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The trailer for Thirst, the new vampire flick from Oldboy director Chan Wook Park, has arrived.  We can usually expect a few juicy taboos from Park, and this one looks like it has it in the form of a bloodsucking priest.  Check out the trailer after the jump…

After noticing Watchmen's Box Office numbers slip 65% in its second weekend, we thought to ourselves, why aren't they marketing this film toward female retirees looking for some full frontal male nudity?  Because, man, there's enough blue penis in this movie to make Vanity Smurf come out of his tiny closet.Well, some folks over at Liquid Generation are helping keep the Watchmen buzz alive at the other end of the age spectrum, and figured that gamers like their penis 8 bits at a time.  Check out this Kung Fu-inspired scrolling actioner featuring a monster… ahem… swordfight… after the jump. 

The Hollywood Reporter breaks the news that TV's MacGyver will be getting the big screen treatment through Raffaella Productions, run by Raffaella De Laurentiis, daughter of Dino De Laurentiis.  Dino will executive produce.  Now, everyone knows that MacGyver is the world's most ingenious adventurer.  He can take a rubber band, a watch and a graphite pencil and make a low-grade bomb to break through a prison wall.  He can use a bowl, a spoon and a can of Campbell's Chunky Soup to overthrow a South American dictator.  You try to do that, Donovan McNabb's mom!Ultimately, though, it's the Mullet that makes the MacGyver.  And we at Screen Junkies thought we could help drastically in the De Laurentiis clan's quest to cast the big screen MacGyver by putting several leading men through what we like to call: The MacMullet Test.See our contenders after the jump and vote for your favorite in the comments section (or feel free to suggest others).  The De Laurentiis family – and MacGyver: The Movie – need your help!

John copes with the loss of his girlfriend while those close to him point fingers at his suspicious cyborg. Sound AdviceJessie sits pondering in an easy chair with Riley’s corpse on the floor beside her.  A flashback occupies her mind.  In it, Derek is explaining to Jessie that he is going on a mission.  He warns her to always aim for the chip (when executing Terminators), kisses her and tells her he’ll see her later.  The flashback ends. After a moment, Jessie stands and zips up the plastic body bag covering John Connor’s late girlfriend.  Sarah is packing things into boxes when John walks in.  It’s pretty clear what’s going on–they’re moving again–so John offers to take care of the garage.  He finds Cameron there, mulling over robot parts.  Afraid of what his mother might do if she finds them, John tells Cameron to bury them so they can be incinerated later. Bad News

This morning I woke up to discover that character actor Ron Silver had died of cancer at age 62.  Silver is probably best known for his work in dramas like The West Wing, Chicago Hope and as the villain in Timecop.  But he also made one of the funniest self-deprecating turns in unaired TV show history when he played the villain – and himself – in the Ben Stiller-created, Jack Black-starring Heat Vision Jack.  See the clip after the jump. And now, the rest of the news… Sam Raimi Talks Remakes & Evil Dead 4! (IGN) Awesome Concept Art from The Goon (/Film) ex-NFL'er Michael Strahan to Follow in OJ Simpson's Path – minus the murder part. (Variety) Thoughts on SXSW screening of Bruno.  Vassup! (AICN) Exclusive I Love You, Man Clip (ComingSoon.Net)

 Turn off that Depeche Mode song and listen up!  We're giving away a free Special Edition DVD or Blu-Ray copy of Twilight, hitting stores Tuesday, March 21st.  And don't give us that, "but Twilight's a chick flick" BS.  You can always win the DVD, then give it to some girl, like you did with The Notebook.  (Or if you're a girl, give it to yourself, because you deserve it.)Here's what you gotta do:1) Sign up for a ScreenJunkies account.2) Watch the clip below.3) Email feedback@screenjunkies.com with a list of ALL 20 VAMPIRE MOVIE TITLES in the order they appear in the clip. AND INCLUDE YOUR SCREEN JUNKIES USERNAME IN THE EMAIL!!! The first person to get it right will be sent his or her copy of Twilight as soon as it hits the street.

It’s right there in the title:  “Part 1.”  Of course this was going to be all setup for next week’s final confrontation, so, knowing that was our expectation, Ron Moore went on a bit of different route.  Here’s the thing: it doesn’t necessarily take an apocalypse caused by Sexy Killer Robots to make life totally suck.  Life can do that all on its own, as we shall see.Edward James Olmos gets to do the previouslies, which are:    •    Starbuck found her own dead body on Earth, which sucks, and after making the mistake, or “mistake,” of confessing her deadness to Gaius Baltar, he outs her.    •    Samuel T. Anders gets a bullet to the brain, and Starbuck, having been given the transcription to “All Along the Watchtow–  Is anybody paying attention?  Is there anybody who is watching this last batch of episodes who is a NEW viewer of Battlestar Galactica?  Because DO NOT start here. Start with the mini-series, for frak’s sake. Sheesh! 

Earlier today, Screen Junkies attended the Fast & Furious junket in Hollywood.  We had a chance to sit down at a roundtable Q&A with most of the principal cast, including Michelle Rodriguez, Jordana Brewster, Paul Walker and Vin Diesel, as well as director Justin Lin.  Probably the juiciest tidbit of information that came out of the sit-down was the hint of where the series might go – literally – should Universal decide to manufacture an even newer model.First up was Paul Walker, who seemed laid back and comfortable to answer everything thrown at him as candidly as possible.  When asked if he was already contracted out for another installment, Walker responded:"No but I've heard it. I've heard it in the rumor mill.  Like, I've spoken with executives at Universal at this point, and they're pretty serious about it.  They know where they want it to take place. They want to do it in Europe."

What would you do if bad people raped and left your daughter for dead?  So spouts the basic message of the trailer for The Last House on the Left, and apparently, from the few clips shown, the answer is to kill them in as cinematically gruesome ways as possible (if it’s funny, that’s a plus).  Wes Craven’s original back in 1972 answered this question by showing us what completely disturbed, depraved, and downright terrifying places a human could go if pushed hard enough.  This remake misses the point – most of the killings wind up feeling like those clichés designed only to make you laugh and maybe cringe a little, but hardly ever scare you, and certainly not disturb you.  This much-hyped remake is something of a dud, and you can check out exactly why after the jump.

The new trailer for the upcoming Sci-Fi thriller, Pandorum has been garnering some interest around the 'Nets, so we thought it was high time we had it here on Screen Junkies.  The film stars Dennis Quaid and Ben Foster, and is schedule to open in September of 2009.   

Director: Christian Alvart Cast: Cam Gigandet, Ben Foster, Dennis Quaid, Norman Reedus, Cung Le Synopsis: A pair of crew members aboard a spaceship wake up with no knowledge of their mission or their identities. Genre: Sci-Fi & Fantasy Release Date: September 4, 2009

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It's the 13th, it's Friday, and the moon is 91% full…Things gonna happen extra weird for you today, what with it being the second freaky friday in a row. Watch out!–dogs will be able to jump extra high, babies will stare at you, and your bike just might blow up if you try riding it.  Luckily for you, TV laughs defiantly in the wretched face of superstition, offering a no-nonsense weekend of black cat bootin,' astrology free programming of superb (and almost over!) Sci-Fi drama, robots, football, and a little methamphetamine. Take charge of your destiny this Friday the 13th, by staying the hell inside! Your preview after the break.

Fox's Searchlight's Miss March opens today, and in its honor, Screen Junkies decided to post a list of our favorite Playboy girls who've graced the silver screen – and many, many times more on home video.  The rules were simple:  If you posed for Playboy first and then in a film, congrats.  You're SAG-eligible and now therefore eligible for our list.  (Maybe SAG is the wrong acronym, here).  On the flip side, if you were already an actress and then felt compelled to see yourself naked in print, then you're also up for our top ten.And if you're Kim Kardashian, well, somehow, you ended up in a movie (albeit Disaster Movie).  We'll throw you a bone.  Drumroll please…#10 SARA JEAN UNDERWOOD

This morning, Cinematical gave us some telling tidbits from that downloadable Indiana Jones transcript we linked to a few days back.  Apparently there was a pretty glaring section dealing with the original intent of Marion and Indy's relationship that isn't quite the squeaky clean serial fun that we remember Raiders of the Lost Ark having.  Start running a hot shower because when you finish reading this, you'll want to stand under it fully clothed.Here's a segment from the transcribed conversation:George Lucas: I was thinking that this old guy could have been his mentor. He could have known this little girl when she was just a kid. Had an affair with her when she was eleven. Lawrence Kasdan: And he was forty-two. 

This morning, The Hollywood Reporter tells us that the classic Stephen King story, It, will be making a leap to the big screen.  The 1990 TV movie adaptation was probably the best TV movie ever made (next to anything Meredith Baxter Birney puts out), and scared the ever loving crap out of me.  I can only imagine what a rated R film could do – but I always knew Pennywise the Clown would be back for me now that I'm an adult.  Dave Kajganich (The Invasion) is set to write the script for Warner Bros.  And now for some news that doesn't summon dark memories from my childhood:Jonah Hill to scribe 21 Jump Street for big screen.  (Film Drunk)Pics from Tim Burton's Alice in Wonderland (ComingSoon.Net)Stimulus Package Movie Night (Film.com)SXSW Update: Troll 2 Gets Its own documentary! (Aint It Cool)

Michael has another one of his brilliant ideas, this one involving sending out five golden tickets randomly to their clients, entitling the finder to 10% off their paper for that fiscal year. Unfortunately, he hides all of them in one shipment, so one company gets 50% off, as Michael wisely failed to include "limit one per customer" on any of the tickets. He must figure out a way to pin the blame on somebody else before a pissed off David Wallace shows up, and you can find out exactly how in this week's Office, right ater the jump.

Ain't It Cool just broke a story this evening with insider information on some of the upcoming Marvel Studios releases whose release dates that Screen Junkies covered this morning.  It seems as though there's a spy among the True Believers at Marvel, and this "Fuzzy Dunlop" has given us some very interesting tidbits on casting, directors and those Fox remakes of Fan 4 and Daredevil we keep hearing about.  Boiled down bullet points after the jump.

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This Friday, you can see starlet Raquel Alessi in her first big role as the titular character in Miss March.  Actually, her character's name is officially Cindi Whitehall, but I just wanted to write titular not only because it's a perfectly appropriate word choice, but also because I'm feeling like an 8-year-old today.  Boobies.Check out a tasteful spread of Miss March herself after the jump.

This week’s episode opens with our star, Liz Lemon, carrying an armload of packages to the 30 Rock building. Kenneth offers to help her with the packages, and she confides in Kenneth that she is starting fresh. She bought all the fixings necessary to get her life in order. Suddenly, she gets hit by a biker. She now knows this will be the worst day of her life. Liz comes into the studio, distressed. She calls the morning meeting and asks everyone to ‘be cool’ for the day–she doesn’t want any problems. Frank comes out of his office with no pants on, and Liz reprimands him. Liz’s assistant Cerie informs Liz she has jury duty. This day is definitely going to blow.

Another highly dependable Thursday night of TV for you. New episodes of The Office and 30 Rock, whilst the best buddy cop movie of all time screens for you to switch back and forth during commericals. On that note, here's some completely arbitrary information–did you know they used the f-word exactly 48 times in that movie? Your much more useful TV preview after the break.

Marvel has announced the release dates for four – count em' – four upcoming films, including Thor, Spider-Man 4, The First Avenger: Captain America and the mega-super-ensemble The Avengers. See how it's shaping up after the jump…

http://www.i-am-bored.com/bored_link.cfm?link_id=38676

Kenny has a girlfriend! Much to the chagrin of his pals, who, when they discover that she's a slut who gave a boy a blowjob in the parking lot of a TGIFridays, warn him of the dangerous diseases, like syphillis, that you can catch from that most vile repository of filth: an American woman's mouth.  Kenny is undeterred, though, and plans to use the "tingly" feeling the Jonas Brothers ignite in her to get his way. Only one problem. The Jonas Brother's new fad? Purity rings. It's the new season of South Park!!! Episode 1: The RingFull Episode Online: TV Dome

What happens when Vin Diesel, Paul Walker and new hard-driving FF villain "Fenix" race against the clock in a secret tunnel underground?  A whole lotta burnt rubber, scratched paint and the occasional wrecked ride.  See for yourself in this brand new clip from the upcoming Fast & Furious – a Break Media exclusive! I had the chance to see a preview of the film, and while this clip lives up to the testosterone-fueled racing of the past films, it's just the tip of the dipstick for the amount of road rage Fast & Furious has to unleash on audiences. Other Junk You Might Like:

According to Variety, Sylvester Stallone's The Expendables cast just expanded by two more: WWE's Stone Cold Steve Austin and Charisma Carpenter, of TV's Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Angel, and CSI.  Looks like Stallone's taking a lotta names, but will the film also kick ass?  And the biggest question still remains… will Ahnold be the icing on this explosives-laced cake?And here is the rest of your morning news:Orphanage director finds home at Summit (Variety)Joaquin Phoenix goes Axl Rose at nightclub (FilmDrunk)Jeff Goldblum joins insemination comedy The Baster (Coming Soon)

HollywoodDeadline's Nikki Finke reported earlier today that Mickey Rourke is, in fact, joining the cast of Iron Man 2 as a villain.  But now Finke follows up with the very surprising news that Black Widow will now be played by Scarlett Johannson, not Emily Blunt, as thought before.

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