ridley Scott's commercial house that produced the short, and Scott's longtime association with Fox. Rinsch was actually originally attached to the Alien prequel but was later ousted so papa bear Ridley Scott could take the wheel. Maybe Ridley will throw Rinsch his long-gestating Monopoly project. I'd love to see his gritty commentary on the stark living conditions of St. James Place and its neighboring prison.Check out the short after the jump. WARNING: Eligible viewers must pass a saliva scan…

9 Weirdest Crispin Glover Moments
Thursday, April 8 by

 Crispin Glover has "weirdest moments" written all over his incredibly distinctive face. He also seems like he lives his life as though everyday is Halloween. Crispin recently returned to the big screen in Hot Tub Time Machine, and it's my hope that it leads to future projects so we can capture more instances of WTF on camera much like these…Kicking 

Taylor Kitsch Will Star in ‘Battleship’
Thursday, April 8 by

It looks like an actor has willingly signed on to play the lead in Battleship, a Peter Berg joint. Taylor Kitsch, who you probably know from Friday Night Lights or X-Men Origins: Wolverine or John Carter of Mars (if you're behind on your RSS feed and just now reading this in 2012), is now attached to play Alex Hopper, the Commanding Officer of a destroyer who goes toe-to-toe with alien invaders on the high seas.Jeremy Renner was originally in talks for the role but had to drop out when he realized the movie was based on a board game. I'd like to stay optimistic about this until I see a trailer, but I will go on record and let it be known that I'll be very disappointed if a Slinky doesn't burst from a crewmember's chest during a galley scene. (THR)

Slash Is With Coco
Wednesday, April 7 by

Last night on "The Tonight Show (with Jay Leno)," Slash donned a pin in support of Conan O'Brien. That top-hatted rocker couldn't stop being a rebel if he tried, even though his act of defiance was the equivalent of pinning a "Molest Me" sign on your Chemistry teacher's back. We always took it up a notch in my high school. (BuzzFeed)Show these links some support.Get Inside the 'Clerks' Convenience Store (Moviefone)What Does It Feel Like to be Struck by Lightning? (Asylum)Russell Brand Is a Bridezilla (PopEater)25 Terrible Restaurant Signs (HolyTaco)If 'Gran Torino' Was About Doin' Chicks (FilmDrunk)8 Funniest Jorma Taccone Videos (Unreality)Girl's Epic Dunk Fail (TotalProSports)The Ultimate 'Lost' Spin-Offs (Maxim)Gambling Addiction Enabler: UFC 112 Edition (CagePotato)Kristin Cavallari Butt Pics Megapost (CelebJihad)10 Badass Kids Not to Mess With (Smosh)'Jerry Maguire' vs. 'Up in the Air' (Pajiba)The Truth Behind Healthcare Reform (Atom)How to Survive an Explosion (MadeMan)Yet Another Earnhardt Fan Robs Banks (AllLeftTurns)

Harrison Ford Called In for ‘Cowboys & Aliens’
Wednesday, April 7 by

Rugged Hollywood grandpappy Harrison Ford is now officially cast in Cowboys & Aliens as an unspecified character according to director Jon Favreau's Twitter posting:"Please stop asking if Harrison Ford is in Cowboys & Aliens. Okay? He is. Please don’t tell anybody."Umm, for the record Jon, I didn't ask. Okay? Dial back the attitude some. Maybe you need to relax with a travel brochure.Sorry you guys had to see that. Anyway, this may mark the first time Harrison Ford has been in a good movie since Air Force One. That is, if the concept of cowboys and Indians teaming up to fight off alien invaders can yield a good movie. Personally, I feel like it could be quality. If casted correctly….

AMC’s ‘The Walking Dead’ Finds Its Rick Grimes
Wednesday, April 7 by

Last week we reported that AMC picked up "The Walking Dead" to series, securing at least one season of the Frank Darabont exec-produced zombie drama. It's always been my professional (?) opinion that shows thrive when they have lead actors in them, and it looks like the network concured by casting Andrew Lincoln to fill the shoes of small town cop Rick Grimes.Lincoln isn't a huge presence in The States, but if your girlfriend has ever forced you to watch Love, Actually you probably recognize him as the guy who tries to bone Keira Knightley by getting all cutesy.Yeah, yeah, yeah. Whatever happened to a boombox and Peter Gabriel? Kids have no imagination these days. (THR)

Tony Scott Arrives at ‘Potsdamer Platz’
Wednesday, April 7 by

"COOKIE???!!!"Looks like Tony Scott will finally have the chance to make his passion project Potsdamer Platz after nattering on and on about it for the last decade. Sheesh, we get it. You like movies about trains.The film, about a New Jersey crime family expanding their business nationally, is expected to undergo a title and locale change as the latest script has the action moving from Germany to Puerto Rico. Mickey Rourke, Jason Statham, and Javier Bardem are all rumored to be circling the project. Though if Bardem drops out, Scott can probably get Jeffrey Dean Morgan at a bargain rate. It's also being reported that the Crimson Tide director is trying to lure Gene Hackman out of retirement to take part in the film, but inside sources say that isn't happening. I could have told you that. Dude is way too into taking bong rips and playing Forza Motorsport 3 to waste his time making movies. (Deadline)

Disney Reloads ‘Tron Legacy’ Writers for Sequel
Wednesday, April 7 by

It took Disney 28 years to sequelize Tron and, now, negative nine months to start work on a third film. Tron Legacy writers Edward Kitsis and Adam Horowitz have been hired to write another sequel with the intention to round out the story as a trilogy. At this point, it's not known if director Joseph Kosinski or the film's stars will return. It's also not known whether the movie deserves a sequel. Though that's never stopped anyone before.I'm looking at you Resident Evil. (THR)

Seth MacFarlane Brainstorming Session
Wednesday, April 7 by

UPDATE: Apologies, but I was forced to remove this due to copyright issues. You can check out the original article at Cracked HERE, which delves deeper into MacFarlane's process.

Akiva Goldsman Recycling ‘The Toxic Avenger’
Wednesday, April 7 by

Troma's The Toxic Avenger film is a cult hit about a 98-lb weakling who mutates into a misshapen hulk after falling into a vat of toxic waste. He uses his newfound strength to rip evil-doers limb from limb and then sodomize them with said limbs. Today comes news that Akiva Goldsman has picked up the rights to remake The Toxic Avenger without including any of those good parts.The new Toxie will be a green superhero who embarks on PG-13 adventures. Which means instead of introducing a thug's head to his sphincter, he will now introduce thugs to brochures about recycling and Al Gore documentaries. (Deadline)

Death Star Memorial
Tuesday, April 6 by

Luke better not show his face at this remembrance.Let's take a moment for these links.Winona Ryder Joins Ron Howard Comedy (Moviefone)Soda-Drinking May Kill Your Sperm (Asylum)Gwyneth Paltrom Is Filled With Hate (PopEater)25 Mutant Cars (HolyTaco)Internet Geek License Plates (Unreality)33 Super Hot Baseball Girls (TotalProSports)Hot Girls in Hats (Maxim)NCIS: LA Goes MMA-Style (CagePotato)13 Celebs Who Probably Smell Like Cheese (EgoTV)11 Total Burnouts (Smosh)5 TV Shows We Got Tired of Banging (Pajiba)Ways to Save Money: Electricity (Atom)15 Time Management Tips (MadeMan)Leffler Wrecks Buescher in Nashville (AllLeftTurns)25 Confused Animals (RegretfulMorning)

Hugh Jackman Works Blue with Balls in Peter Farrelly’s Upcoming Short
Tuesday, April 6 by

Sometimes I feel like Hugh Jackman extracts his life-force from gay jokes. Between all the song and dance and now this casting announcement, it has to be the only explanation.In Peter Farrelly's upcoming anthology film, titled Untitled Comedy, Jackman will play a bachelor on a date with Kate Winslet. Kate has a hard time concentrating during the social call as Jackman's character has testicles attached to his chin. Nice work, guys. 1999 is laughing its ass off. The short segment, known as The Catch, is just one of several sketches that populate the film.Now that Jackman and "balls on chin" are forever wed in Google bliss, it's a good thing he didn't star in Brokeback Mountain. The combined might of those gay jokes could cause him to go supernova and destroy us all. FLAME ON! (Digital Spy)

Olivia Thirlby Joins ‘The Darkest Hour’
Tuesday, April 6 by

Olivia Thirlby seems ready to break away from her moody indie roots. The star of The Wackness, Juno, and movies I rent accidentally on Netflix has just been cast in Chris Gorak's The Dark Hour. In the film, she'll play an American traveller in Moscow when aliens invade unexpectedly. Thirlby will fight for survival alongside other tourists in the sci-fi epic from the production designer turned director. Between all the random attacks and driving on the wrong side of the road, it doesn't sound that much different than a trip to Detroit.Filming will begin this summer in Moscow at producer Timur Bekmambetov's custom-built production facility where film shoots you. (THR)

Javier Bardem and Jeffrey Dean Morgan are The Same Person
Tuesday, April 6 by

Square jaws, impeccable scruff, squinty eyes, and mussed hair. It's a David Cronenberg film come to life.

Ty Burrell Greases Up for ‘Butter’ Farce
Tuesday, April 6 by

"She's anatomically perfect and she's all mine."Modern Family's Ty Burrell is in final negotiations to star in Butter, a satire about the cut-throat world of competitive butter sculpting. The movie, which also stars Jennifer Garner as his glory-seeking wife, is actually an allegory for the 2008 Presidential primaries with Burrell appearing as a Bill Clinton parody who is forced to step down from his position of butter sculpting champ.Wait. A movie that makes you look smart while you secretly daydream about the creamy taste of fresh butter? Brett Ratner is going to get soooo laid on date night. (Variety)

‘National Treasure 3′ Drafts ‘Prince of Persia’ Writing Duo
Tuesday, April 6 by

It looks like Jerry Bruckheimer has found a kinship with writers Carlo Bernard and Doug Miro. The pair wrote his next two blockbusters, Prince of Persia and The Sorcerer's Apprentice, and now he has them on the hook to write a third National Treasure film for director Jon Turteltaub.When reached for fictional comment, not-real Jerry Bruckheimer had this to say:"The National Treasure films have always displayed a reckless abandon for all semblance of reality. After seeing how Carlo and Doug laughed in the face of physics and history with their other works, Jon and I knew they were the d-bags for the job. It also helps that they can't capture the way people actually talk."No plot specifics have been released yet but we'll keep you posted on Nicolas Cage's hunt for William Henry Harrison's gold or whatever it turns out to be.In the interest of full disclosure, I made that earlier quote up. (Coming Soon)

The Matrix Grants Neo Dope Skillz
Monday, April 5 by

Totally beats classes at The Learning Annex. (Unreality)Plug these links into your brain.Is Hollywood Going Too Crazy With 3D? (Moviefone)Oral Sex Spray Is a Fabulous Deal (Asylum)Tiger Faces Reporters at Augusta (PopEater)25 Sexy Baseball Fans (HolyTaco)Release Schedule for Finest Film Ever Created (FilmDrunk)15 Dumbest Video Game Tattoos You'll Ever See (Unreality)Soccer Player Throws Water Bottle at Fan (TotalProSports)Hottest Celeb Baseball Fans (Maxim)Bob Sapp Won a Fight, But It Wasn't Pretty (CagePotato)Alessandra Ambrosia Lost ALL of Her Baby Weight (CelebJihad)11 Awesome Burn-Out Fails (Smosh)5 Must Manipulative Tearjerkers (Pajiba)Rockateer DUI Caught On Tape (Atom)Get Her from Dinner to Bed (MadeMan)Hot Jordan Fish Pics (AllLeftTurns)

‘Star Wars’ to Be Intentionally Funny With New Animated Sitcom
Monday, April 5 by

Because this turned out so well. An official sanction from LucasFilms has made it okay to laugh at Star Wars. Not the films though. You must remain stone-faced while Hayden Christiansen delivers dialogue and when rubber puppets pop up during the pod race. That is law. What you can laugh at is a new animated series being developed by LucasFilms themselves to presumably cash in on the recent franchise-skewering made popular by "Robot Chicken" and "Family Guy." And the best way to do that is to hire Seth Green and Matthew Seinreich from "Robot Chicken." I posit, however, that the best way to ensure hilarity is to farm it out to France. (Variety)

‘The Big Lebowski’ Porn Parody Trailer, Man
Monday, April 5 by

It made sense to produce a porn parody of box office juggernaut Avatar and television sensations "Dexter" and "The Jersey Shore", but I can't say that The Big Lebowski deserves the same NSFW treatment. Never ever never not even once during a viewing of the Cohen Brothers film have I thought a cut to rough penetration was mysteriously absent. But hell, give the people what they want, and apparently the people want The Dude naked. I just thank my lucky stars they found someone to replace Tara Reid. No one needs to see that Frankenstein body floppin' around.

Old Spice “I’m On a Horse” Guy Belongs to Tyler Perry Now
Monday, April 5 by

Isaiah Mustafa the deodorant-shilling equestrian du jour, has been cast in Tyler Perry's next project. The former NFL player turned weird guy on a horse will appear in Perry's adaptation of his play Tyler Perry's Colored Girls Who Have Considered Suicide When The Rainbow Is Enuf. Pfft, whatever hippie.Mustafa appeared on Oprah's talk show to discuss his newfound fame when Perry himself showed up to offer him the role. It's unclear where Mustafa will fit in with the all-star cast made up of Janet Jackson, Mariah Carey, Whoopi Goldberg, Phylicia Rashad and Anika Noni Rose, which originally featured no male roles. I'm sure he will fit right in though. As long as he doesn't cause Madea to have to take off her earrings. God forbid any man suffer that fate. Elsewhere, Orlando Jones has been cast in real-life as "Who?" (Cinema Blend)

9 Actors Who Should Jump Into T.V.
Monday, April 5 by

Not too long ago, most actors on TV were unknown before they were cast. Guys like Clooney and…other guys like Clooney. Then a trend started where the actors cast were former film stars — of a certain degree, at least. Actors and actresses that were once well-known before bigger and better looking talent overshadowed them. But TV has never shied away from second rate, so the trend has continued and will keep getting stronger. And alas, there are still many more of these former semi-moderately-successful movie stars in the unemployment line waiting for their TV break. Here’s just a partial list of such people and the shows they may be working on next. Because an extensive list might number somewhere in the hundreds. Lou Diamond Phillips

Anna Friel Joins ‘Dark Fields’
Monday, April 5 by

Anna Friel had to wash the smell of Land of the Lost out of her hair by doing theater in London's West End, but she's now returning to Hollywood with a role in Dark Fields. In the film, Bradley Cooper plays a washed-up writer who comes across a drug that makes him more intelligentier smarter. After reaping the rewards of being a know-it-all and schooling his peers at Cranium, he finds the drug has lethal consequences.Friel will play his ex-wife. Robert De Niro and Abbie Cornish are also on board to star in the thriller by Neil Burger. (THR)

Photobomb Fridays: ‘Amadeus’ + Drummer
Friday, April 2 by

Back in 1776 they had zero tolerance for street musicians. Here are your weekend links.The 'Inglourious Basterds' Clapper Board (Moviefone)8 Randomly Encountered Chatroulette Hotties (Asylum)Charlie Sheen Leaving 'Two and a Half Men'? (PopEater)25 Funny Crucifixes (HolyTaco)Tron Party in San Francisco! (FilmDrunk)Cool Gallery of Futurama Cosplay (Unreality)Cheerleading at its Finest (TotalProSports)Release the Crack-en a.k.a Booties! (Maxim)5 Pairs of Boobies You Have to See (Smosh)New Avatar 2 Trailer (CelebJihad)Thiago Alves's Brain Surgery Video-Blog (CagePotato)Miley Cyrus Career Assessment (Pajiba)Gay Ray, The Reggae Gay (Atom)How to Join the Mafia (MadeMan)NASCAR Prop Bets, Version Two (AllLeftTurns)

‘Splice’ Trailer is a Bold Re-Telling of ‘The Ugly Duckling’
Friday, April 2 by

She'll grow out of it. There's finally a trailer for Vincenzo Natali's eery sci-fi/horror Splice, that movie with Adrien Brody and the hot, bald chick with the mouth in her scalp (still kinda hot though). The movie impressed at Sundance and will see wide release on June 4th as a result. The film warns against the dangers of queefing in the face of God and law by creating your own monstrous human-animal hybrid. So seriously, guys. Don't do that kind of thing. Did Species teach you nothing? Check out the trailer after the jump.